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Charniak40

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Charniak40

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  • Number of visits : 78
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Charniak40's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to drag my grandmother out of a store because she went up to a black family and started apologizing for slavery. FML

#20472335
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39712) - you deserved it (2680)

On 01/21/2013 at 11:08pm - misc - by daddy's girl - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my grandfather asked me why the broccoli I served for dinner was white. I told him it was cauliflower. He would't believe me, accused me of being a Russian spy, and stormed out. FML

#20461359
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31403) - you deserved it (2794)

On 01/15/2013 at 7:58pm - misc - by veggieluver (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend yet again decided to act like Edward Cullen from Twilight, and got his friend to act like Jacob. Every time they're around, my boyfriend always looks stoned and constipated, and his friend is shirtless. I feel like I'm in a shitty romance movie. FML

#20460771
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41140) - you deserved it (7190)

On 01/15/2013 at 1:57pm - love - by Bella (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out that my son told my daughter at some point that "real" name for Hershey's Kisses is "blowjobs." I found this out because at kindergarten she was asked what her favorite food was. The teacher wasn't happy when she called me. FML

#20452458
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31478) - you deserved it (2658)

On 01/10/2013 at 7:51pm - kids - by Grant - United States

Today, a friend informed me that my dog's name means "penis" in Greek. I live in a predominantly Greek neighbourhood, and apparently I've been screaming for "dong" every evening for the past 3 years. No wonder they don't talk to me much. FML

#20405418
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30041) - you deserved it (8579)

On 12/18/2012 at 10:30am - misc - by Dog_Lover (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he'd rather play the new Assassin's Creed game or have a night of sex with me. He started crying from indecision. FML

#20176354
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34316) - you deserved it (10923)

On 11/24/2012 at 8:54am - intimacy - by ladylol (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, my school's 6'2, 270-pound, 375-pound bench-pressing football superstar knocked me unconscious in one hit. With a dodgeball. FML

#18844690
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30098) - you deserved it (3309)

On 01/18/2012 at 2:57pm - health - by Shameful (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was walking to the bus stop when someone slapped an innocent person in the face with a fish. I was that innocent person. FML

#18812835
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31843) - you deserved it (3388)

On 01/15/2012 at 5:24am - misc - by lolwtfbbq444 - Australia

Today, during swimming in PE, I kept noticing a stinging feeling on my scrotum. Every time I jumped into the water I would feel a sharp stab. After the full hour of hell, I went to the bathroom and looked in my new trunks. The designer had left their sewing needle in the crotch netting. FML

#18809719
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38142) - you deserved it (4316)

On 01/14/2012 at 10:07pm - health - by CantPublish - United States

Today, it's Friday the 13th. I've never been superstitious, and I figured it would be a normal day, that is until my hot water heater exploded and rained water into my downstairs neighbour's apartment for two hours before anyone noticed. FML

#18795817
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21366) - you deserved it (2004)

On 01/13/2012 at 1:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my six-year-old got in an argument with my four-year-old. I told them to go outside. The next thing I know, my son was standing in front of his sister's burning Barbie's Malibu Dream House, singing "Burn Baby Burn" and cackling madly. FML

#17884513
422 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32803) - you deserved it (9217)

On 10/02/2011 at 3:27am - kids - by TraumatizedMother (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML

#17767423
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29513) - you deserved it (8248)

On 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm - kids - by awesomekidsmum - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that my German wasn't as great as I thought it was. Trying to give directions to some German tourists, I tried to say, "I hope I don't get you lost." Turns out I actually said something closer to, "I hope I don't seduce you." FML

#17388195
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23293) - you deserved it (5618)

On 08/06/2011 at 3:10pm - misc - by lostforwords (woman) - Ireland (Tipperary)

Today, while walking home from work, a young teenage girl ran up behind me and dumped a carton of milk on my head. She said, "The cow master baptizes you!" and then ran in the opposite direction, cackling madly. FML

#17301663
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33585) - you deserved it (3653)

On 07/29/2011 at 8:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I noticed that after a month of using my gel, it never seems to empty. I then found out my older brother and his friends had been pumping their man-juice into it. FML

#14838014
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68158) - you deserved it (6266)

On 02/04/2011 at 9:08am - intimacy - by theish -



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