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Offline (the 01/18/2016 at 9:17am)



  • Town/Country : Dublin, Ireland
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 12 March 1986 (30 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1752
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Cautocracy : I am Glenn Coco

Cautocracy's page activity

Visits<b>AsharKhan</b> - the 09/20/2016 at 5:55am<b>HeroHog</b> - the 09/11/2016 at 6:13pm<b>ruudseriesx</b> - the 08/18/2016 at 3:46am<b>TimTheOwl</b> - the 08/04/2016 at 12:14am<b>boredSOLDIER</b> - the 07/18/2016 at 7:02pm<b>delichick</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 5:05pm<b>Xx_Slayer_xX</b> - the 07/10/2016 at 6:34pm<b>OPlonker</b> - the 06/23/2016 at 11:44am<b>billcosby31</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 10:53pm<b>piemasterp</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 2:26pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/18/2016 at 12:34am<b>hammer6969</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 8:14pm<b>tylanolisgrosd</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 10:49pm<b>URBeingLied2</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 3:13am<b>nozVail</b> - the 04/05/2016 at 4:14pm<b>MattNobles</b> - the 03/26/2016 at 1:21pm<b>darksouls4life</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 11:38pm<b>IronMan_Mk43</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 7:15pm

Fucked!<b>Xx_Slayer_xX</b> - the 07/11/2016 at 12:34am<b>AndesFults</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 5:11am<b>Blake77</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 11:52pm<b>orios105</b> - the 10/27/2015 at 4:33pm<b>cate18</b> - the 09/29/2015 at 7:03pm<b>_ely_foster_</b> - the 09/14/2015 at 12:13pm<b>Toonice45</b> - the 09/14/2015 at 2:52am<b>beingaloneisfun</b> - the 09/06/2015 at 6:12pm<b>kyle_s_97</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 6:14pm<b>faeryofshalott</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 12:03am<b>Mons</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 11:19pm<b>open_secrets</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 11:33am<b>apineapple</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 4:27pm<b>beeferjay</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 11:19pm<b>Codezlol</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 2:11pm<b>MichelleMaBelle</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 8:38pm<b>Shadowvoid</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 10:55pm<b>Anonypus</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 4:16pm

Cautocracy's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.


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Cautocracy's favorite FMLs

Today, at 2:00 am, my neighbor discovered "What Does The Fox Say?" He loves it. FML

by Anonymous / 03/17/2015 at 5:11pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized that while I've been the same minuscule height for the past five years, my feet won't stop growing. I'm 5 foot and a size 12. I look like a clown. FML

by Anonymous / 01/16/2015 at 5:15pm / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, I was told by my doctor I should start eating meat again after two years of vegetarianism, in an effort to be healthier. After horrid gas after my first turkey sandwich, I was told that my body no longer has the enzymes to digest meat. My efforts to be healthy crippled my stomach. FML

by skollasch / 09/25/2014 at 2:21am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I was stuck in heavy traffic. Bored, I looked to my left and noticed someone who seemed to be asleep at the wheel. After staring for a bit, wondering how people can be so negligent, I ended up hitting the car in front of me. FML

by 2013bchan41 / 07/18/2014 at 10:22pm / United States (New York) / Transportation

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, the deranged idiot that I am defending in court went completely nuts and told the judge that I am the guy who planned the whole armed robbery that he is on trial for. FML

by zl5 / 07/04/2014 at 7:17pm / New Zealand (Wellington) / Work

Today, I met my boyfriend's adoptive family. There was his mom and several brothers, one of whom tried to hit on me. They tried to convince my boyfriend to break up with me, and his mom told me I'll probably get knocked up by the brother who hit on me. FML

by Anonymous / 03/01/2014 at 1:09am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, I was singing while driving through the car park. I blacked out trying to hit a high note, and ended up bashing into another car. FML

by Anonymous / 02/17/2014 at 12:43pm / United States (Illinois) / Money

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

by MissYouPieceOfSkin / 11/27/2013 at 3:44am / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, I was delivering pizza. When I went up to the front door, an elderly lady answered. She was wearing a floral dress that went down to her shins and had a Nicolas Cage mask on with eye holes cut out. When I glanced behind her, I saw her cats had them too. FML

by nicholascageonyourface / 06/09/2013 at 1:13am / United States (Nebraska) / Miscellaneous

Today, at karate, my sparring partner thought it was completely okay to surprise kick me in the vagina. When he saw me doubled over in pain, he was completely surprised. Apparently, he thought that it wouldn't hurt, because I have no penis. FML

by Mayyouneverfindpleasureinavagina / 06/01/2013 at 12:31am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I was lying in bed with my girlfriend, when she reached over and twisted my nipples to the point of tears. I'm still not sure what in the name of Dawkins I did to deserve that. FML

by SoreNips / 04/12/2013 at 7:57pm / United Kingdom (Essex) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I'm too "high maintenance". And that's because I ask him to use condoms when we have sex, and I refuse to invite my friends over for threesomes. I don't know why I'm not actually glad we are broken up. FML

by kat124ever / 01/07/2013 at 3:35am / United States (Armed Forces Europe, Middle East) / Love

Today, my girlfriend noticed that I looked upset and asked me what was wrong. I told her I was sexually frustrated. Her response? "What are you telling me for?" FML

by Anonymous / 09/03/2012 at 5:45am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents. My dad turns around and says he was expecting him to have a guide dog. This is why I don't have much confidence in myself. FML

by hitnmiss66 / 05/27/2012 at 8:31pm / United Kingdom (Birmingham) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was out clubbing, when some bloke at the bar started trying to pick fights with everyone. Trying to defuse the situation with humour, I said, "I used to be a tough guy like you. Then I took an arrow in the knee." The next thing I know, I have a broken nose. FML

by Anonymous / 12/23/2011 at 9:49pm / Australia / Health