CessOMG

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CessOMG

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 5 July 1992 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 21620
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About CessOMG : Princess of the b!tches.

CessOMG's page activity

Visits<b>MaFioso13</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 9:11pm<b>maddiiee00</b> - the 05/11/2013 at 11:31am

CessOMG's FML badges

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50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

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CessOMG's favorite FMLs

Today, I was feeling really down, so I texted my boyfriend, hoping to get some emotional support. He texted me back twenty minutes later, asking for nude pictures. FML

by Anonymous / 08/13/2012 at 2:48pm / United Kingdom (York) / Intimacy

Today, I was fooling around on Omegle, when I came across a guy who claimed he could suck himself off. I was doubtful, but morbidly curious, so I told him to prove it. Turns out he could. Before I could close the browser window in horror, my dad walked in and got a good look too. FML

by didntevenknow / 08/13/2012 at 11:06am / Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur) / Intimacy

Today, while out at dinner with my boyfriend, I accidentally ripped out my tampon picking a wedgie. FML

by brooke / 08/13/2012 at 12:45am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I invited my girlfriend over to a family lunch, planning to propose to her at just the right moment. My family was in on it, including my apparently disapproving mom, who kept causing a scene to grab my girlfriend's attention every time I went to pull out the ring. FML

by jake / 08/12/2012 at 11:49am / United States (Oregon) / Love

Today, I found the perfect opportunity to throw my husband a surprise party since he thought I was away on a business trip. He came home with a hooker. Surprise! FML

by happybirthday / 08/12/2012 at 1:49am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, I was digging in my lawn, trying to ignore the suspicious glances coming from my nosy fuckball of a neighbor. When he asked what I was doing, I replied with dripping sarcasm, that I was digging up the schoolkids I killed last year. Fifteen minutes later, the cops he called arrived. FML

by diggingaplotforone / 08/11/2012 at 7:47pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, at work, I was forced to nod and smile as a pregnant, fifteen-year-old, brain-dead Jersey Shore wannabe cussed me out for being rude by using words from a "foreign language" during our conversation. I used the word "pretentious." FML

by mikeissad / 08/11/2012 at 3:37pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I went out with a friend to grab some food and we were served by this really cute and fun waiter. Stepping out of my comfort zone and deciding to do something crazy, I left my phone number on the bill. I got home only to realize that I forgot to pay the bill. FML

by Anonymous / 08/09/2012 at 7:39am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I found one of my mom's old diaries that dated back to my infant days. I couldn't help but read a little. I'm now in great concern over how many times my mom wrote that she wanted to dunk me in the toilet or throw me against a wall. FML

by Anonymous / 08/09/2012 at 12:19am / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found one of my mom's old diaries that dated back to my infant days. I couldn't help but read a little. I'm now in great concern over how many times my mom wrote that she wanted to dunk me in the toilet or throw me against a wall. FML

by Anonymous / 08/09/2012 at 12:19am / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, my son thought it would be a great idea to spray a whole can of spray tan all over my freshly-painted white bathroom walls as an "experiment". He's 18. FML

by bellabreeze / 08/08/2012 at 11:29pm / United States (Maine) / Kids

Today, I found out that just because you express mail something, it doesn't mean the post office won't still lose it. What did they lose? My signed marriage license. We spent all that time and money to get married on the day of our choosing, and our marriage isn't even valid. FML

by mishkaroni / 08/08/2012 at 3:26pm / United States (California) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, it's my girlfriend's birthday. To celebrate, I spent the day with her and then took her out to a really nice dinner. She is currently giving me the silent treatment because I didn't write "happy birthday" on her Facebook wall. FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2012 at 1:15pm / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, out of habit, after scratching my balls, I then smelt my hand. It was at that moment I realized most of my gym was staring at me. FML

by FutureMarine3658 / 08/08/2012 at 10:00am / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous

Today, out of habit, after scratching my balls, I then smelt my hand. It was at that moment I realized most of my gym was staring at me. FML

by FutureMarine3658 / 08/08/2012 at 10:00am / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous