Chilaxe

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Offline (the 01/19/2016 at 6:39pm)

Chilaxe

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4924
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 10 posted

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Chilaxe's page activity

Visits<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 7:24pm<b>EijiNeko</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 10:45am<b>spencer4148</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 11:14pm<b>Iniezian</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 2:59am<b>NykesterWaltzz</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 6:41pm<b>brunettedisaster</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 7:51am<b>whackingsoup</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 3:44pm<b>x0frnak</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 2:05pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 10:36am<b>cdalton</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 9:39am<b>thomcmoore</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 7:34am<b>99volleyball99</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 1:22pm<b>Nevracceptdefeat</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 1:02am<b>elvish7</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 2:41am<b>wild_cherry</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 6:26pm<b>tique22</b> - the 05/20/2014 at 8:12am<b>louisianababe93</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 6:57pm<b>cwaziemamma</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 8:14pm

Chilaxe's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

See all of Chilaxe's badges

Chilaxe's favorite FMLs

Today, my child was refusing to leave the playground. I had to pry her, screaming and crying, from the monkey bars. I then realized I had been assaulting someone else's kid. FML

by anon / 07/14/2011 at 9:51pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, I noticed a disgusting odor that seemed to be radiating off my brother. When I asked him about it, he replied, "I think it's ball sweat. I haven't had a shower in a few weeks, so it's hard to tell." FML

by anonymous / 06/09/2011 at 3:04pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, I was catching the bus to my new job. While waiting at the lights, I decided to play the staring game and ended up staring at a woman in the car next to the bus for ages, really creeping her out. It turns out she's my new boss. FML

by milkymoo / 05/29/2011 at 9:45pm / Cyprus / Work

Today, at 11 weeks pregnant, I excitedly told my best friend that my baby now has fingernails. Her response was, "You're beginning to sound like a pro-life bumper sticker." FML

by CRH / 05/03/2011 at 11:41am / United States (Minnesota) / Health

Today, I found myself crying for an hour when my recreated crush on The Sims 3 game rejected my character and ran off with someone else. FML

by Nxydolli / 04/29/2011 at 3:34pm / United Kingdom (Durham) / Geek

Today, my house was robbed while I sat helplessly on the toilet with violent diarrhoea. I could hear them laughing hysterically. FML

by Mike / 04/25/2011 at 5:39pm / Health

Today, I finally found out what the weird sour smell that's been in my dorm room for a while is. My roommate's sweat. FML

by thatstinks / 04/06/2011 at 11:12pm / Iceland / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized I don't know which is sadder: the fact I have detailed conversations with myself in my car, or that I bought a Bluetooth earpiece so that I can do it in public without people thinking I'm a complete lunatic. FML

by shelby / 03/30/2011 at 12:54am / United States / Health

Today, I ate something really sticky so I had to wash my hands and mouth. I saw a tea towel on the bench so I was wiped myself with that. Then I noticed it smelt really bad. I had just cleaned my face with turps. FML

by Anonymous / 03/04/2011 at 8:39am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health

Today, I was walking to the shops when I saw my friend about 10 metres in front of me, waiting at the traffic lights, by herself. Jokingly, I shouted out "Who's that really ugly person waiting at the lights?" The girl turned around. It wasn't my friend. FML

by Anonymous / 02/07/2011 at 6:43am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was talking to my girlfriend on the phone. The subject of abuse came up and I told her that if her father ever hurt her I would cut his dick off. The next thing I hear is, "Don't say shit you can't back up!" Her father had picked up the phone the moment I'd said it. FML

by Fucked / 01/24/2011 at 5:47pm / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy

Today, I was at the grocery store with my dad. He let out a very silent but foul abomination of a fart. The people behind us started gagging, so he turned, pointed at me and said "That was my daughter." FML

by Anonymous / 01/18/2011 at 3:28am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, in dance class, the instructor asked me to demonstrate the splits to the group. I slid down, my legs opening wider as I descended. I then loudly farted for the full 5 seconds it took to reach the ground. FML

by SkinsCastSelection / 01/17/2011 at 11:44am / Switzerland / Health

Today, I was in the car with my mom. We were discussing my brother, how he's been screwing up majorly lately and she blamed it on his friends. Then she turned to me and said, "It's a good thing you've never had any friends." FML

by Amanda / 12/13/2010 at 11:29am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I hit a car while trying to park. Assuming that no one saw, I moved my car and parked somewhere else. Hours later I get a call from the university police. While backing up to go to the police station I hit another car. FML

by eyeleanify / 12/10/2010 at 3:12am / United States (California) / Transportation