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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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ClosetCelt

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ClosetCelt
  • Town/Country : West Hills, U.S
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 24 April 1993 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 4294
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 40 posted

About ClosetCelt : I live for out-of-character moments.
I'm a mutt.
I like foreign guys.
I have perfect pitch.
I like eyes.

ClosetCelt's last visitors

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ClosetCelt's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

ClosetCelt's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that the new management position I'm supposed to start in two days was delayed for a month and a half. I already quit my current job and called my boss gay. FML

#17801951 (122)

I agree, your life sucks (6485) - you deserved it (31128)

On 09/22/2011 at 1:20am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I pretended to drunk text some friends. When in all reality I was sitting home all alone. I don't know what's worse: that I pretended that I was social and drunk, or that the friend I said I was with was actually with them. FML

#17708531 (77)

I agree, your life sucks (6922) - you deserved it (30782)

On 09/10/2011 at 1:05am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend made me watch six hours of "Glee" with her. I don't know what I hate the most, the fact that I actually sat there and watched it or that I'm angry at Finn for breaking up with Rachel. FML

#16301661 (230)

I agree, your life sucks (14650) - you deserved it (23091)

On 05/22/2011 at 7:09pm - misc - by why me -

Today, I sent my boyfriend a well thought out, steamy, and sexy sext message. His reply? "Three bidders for my drums on eBay! Makiiin' Monaaaay!" FML

#16259164 (125)

I agree, your life sucks (23979) - you deserved it (4461)

On 05/19/2011 at 10:08pm - intimacy - by rileycrash (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I finally found out who has been hacking my email account to send dirty messages to my teacher. My dad. FML

#16237606 (174)

I agree, your life sucks (31539) - you deserved it (2529)

On 05/18/2011 at 1:13pm - misc - by Charles (man) - Norway (Akershus)

Today, I was so sick that I was puking and had the runs. While on the toilet, I yelled for my boyfriend to get me a bowl to puke in. As I did so, I saw that a ton of it was forming on the floor in dots. My boyfriend had given me a spaghetti strainer. FML

#16017618 (192)

I agree, your life sucks (32296) - you deserved it (2779)

On 05/02/2011 at 9:51am - health - by megomania (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my husband and I had the grand opening to our new winery. We had a big sign out front saying "FREE GRAPES", to try and get more people interested. People kept giving us dirty looks when passing. We later realized there was something covering the "G". FML

#15903380 (127)

I agree, your life sucks (25100) - you deserved it (7212)

On 04/24/2011 at 12:10am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I came home to find that all my porn magazines have been "censored" with a black sharpie. FML

#15874125 (354)

I agree, your life sucks (18554) - you deserved it (37540)

On 04/21/2011 at 2:30pm - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, I went for a job interview. I was asked if I wanted a drink. I have no idea why, but I replied "a bottle of milk please." FML

#15855605 (208)

I agree, your life sucks (14808) - you deserved it (20449)

On 04/20/2011 at 4:10am - work - by bham boy -

Today, I'm a student vet. Part of my holiday work is to gain experience working at a dairy. A cow came on to the platform for me to inject her udder. As I was bent over, she decided to take a dump. Onto my left eyeball. FML

#15855335 (210)

I agree, your life sucks (32992) - you deserved it (4061)

On 04/20/2011 at 3:27am - animals - by Anonymous - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I picked up on a telemarketer and started speaking in Portuguese. It turns out that this particular telemarketer spoke it as well. Every time I hung up, he called back. Telemarketers get really excited when they find out someone else speaks their language. FML

#15853054 (129)

I agree, your life sucks (10832) - you deserved it (3208)

On 04/19/2011 at 11:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my father who left my family over 10 years ago and never contacted us or paid child support, poked me on Facebook. FML

#15209199 (204)

I agree, your life sucks (46604) - you deserved it (2672)

On 03/05/2011 at 7:24pm - misc - by poked - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I saw my mom run across the house naked for a condom. FML

#14849779 (135)

I agree, your life sucks (41435) - you deserved it (2812)

On 02/05/2011 at 7:02am - misc - by bob - United States (Arizona)

Today, while stocking shelves with canned goods, a kid no older than ten ran down the aisle, knocking down everything in his path. He was followed by his mother who was laughing hysterically. FML

#14840451 (81)

I agree, your life sucks (21622) - you deserved it (1708)

On 02/04/2011 at 3:13pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I scraped the ice off my boss's car windows and thought it'd be funny to scrape a swastika in the ice on his roof. I didn't realize until it thawed off that it scratched it into the paint. He didn't find much humor in it and is making me pay for the damage. FML

#14836415 (33)

I agree, your life sucks (4428) - you deserved it (51857)

On 02/04/2011 at 3:11am - work - by Username -