About CheshireHalli : I'm currently a staff accountant for a small town accounting firm. I love playing with Halloween makeup, but I love Batman more. :) im pretty friendly, so send me a message if you'd like to talk.
CheshireHalli's FML badges
You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
CheshireHalli's favorite FMLs
Today, my soon-to-be mother-in-law decided that she is going to be in charge of planning my wedding. All decisions must be approved by her, and anything she doesn't like will be thrown out. She also wants to go on our honeymoon with us to make sure I don't "defile" her son. FML
by Anonymous / 05/20/2016 at 3:38pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by The_Waffle / 05/14/2016 at 1:17pm / United States (Ohio) / Animals
Today, I found an injured rabbit by the side of the road. I was about to take it to the local vet, when my husband picked it up and casually snapped its neck. "No rabbit's worth my money" he said, forgetting that he's been a jobless moocher for over 3 years. Pass me the goddamn divorce papers. FML
by Anonymous / 05/14/2016 at 6:34am / United States (Texas) / Animals
Today, I asked a girl at the restaurant I work at if she'd had enough to eat. When she said yes, I said, "Are you sure?" I didn't realize how insulting it sounded until her equally overweight mom was up in my face, demanding to see my manager. FML
by hadrienne's pall / 05/13/2016 at 3:25pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work
by Erbtosis / 05/12/2016 at 10:40pm / United States (Washington) / Love
Today, my husband and I got into a huge fight about his ex-fiancée, after I found out he's been confessing his love to her behind my back. Our fight ended with him yelling that yes, she's the love of his life, "But I still married you, didn't I?" FML
by JustTheWife / 05/12/2016 at 1:24pm / Denmark / Love
Today, I made a new friend at my college campus, which was great, until I added him on Facebook and he started liking posts from 3 years ago, asking if he could be my "dirty little secret" because he knows that I have a boyfriend. FML
by creeper-status / 05/05/2016 at 1:37pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, some guy on a bike kept taunting me about my weight while I was out jogging. He ended up hitting a street lamp and fell off his bike. I had a real good laugh at him for all of 5 seconds before he got mad and really made me run. FML
by Anonymous / 04/29/2016 at 1:59pm / United States / Health
by Fuck's sake! / 04/24/2016 at 9:34pm / Singapore / Work
Today, my boyfriend wrote me a love letter saying about how much he cares for me, how he'd die for me and how he wants to spend his life with me. What really took my breath away was the confession at the end about how he "accidentally" cheated on me with my best friend. FML
by Anonymous / 04/22/2016 at 10:22pm / United States (Georgia) / Love
Today, after breaking up with my boyfriend of 2 years, I was backing out of his driveway when he came running out yelling "STOP!" I thought he wanted to make up so I kept going, until I'd run over his dog. FML
by itsnotyouitsme / 04/20/2016 at 2:54pm / United States (California) / Animals
by anonymous / 04/19/2016 at 11:09pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
Today, my husband's ex-girlfriend is getting a restraining order on him. Turns out, for the past 2 years of our marriage, he has been trying to contact her and ditching work to stalk her. To top it all off, he told me not to come to court with him because he doesn't want her to see he downgraded. FML
by Anonymous / 04/19/2016 at 8:56pm / United States (California) / Love
by Notpunny / 04/18/2016 at 6:58pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 04/15/2016 at 3:46pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
- Today, while putting on a load of laundry, I squeezed the detergent bottle and it made a noise like… Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try cybersex, because we rarely see each other these days. We… Today, I found out that even though my parents have been married for 21 years, our "family friend,"…