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Chilaxe

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Chilaxe
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 470
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

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Chilaxe's favorite FMLs

Today, I caught a cab to take me to a hospital appointment. The driver turned around and told me I was in the Cash Cab. I got really excited and screamed. That is, until she laughed and said, "Just kidding. I always wanted to do that to someone." FML

#17128085
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33178) - you deserved it (8187)

On 07/15/2011 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, my child was refusing to leave the playground. I had to pry her, screaming and crying, from the monkey bars. I then realized I had been assaulting someone else's kid. FML

#17113139
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13843) - you deserved it (61778)

On 07/14/2011 at 9:51pm - kids - by anon (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I noticed a disgusting odor that seemed to be radiating off my brother. When I asked him about it, he replied, "I think it's ball sweat. I haven't had a shower in a few weeks, so it's hard to tell." FML

#16579726
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36891) - you deserved it (3623)

On 06/09/2011 at 3:04pm - health - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was catching the bus to my new job. While waiting at the lights, I decided to play the staring game and ended up staring at a woman in the car next to the bus for ages, really creeping her out. It turns out she's my new boss. FML

#16408581
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9602) - you deserved it (41972)

On 05/29/2011 at 9:45pm - work - by milkymoo (woman) - Cyprus

Today, at 11 weeks pregnant, I excitedly told my best friend that my baby now has fingernails. Her response was, "You're beginning to sound like a pro-life bumper sticker." FML

#16031516
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22429) - you deserved it (18056)

On 05/03/2011 at 11:41am - misc - by CRH (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I found myself crying for an hour when my recreated crush on The Sims 3 game rejected my character and ran off with someone else. FML

#15978808
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15386) - you deserved it (48649)

On 04/29/2011 at 3:34pm - love - by Nxydolli (man) - United Kingdom (Durham)

Today, my house was robbed while I sat helplessly on the toilet with violent diarrhoea. I could hear them laughing hysterically. FML

#15922476
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42891) - you deserved it (4503)

On 04/25/2011 at 5:39pm - misc - by Mike -

Today, I finally found out what the weird sour smell that's been in my dorm room for a while is. My roommate's sweat. FML

#15673265
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23655) - you deserved it (2441)

On 04/06/2011 at 11:12pm - misc - by thatstinks - Iceland

Today, I ate something really sticky so I had to wash my hands and mouth. I saw a tea towel on the bench so I was wiped myself with that. Then I noticed it smelt really bad. I had just cleaned my face with turps. FML

#15195010
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13416) - you deserved it (8885)

On 03/04/2011 at 8:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was walking to the shops when I saw my friend about 10 metres in front of me, waiting at the traffic lights, by herself. Jokingly, I shouted out "Who's that really ugly person waiting at the lights?" The girl turned around. It wasn't my friend. FML

#14879534
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9141) - you deserved it (37948)

On 02/07/2011 at 6:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was talking to my girlfriend on the phone. The subject of abuse came up and I told her that if her father ever hurt her I would cut his dick off. The next thing I hear is, "Don't say shit you can't back up!" Her father had picked up the phone the moment I'd said it. FML

#14699951
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20069) - you deserved it (9326)

On 01/24/2011 at 5:47pm - intimacy - by Fucked (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was at the grocery store with my dad. He let out a very silent but foul abomination of a fart. The people behind us started gagging, so he turned, pointed at me and said "That was my daughter." FML

#14622916
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28914) - you deserved it (3133)

On 01/18/2011 at 3:28am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, in dance class, the instructor asked me to demonstrate the splits to the group. I slid down, my legs opening wider as I descended. I then loudly farted for the full 5 seconds it took to reach the ground. FML

#14613104
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28143) - you deserved it (5107) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 11:44am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - Switzerland - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I was in the car with my mom. We were discussing my brother, how he's been screwing up majorly lately and she blamed it on his friends. Then she turned to me and said, "It's a good thing you've never had any friends." FML

#14189966
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25658) - you deserved it (3286)

On 12/13/2010 at 11:29am - misc - by Amanda - United States

Today, I hit a car while trying to park. Assuming that no one saw, I moved my car and parked somewhere else. Hours later I get a call from the university police. While backing up to go to the police station I hit another car. FML

#14150580
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5408) - you deserved it (45191)

On 12/10/2010 at 3:12am - misc - by eyeleanify (woman) - United States (California)



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