ChildRepellent

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Offline (the 03/05/2014 at 5:06am)

ChildRepellent

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 943
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About ChildRepellent : I'm not gonna lie, there never really was any candy. But I meant it when I said my van was full of magical surprises.

ChildRepellent's page activity

Visits<b>randompost</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 10:35pm<b>Count_Coolness</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 9:01pm<b>thebosslikeaboss</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 7:06pm<b>dylanger16</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 12:37am<b>Badman6969</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 12:49am<b>abdiG</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 12:03am<b>DriAA7</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 3:37pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 1:26am<b>G_r_i_f_f_i_n_</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 6:41pm<b>AnaMoore</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 5:49pm<b>boring_boredom</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 6:55pm<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 05/20/2014 at 10:06am<b>Unkreative</b> - the 05/20/2014 at 4:38am<b>WhaleInANail</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 3:44am<b>Death_The_Kid15</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 10:25pm<b>shucks101</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 5:03pm<b>Liam3848</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 8:45am<b>Princessuuke</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 10:22pm

ChildRepellent's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

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ChildRepellent's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to give a deposition ahead of a trial in which my former boss is accused of fraud. I'm not a smart man, and I smoked a joint before heading out to try to calm my nerves. I got way too high and ended up giggling like an idiot through half the deposition. FML

by screwed / 03/20/2014 at 5:03pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I met my mom's new business partner for the first time. I shook his hand, and introduced myself as "Lisa's daughter". I'm a guy. FML

by CurtisWogan / 03/12/2014 at 6:23pm / United States (Georgia) / Work

Today, while waiting in the queue at a supermarket checkout, my three-year-old daughter yells out, "Mom! Mom! Is that a man or a lady in front?" Embarrassed, I reply, "Honey, can't you see that it's a... it's a... a..." FML

by [...] / 12/12/2013 at 9:28am / France (Rhone-Alpes) / Kids

Today, I woke up to a very unpleasant feeling. Apparently, the tattoo I got on my arm a couple of days ago attracted hundreds of ants during its healing process. They were literally carrying away pieces of my skin. I can not get the feeling or image out of my head. FML

by aly55a_mariie / 08/20/2013 at 3:04pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, wanting to impress my date, I bullshitted her about how I was an environmental scientist. She got so impressed that she invited me over to her place. Not her home, her office. So that I could give her pointers on her current project. She's a real environmental scientist. FML

by is there a environmental scientist in the house? / 03/05/2013 at 3:48am / United States (California) / Geek

Today, I got talking to a pretty girl on the subway. Just as she was about to get off, I handed her my phone so that she could give me her number. She ran out with it. FML

by crétin-crédule / 02/26/2013 at 12:02am / France (Limousin) / Love

Today, my loyalty and regularity at my local pizza place were noticed. The delivery guy, when bringing yet another order, asked me if the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles were living with me. FML

by heallven / 01/31/2013 at 7:26am / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife, who is four months pregnant, burst into tears while thinking about the armchair in our living room that we never use. According to her, we're stopping it from living out its destiny as an armchair. FML

by FauteuilEver Alone / 07/05/2012 at 4:11am / France / Miscellaneous

Today, my twin boys who are 5 decided to teach each other how to fly off the shed out back. They are still in their pajamas. Batman's arm is broken and Spiderman has a slight concussion. FML

by optimistic2628 / 10/19/2011 at 10:03am / United States / Kids

Today, after a large, dramatic fight with my girlfriend in a parking lot, we stopped arguing altogether and hugged, dropping the issue. Twenty seconds later, I accidentally slammed her hand in the car door, breaking two of her fingers. FML

by Z / 07/03/2010 at 3:26pm / United States (Missouri) / Love

Today, I went to the DMV to renew my license. When I gave the woman behind the desk my name and social security number she looked confused. She then called over her manager, who did the same thing. Getting nervous, I asked what was wrong. Apparently according to the state of Illinois I'm dead. FML

by driver / 01/06/2010 at 9:55am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation

Today, while talking to my boyfriend, I was frantically searching for my cell phone. He was curious as to what I was doing so I told him. There was long silence followed by laughter. He could hardly breathe as he told me, "Honey you're on your phone talking to me." FML

by hunnydoll / 08/17/2009 at 8:16pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went with my girlfriend to her parents' house. They told me I smelled of cheap vodka. When I told them I worked in a bio lab and used ethanol a lot, they said I was too stupid to do anything like that. My girlfriend broke up with me because her parents think I'm a drunk. FML

by anonymous / 08/12/2009 at 5:01pm / United States (Montana) / Love

Today, I found out my boyfriend stacks things on me while I sleep. Apparently his record is 4 pillows, a textbook, and the cat. FML

by Anonymous / 08/06/2009 at 7:11am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. As I left his house and began to drive away, I see him chasing after my car barefoot. I stop and roll down the window, ready to listen to the speech he has prepared to win me over with. He takes a moment to catch his breath and says "I want my cellphone back". FML

by DramaQueen / 07/19/2009 at 2:45am / Canada (Ontario) / Love