Chocolate_Chunk

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Chocolate_Chunk

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1950
  • Number of comments : 690
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Chocolate_Chunk's page activity

Visits<b>DomDomDima</b> - the 08/17/2016 at 9:20am<b>Emyka</b> - the 07/10/2016 at 6:54pm<b>Benpie</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 11:40pm<b>AnnaMuffin</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 5:45am<b>david66</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 9:36pm<b>HelenKeller1</b> - the 03/13/2016 at 11:44pm<b>niceguy123</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 2:03am<b>PiscesNation</b> - the 12/16/2015 at 12:33pm<b>Johnm165</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 5:52am<b>bolshevisky</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 6:41pm<b>paskievitchjack</b> - the 09/05/2015 at 1:43am<b>adragon77</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 10:23am<b>Kikiers21042</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 8:43pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 11:27am<b>imahobbitlol</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 7:34pm<b>mrlawlor7777</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 1:18pm<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 5:10pm<b>Princess_Eevee9</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 10:07pm

Fucked!<b>david66</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 3:36am<b>lordofpantry</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 10:51pm

Chocolate_Chunk's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Chocolate_Chunk's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband discovered that whispering anything in my ear will turn me on. He turned to me and whispered 'cheeseburger' in my ear. Unfortunately, I moaned. Now he now laughs about it with our roommate. FML

by Indigo_Kitten / 08/07/2010 at 9:05pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were trying to have intercourse for the first time. One minute into it, he got nervous and farted. What's worse is that his fart scared him, and he asked "What was that?" FML

by Haley. / 03/26/2010 at 7:58pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, I was snuggled in bed with my husband. He thought because my butt was twitching that I was trying to be frisky. So he slapped my ass hard in attempt to get something going. I was actually trying to hold in a huge fart because last night I had diarrhea. Apparently I still have it. FML

by Lovergirl / 01/01/2010 at 3:23pm / United States (Arkansas) / Intimacy

Today, a doctor examined my wrist, which is completely swollen and painful. He diagnosed a case of tendonitis and asked me, "Do you use this hand for a particular sort of sport?" I just smiled like a twit. FML

by Anonymous / 11/27/2009 at 4:24pm / United Kingdom (London) / Health

Today, when approaching a stop light on my motorcycle, I went to extend my left leg as usual to balance when stopped. Apparently my shoelace loop got wrapped around the shift lever and "tied" my shoe to the bike. It's hard to look cool when you fall over for no apparent reason at a stoplight. FML

by Crotch_Rocket_Rider / 10/06/2009 at 1:33pm / United States (Illinois) / Transportation

Today, I was working at the gas station. An old lady was watching me fill her gas tank. A really beautiful girl walked by. I lost concentration and overfilled the tank. I quickly pulled it out and squirted the old lady with a bit of petrol. She was smiling and gave a slight moan. FML

by Fattie / 07/09/2009 at 1:50pm / Malaysia (Sarawak) / Intimacy

Today, while walking in the mall, I had two people race past me in wheelchairs. Thinking they were racing, I started rooting for the one guy that was ahead. Turns out his wheelchair was malfunctioning and the other was chasing after to help. He then slammed and fell into the water fountain. FML

by meantowheels / 06/20/2009 at 10:29pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went biking. I attempted a large hill and lost control, slipped, and fell ten feet into a sewage pit. Riding home covered in crap, my sock caught my chain and I flipped over my bike. My dad had to spray me with the garden hose, bloody and shitty, in the front yard. FML

by fallsdownplenty45 / 06/02/2009 at 7:08am / Taiwan (T'ai-pei) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend and I were "fooling around." It started to get hot and he took out his penis for the first time. This was the first one I've seen in real life so I decided I'd complimented it. I had no idea what to say so I said, "It's pretty." FML

by madzlovesgee / 05/16/2009 at 1:44pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I thought it would be funny to sneak up behind my cat and scare it with a loud "boo!" The cat responded by jumping up, and running across my apartment, which would have been fine, except for the fact she left a trail of liquid shit everywhere she went. FML

by Anonymous / 05/14/2009 at 1:46pm / United States (Kentucky) / Animals

Today, I was playing one on one soccer with a girl like. I accidentally kicked the ball right into her face. The ball rolled back towards me and as I was running to see if she was ok, I kicked the ball... right into her face again. FML

by hyper12332 / 04/29/2009 at 10:35am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, I fell asleep in class. As a joke, my professor used an airhorn to wake me up. I got so freaked out that I punched the girl next to me in the face. She got knocked out. FML

by Anonymous / 03/23/2009 at 3:06pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I babysat a five year old girl. She ran up to me, threw her arms around my waist and said, "YUMMY! I'm going to eat you!" with her face in my crotch. I said sarcastically under my breath, "Finally, some action!" I turned around to find her dad staring at me, having heard. He's my cousin. FML

by tryena / 02/28/2009 at 5:59am / United States (Idaho) / Kids

Today, I was sleeping because I had been sick. The closest bathroom to mine is the one in my parents room. I wake up and feel like I have to throw up, I run into my parents room to go to the bathroom. I walk in on my parents having sex. Shocked, I gasp for air then throw up all over their bed. FML

by Noname / 02/26/2009 at 11:02pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy