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Celeden

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Celeden

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  • Number of visits : 1384
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Celeden's page activity

Visits<b>thejonac</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 6:35am<b>ETwilleatyou</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 9:54pm<b>ThatOtherMegan</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 5:05pm<b>kingkobrastrikes</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 7:17pm<b>thejay907</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 8:03pm

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The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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Celeden's favorite FMLs

Today, I read my 10-year-old sister's diary. That's how I found out about her disturbingly detailed plan to murder me, make it look like suicide, date my boyfriend after helping him get over my death, then marry him. FML

#21395572
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16021) - you deserved it (1941)

On 04/18/2015 at 3:01am - kids - by Anonymus (woman) - Sweden

Today, I got into an argument with my racist brother after he opened his god damn stupid mouth in front of my girlfriend. He actually tried to convince me that he's not a racist, because one of his favorite types of porn is black girls getting fucked by white guys. FML

#21395531
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13436) - you deserved it (1131)

On 04/18/2015 at 12:57am - misc - by assault and imnotracistbuttery (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to have a cervical biopsy. The doctor said I would feel slight cramping as she scraped cells from inside the cervix. I guess by "slight cramping" she meant I would shit, throw up, and then pass out. FML

#21395495
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17088) - you deserved it (1084)

On 04/17/2015 at 11:15pm - health - by khaoslife - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my fiancé freaked when he noticed the tattoo on my wrist, and demanded to know when I got it. It was two years before we even started dating. FML

#21395494
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15686) - you deserved it (1189)

On 04/17/2015 at 11:12pm - love - by pandapantsMD (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was cuddling in bed with my boyfriend when he started squeezing me as if I were a ketchup bottle. He said he wanted my period to end quicker, and he honestly thought that would work. FML

Today, I was playing Monopoly with my extended family. When my wife came home, she kicked me out of the game and took all my money and property. When I said she couldn't do that, she said "Sure I can. It's called divorce." Everyone laughed. Now I'm bored as hell, watching everyone else play. FML

#21395300
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18714) - you deserved it (2191)

On 04/17/2015 at 4:43pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, while mowing my backyard, I carelessly ran over a fire ant hill. Thousands of tiny stinging insects blowing towards you while you're wearing shorts and a t-shirt is definitely not fun. FML

#21395171
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19186) - you deserved it (3453)

On 04/17/2015 at 11:27am - health - by Mitchellbassists (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was trying to make a good impression with my fiancé's friends. After a few hours, I thought all was going well. As I walked to the washroom, I heard, "So what disability does she have? No one can be like that without something wrong in their brain." FML

#21395050
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22708) - you deserved it (1908)

On 04/17/2015 at 2:24am - love - by apparently_disabled - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my husband told me he doesn't see the point in trying anymore, and that he no longer loves me. I was devastated. He stayed on the couch while I went to bed. Ten minutes later, he said, "Do you mind? I'm trying to sleep." and asked me to shut up. FML

Today, my husband came too soon during sex. He then tried to pretend it didn't happen and continued. He humped me with a half-erect noodle for about seven minutes before I finally called him out. FML

#21394468
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26452) - you deserved it (4223)

On 04/16/2015 at 1:04am - intimacy - by Evra (woman) - United States

Today, while cleaning my desk I found a stray gumball. I quickly popped it into my mouth only to discover with horror that it was a paintball. FML

#21394264
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14027) - you deserved it (27935)

On 04/15/2015 at 6:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my roommate wants to kick me out because I can't afford to pay my share of the rent this month. I couldn't afford to, because I had to pay for repairs to my car after my roommate got drunk, stole my keys, and crashed it into a street light. FML

#21394027
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31629) - you deserved it (2362)

On 04/15/2015 at 10:32am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, I told my younger brother that I'm a lesbian. Now he keeps asking me if I want to play rock, paper, vagina. FML

#21390758
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27201) - you deserved it (4549)

On 04/09/2015 at 4:24pm - love - by Sarah (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I started lactating. That would be fine if I had a kid. Or was pregnant. Or wasn't 16. FML



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