About CheyMiichelle : 20/Married/Mommy-To-Be.
Please take the hint I'm sick of 15 year olds messaging & asking if I want to "trade pics".
Otherwise, I'm a pretty simple person. I'm a cheese addict, who's also addicted to Dishonored & Bioshock. I live right outside the shit-hole others call Atlanta. I go to school for medical admin, although I think I want to do social work, was a licensed bartender till I found out I have a little bugger on the way, ❤️ so, I just do school right now. I obsess over cleaning & own far too much lipstick. 👍 I swear I'm easy to get along with, despite how "mean" the first three lines of this may seem, not the best at checking messages but I promise I'll reply asap.
About CheyMiichelle : 20/Married/Mommy-To-Be.
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CheyMiichelle's favorite FMLs
Today, I joked to a client that every time I see his name, I start singing the song 'Dr Jones' by Aqua. He looked blankly at me, so I broke into song, 'Dr Jones, Dr Jones, calling Dr Jones... ' He still looked blankly, but now also utterly horrified, as were the rest of the waiting room. FML
by banana_tree / 04/21/2014 at 5:26pm / United Kingdom / Work
by Anonymous / 04/20/2014 at 12:03am / United States (Idaho) / Animals
by Ow / 04/18/2014 at 7:09am / United States (Arizona) / Health
by pablito / 04/17/2014 at 6:37am / France (Rhone-Alpes) / Animals
Today, my co-worker started talking in third person. Not only that, but he narrates his daily tasks. "Jeff reached for a stapler", "Jeff stapled a report". I have to sit beside this chimp for 8 hours a day, and nothing I say can end this. FML
by war_monkey / 04/10/2014 at 8:20am / Canada (Ontario) / Work
Today, my husband and I had some bath time to ourselves. After having sex, he decided to put bath salts in my vagina to spice things up for the next round. It's been twenty minutes out of the bath and it still feels like there are pop rocks in my vagina. FML
by Anonymous / 03/31/2014 at 10:08pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by and not even in the good way / 03/30/2014 at 4:36pm / United States / Kids
Today, fed up with my nerdy appearance, I got my hair shaved off, hoping for a Walter White kind of look. I didn't think it was too bad, but not even an hour later, I'd already been called a "fat Bruce Willis" and compared to a freshly circumcised penis. FML
by richard / 03/21/2014 at 12:10pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, a tiny worm was wriggling across the screen of my Mac laptop. I tried to wipe it away with my thumb, but it just kept crawling. Turns out the worm lives *inside* my screen, beneath the glass. FML
by Anonymous / 03/21/2014 at 1:14am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
by LeChameauTrisomique / 03/14/2014 at 12:33am / France (Centre) / Work
Today, my mother asked me why her new airsoft gun wasn't working. I explained to her that it doesn't actually shoot air, it requires pellets too. She looked at me like I was too stupid to be her son. FML
by Drizztreri / 03/04/2014 at 7:09pm / United States (Missouri) / Kids
Today, I was doodling randomly during a meeting at work, and I noticed my drawing was beginning to look a bit like a penis. A coworker was eyeing it so I tried to make it something else by adding... oh good, now it's a penis and balls. FML
by doodler / 02/27/2014 at 6:59am / United States (Texas) / Work
Today, my pregnant wife's parents called me at work, saying she'd been crying inconsolably and wouldn't say what was wrong. After pleading with my boss, I rushed home. Turns out there was an "ugly" sofa in a TV ad and she felt it was "picking on ugly sofas". FML
by fuckmeitsgettingworse / 02/24/2014 at 2:36pm / United Kingdom (Derby) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was walking home, when a car heading the other way hit a traffic cone. I must have been an asshole in a previous life, because the universe decided to make sure the cone flew into the side of my head. The bystanders were shocked for all of two seconds before laughing. FML
by Anonymous / 02/22/2014 at 4:02pm / United States (California) / Health
Today, I had satanic gastric distress. Attempting to make light of this fact, and, being incredibly bored and seemingly alone at work, I managed to fart the intro to "Smoke on the Water" perfectly. Somebody clapped. FML
by Charlie529 / 02/19/2014 at 10:30am / South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal) / Health
- Today, I entered the bathroom to discover that my brother had left semen and filthy water all over… Today, the office I work at put up a "No Masturbating at Desks" sign. I'm disappointed by this, not… Today, my girlfriend wanted to try having sex despite her serious body image issues. Unfortunately,…