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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, my 3 year old nephew was sitting on my knee at the computer. He was annoying me as he kept on pressing all the buttons. To scare him off I did a creepy voice in his ear that makes him cry. He turned round and broke my nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11347) - you deserved it (59909)
On 05/06/2009 at 1:04pm - misc - by ElamentalAngel - United Kingdom
Today, my family was preparing a turkey for my grandma's birthday dinner when my aunt noticed a utensil on the counter and asked what it was for. My mom said it was used to keep the turkey's legs together. My aunt responded to her by saying, "Maybe you should get one for your daughter." FML
I agree, your life sucks (84850) - you deserved it (16570)
On 05/06/2009 at 12:57pm - intimacy - by Familyskank (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I was excited about my friend going wedding dress shopping. Before I went to go work out, I decided to try on a prom dress from high school to remember what it felt like to get dressed up. It was too tight, I broke the zipper, and spent 45 minutes trapped before I cut myself out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15971) - you deserved it (33429)
On 05/06/2009 at 11:04am - misc - by Fatty (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I went to donate blood for the first time. When they stuck the needle in my arm, I had a panic attack and begged that they take it out. The woman helping me told me she'd take it out in a moment and left. It was then that the Red Cross stole a pint of my blood while I had a panic attack. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39809) - you deserved it (12427)
On 05/05/2009 at 8:22pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was riding my bike with my parents. They make me wear a helmet when I'm with them. Some college age kids drove past and yelled, "Nice helmet!" My mother then told me, "They like you!" I'm sixteen and my helmet is blue. With flowers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43268) - you deserved it (6429)
On 05/05/2009 at 8:42am - misc - by dinosawerr (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was insulted online by a teenager who said that I was probably a fat loser that still lives with their mother and a couple of cats. They were right. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25086) - you deserved it (49084)
On 05/05/2009 at 6:32am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. We got on the discussion of animals, and I showed them a picture of my cat on my phone. Being a touchscreen, when her father grabbed it, it changed picture. To a picture of my girlfriend, fully nude. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26196) - you deserved it (62982)
On 05/05/2009 at 3:43am - love - by sunboy52 (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, we watched a movie in French class. I went on a French exchange last year, so I wanted to sound all impressive and cultured for my crush who is in the same class. I said that it was my favorite movie and I couldn't wait to watch it with everyone. The movie turned out to be about incest. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6346) - you deserved it (58831)
On 05/04/2009 at 10:41pm - misc - by daddyslittlegirl250 (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, we watched a movie in French class. I went on a French exchange last year, so I wanted to sound all impressive and cultured for my crush who is in the same class. I said that it was my favorite movie and I couldn't wait to watch it with everyone. The movie turned out to be about incest. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6346) - you deserved it (58831)
On 05/04/2009 at 10:41pm - misc - by daddyslittlegirl250 (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I ran for my school's elections for President. I thought I was popular enough to win. I lost, by 61 votes, my grade is only 62 people. I was the only one to vote for myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50469) - you deserved it (9049)
On 05/04/2009 at 8:43pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)
Today, I found a box of birthday candles sitting on the coffee table. Bored, I lit one, and after a minute I threw it away and sat back down on the couch. I started looking at the box and noticed that it said "Magic Re-Lighting Candles" at the exact moment that my trash can burst into flames. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21423) - you deserved it (54870)
On 05/04/2009 at 4:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, while watching TV, I danced, sang along, and helped Dora the Explorer get to her Grandmother's house. It was the most fun I've had all year. I'm 21. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50834) - you deserved it (21038)
On 05/04/2009 at 5:09am - kids - by Amey (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I was leaving a campus parking garage. Suddenly, a huge man appeared behind me and kept saying "HEY!" "STOP!" In a gruff voice. I picked up my pace and so did he. I finally turned to him with a can of mace and threatened to use it. He was trying to return the $5 bill I dropped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9937) - you deserved it (43622)
On 05/04/2009 at 1:08am - misc - by CriminalMistake (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I was at the gym and I saw a really cute guy working out nearby. I tried to get his attention by taking off my shirt and smiling at him. When he walked over to me, instead of asking for my number, he just said "Can you please put that back on? Thanks". FML
I agree, your life sucks (14259) - you deserved it (38865)
On 05/03/2009 at 8:36pm - misc - by Gjkashldf (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was about to lose my virginity with my girlfriend of 2 years, when I got an urgent phone call from my 9-year-old sister, telling me I had to come home immediately. My grandma fell off the toilet and got stuck between the bowl and the wall. I'm not making this up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (208213) - you deserved it (10119)
On 05/03/2009 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Friday 24 May 2013
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