Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

CheshireHalli

Offline (8 minutes ago) | Search for a member

CheshireHalli

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 16 September 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 16244
  • Number of comments : 383
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About CheshireHalli : I'm currently a legendary host at Texas Roadhouse. I love playing with Halloween makeup, but I love Batman more. :) im pretty friendly, so send me a message if you'd like to talk.

CheshireHalli's page activity

Visits<b>rylaii</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 4:37am<b>McDiabeeto</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 1:40am<b>Rubixiam</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 2:20am<b>Pstraka6</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 4:29am<b>NebulaNick</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 3:16am<b>gs12345_</b> - the 12/26/2014 at 8:50pm<b>feven</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 9:19am<b>americanafrican</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 1:36pm<b>jvfelicio</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 12:19am<b>Radioactive_Kiwi</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 12:13pm<b>Vanillanougat</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 4:11pm<b>Posthuman</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 1:06pm<b>pantherfan0877</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 10:51am<b>ilovemsminaj</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 2:14pm<b>xSLEEPYxHEADx</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 9:56am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 9:51pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 12:00pm<b>terryaly</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 4:09am

CheshireHalli's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of CheshireHalli's badges

CheshireHalli's favorite FMLs

Today, a customer said the pants she was buying rang up more than advertised. I quietly told her plus-sizes were not on sale. The customer yelled in front of a whole line of people, "So I'm fat and can't read! Any other insults you'd like to throw at me?" and stormed out of the store. FML

#21301098
121 comments

Today, I got in trouble for shooting my paintball gun at a piece of wood, so my dad told me to go wash it. While I was washing it, he shot me several times in the back, yelling, "That's payback for being born." FML

#21300331
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32001) - you deserved it (3308)

On 11/16/2014 at 9:26pm - misc - by no - United States

Today, I had to endure my father going on a sexist rant about how women shouldn't be allowed to go to university because it's "unrealistic" since "all women" become stay-at-home mums. This is the same man who threatened to kick me out if I dropped out of uni. FML

#21299878
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30998) - you deserved it (2409)

On 11/15/2014 at 10:44pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, a friend wanted to show me a game he bragged he was the best at. I beat his score on the first try, and now I have a black eye to prove it. FML

#21299775
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27342) - you deserved it (2682)

On 11/15/2014 at 7:41pm - misc - by SeaBind - United States (Michigan)

Today, I asked my dad for advice. I recently got drunk and had a one-night stand. I feel terrible, because I'm engaged to a wonderful lady. My dad just said, "You did the right thing, son, keep it up. She's gonna steal half ya shit in the divorce anyway". FML

#21299758
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19708) - you deserved it (29276)

On 11/15/2014 at 7:04pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, one of my debate opponents used the "Bill O'Reilly defense" against my arguments. This involved saying "You can't explain that" about easily explained stuff, and speaking louder and louder to drown out my voice. He ended up getting a better grade than mine. FML

#21298962
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27909) - you deserved it (2824)

On 11/14/2014 at 1:39pm - misc - by shreking_bawl (man) - Norway

Today, my boyfriend bought us plane tickets to Mexico for our "Honeymoon". This would be nice if he had proposed and if we'd been dating for longer than 2 weeks. FML

#21297437
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34584) - you deserved it (3272)

On 11/12/2014 at 12:21am - love - by anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, like any other day since that stupid movie Frozen came out, people have been asking me if I want to build a snowman, like they're the funniest people on the planet. My name is Elsa. FML

#21297408
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44072) - you deserved it (3852)

On 11/11/2014 at 11:34pm - work - by elsatheannoyed (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend of four years broke up with me over some rumors he heard about me. These rumors are from high-school, seven years ago. FML

#21297338
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34290) - you deserved it (2947)

On 11/11/2014 at 10:31pm - love - by ugh - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my wife slapped me for touching her boobs during sex. FML

#21296872
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47184) - you deserved it (4856)

On 11/11/2014 at 10:37am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my brother offered me $20 to practice his kissing on me for his date later this evening. FML

#21296136
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42738) - you deserved it (4036)

On 11/10/2014 at 11:31am - misc - by SisterOfTard (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my anxiety got so bad that when I stole a sword in Skyrim and resisted arrest, I had a full-on panic attack as I ran away. I ended up curling up on the sofa as my character got hacked to death on the TV. FML

#21294889
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30233) - you deserved it (7978)

On 11/08/2014 at 5:49pm - health - by Anonymous S'wit (man) - Portugal

Today, I tried to blackmail my dad by threatening to tell mom about the bong and weed he keeps hidden in the garage. Turns out she already knew about it and neither of them give a shit. Now I'm grounded until the new year. FML

#21294812
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17591) - you deserved it (33142)

On 11/08/2014 at 3:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I swapped out my maternity gown for a regular old t-shirt. My visiting mother-in-law called me a fatass and said I need to lose weight. I'd given birth just 40 hours earlier. FML

Today, I finally found out why my husband is always so eager and happy to buy me whatever I am craving during my pregnancy. It's because it gives him an excuse to meet up with his mistress and have a quickie. FML

#21294259
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53516) - you deserved it (2952)

On 11/07/2014 at 6:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Nova Scotia)



Idan Schneider's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Idan Schneider's illustrated FML
  • Oi! Stop "playing" that digeridoo and get out! There, now that I've tidied up my apartment, we can begin. How are you all doing? Have you got your leather jacket out of storage to go hang out down at…

Thursday 22 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: