About CheshireHalli : I'm currently a staff accountant for a small town accounting firm. I love playing with Halloween makeup, but I love Batman more. :) im pretty friendly, so send me a message if you'd like to talk.
CheshireHalli's FML badges
You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
CheshireHalli's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 01/02/2016 at 5:31pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, I was driving a little over the speed limit, when I saw a cop car waiting to join the road ahead of me. I quickly hit the brakes so they wouldn't have a payday with me. I hit the brakes too hard, lost control and almost ended up on someone's lawn. FML
by Anonymous / 01/02/2016 at 2:04am / United States (California) / Transportation
Today, I was standing in line at the checkout, and my children were arguing with each other. The guy in front of me sighed loudly and told me over his shoulder: "There're these things called condoms, you know." FML
by Anonymous / 12/31/2015 at 5:33pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids
by debiebs / 12/29/2015 at 7:04am / Brazil (Bahia) / Love
by zzarzzur / 12/29/2015 at 4:49am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I got together a surprise party for my mom's birthday. I invited all her friends and her douchebag boyfriend who I don't get along with. When my mom got home, he took credit and got her friends to back him up with bribing. My mom said I'm selfish and horrible for not trying for her. FML
by Anonymous / 12/28/2015 at 7:00pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend finally proposed to me in front of his whole family with the ring his mother had helped him pick out. Two hours later, I found emails of nudes from another women that had been sent to him a week prior, on his phone. Our flight for home leaves in a week. FML
by FMeRight? / 12/28/2015 at 3:15pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend's dad came onto me. I was shocked and awkwardly tried to exit the situation. My boyfriend then sprang out and started shouting at me. Apparently, it was a "test" to see if I would still be attracted to him in 30 years. I failed. What. The. Fuck. FML
by _schaden_freude / 12/27/2015 at 12:31pm / United Kingdom (Kent) / Love
by Anonymous / 12/26/2015 at 7:38pm / Brazil (Santa Catarina) / Love
Today, I thought it'd be funny to sneak up behind my dad and yell "BOO!" to scare him. He didn't even flinch. All he did was calmly look over his shoulder and sigh, "Oh for fuck's sake. And you wonder why I don't love you." FML
by Anonymous / 12/26/2015 at 3:29am / Australia (Western Australia) / Miscellaneous
Today, my brother "pranked" me by dropping my new laptop out my bedroom window. He'd set up a saran wrap safety net below to catch my laptop safely, but he didn't secure it well enough. My laptop is completely fucked and he won't accept responsibility because he didn't mean to break it. FML
by probably on death row soon / 12/25/2015 at 1:32pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, I threw a punch at my sensei like he told me to, except he failed to block it like he assured me he would. Now I'm banned from his classes and I'm pretty sure he's going to get the police involved. FML
by Anonymous / 12/23/2015 at 10:48am / India (Maharashtra) / Miscellaneous
Today, it's been a week since I flew down to stay with my long distance boyfriend. We went on long walks on the shore, under the stars, and had an unforgettable picnic viewing the sunset. I just now received a message of screenshots displaying him attempting to hook up with another girl. FML
by Nothing Special / 12/23/2015 at 1:54am / United States (Tennessee) / Love
Today, I went to meet a guy that i had already started to be involved with at a bar. We laughed, kissed and had a great time, until he admitted he was just doing all of this to make his ex-girlfriend jealous. Guess who was waiting for me outside. FML
by ThankYou! / 12/22/2015 at 12:50am / Canada (Manitoba) / Love
Today, my 15 year-old brother told us his girlfriend is pregnant. He was taught in his abstinence-only sex ed that condoms don't prevent pregnancy. My parents are blaming her pregnancy on me, for not telling him the truth about sex, because parents giving their kids the sex talk is "too awkward." FML
by Serenadipity / 12/21/2015 at 10:37pm / United States / Intimacy
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…