About ChiddyBANGr : Island of Oahu. Junior in High School. Virgooo. Shyanne
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Today, I received a package from a local guy on Craigslist. Instead of the iPhone I paid $350 for, the box only contained a photo of an iPhone. The guy had been dumb enough to attach a return address, so my husband went over and beat the shit out of him. I now have to bail him out of jail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32538) - you deserved it (8442)
On 12/23/2012 at 12:52pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, my boyfriend is seriously mad at me for telling his cat what he got it for Christmas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26898) - you deserved it (5892)
On 12/23/2012 at 3:24am - animals - by Kate (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I received my soccer team jacket that I ordered a month ago. Trying to save money, I'd selected the "no name" option to avoid an extra $20 embroidering fee. My jacket now has "NO NAME" spelled out on the side of it, and I was charged the extra $20 dollars after all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33058) - you deserved it (6448)
On 12/23/2012 at 12:01am - money - by Anonymous (man) - Canada
Today, my boyfriend grabbed my boob, shook it savagely, and shouted "Earthquake!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (25392) - you deserved it (6396)
On 12/17/2012 at 6:12pm - misc - by Ape (woman) - United States
Today, I had plans for a romantic night with my boyfriend, who is perfect in every way possible. We were going to have sex for the first time as well. Unfortunately, I had a dream last night about him shitting all over me and I can't look at him with a straight face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24947) - you deserved it (9324)
On 12/17/2012 at 3:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I saw my crush at the grocery store. He saw me and started walking towards me. I got so excited that I farted when he came near. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28593) - you deserved it (8161)
On 12/16/2012 at 7:58pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, at a Christmas party, my crush came up to me and cutely pointed out that I was standing under mistletoe. The only response my stupid brain could think of was, "Probably full of nargles though." He gave me a confused look and walked away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19810) - you deserved it (8928)
On 12/16/2012 at 6:51pm - love - by Rhine (woman) - Barbados (Saint Michael)
Today, on the way out to buy groceries, my boyfriend asked if I'd like him to buy some of my favourite flowers. Happy with his rare show of affection, I said yes. When he returned, he gave me a bag of our usual brand of flour and laughed hysterically in my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19852) - you deserved it (3293)
On 12/15/2012 at 7:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, after my girlfriend has recently become obsessed with the serial-killer show, Dexter, she has grown an interest in cutting up pomegranates in many different ways and squirting the red, blood-like juice everywhere. I am now afraid to argue with her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20829) - you deserved it (2458)
On 12/15/2012 at 7:33am - love - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my brother paid the DJ $300 to ruin my wedding by playing the Imperial Death March as I walked down the aisle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30518) - you deserved it (4017)
On 12/15/2012 at 3:52am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)
Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. I went slowly to build up the excitement, and I thought it was working really well, until he sighed, "For fuck's sake, it's a dick, not a shotgun." and told me to stop embarrassing him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26337) - you deserved it (7164)
On 12/14/2012 at 7:27pm - intimacy - by sucks at sucking (woman) - United Kingdom (Bournemouth)
Today, I was on a crowded bus when the woman behind me vomited. The guy next to her was a sympathy puker. So were 3 other people. There was no room to escape. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22433) - you deserved it (1106)
On 12/14/2012 at 7:28am - misc - by MiscHats (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I had the pleasure of finding out how it feels to poop with 3 broken ribs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22858) - you deserved it (1489)
On 12/14/2012 at 1:44am - health - by mysidesaresplitting - United States (Michigan)
Today, my drunk girlfriend maxed out my credit card, on an "authentic" Jesus Christ autograph on eBay. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21991) - you deserved it (3549)
On 12/12/2012 at 9:14pm - misc - by maxedoutidiot - United States
Today, in art class, our instructor called me up to the front to model for a drawing. I agreed to pose because it was nice to be called on, and I needed a self-esteem boost. He then thanked me, saying it's a great exercise for the class to draw such strange proportions. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18020) - you deserved it (1299)
On 12/12/2012 at 3:48pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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