Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

CattyMcEwwen

Offline (24 hours ago) | Search for a member

CattyMcEwwen

5Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 26 June 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 518
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About CattyMcEwwen : I'm very bubbly and always up for a chat if you want to message me :) I'm openly bisexual and my favourite band is Papa Roach :) I also love to edit pictures :P

CattyMcEwwen's page activity

Visits<b>angiotensin</b> - 2 hours ago<b>Vanillanougat</b> - 3 hours ago<b>Crystal4</b> - 8 hours ago<b>anonymous188</b> - 12 hours ago<b>hard_candy</b> - 15 hours ago<b>ZY1431</b> - 15 hours ago<b>10nachoman10</b> - 15 hours ago<b>fmlnjd2013</b> - 17 hours ago<b>Manosapo</b> - yesterday at 5:38pm<b>HunterHimself</b> - yesterday at 4:35pm<b>CoGhostRider</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 12:44pm<b>mk1hate1my1job1</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 8:11am<b>Mahak1099</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 12:37pm<b>Dodopy</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 5:33pm<b>NodakN8V</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 11:20pm<b>Deadpool47</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 9:05pm<b>jogihoppa8343</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 1:48pm<b>Miizuo</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 3:01am

Liked!<b>anonymous188</b> - 6 hours ago<b>NodakN8V</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 4:36am<b>ironfey</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 1:16pm<b>cameronaka</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 5:03am<b>Manosapo</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 12:32am

CattyMcEwwen's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of CattyMcEwwen's badges

CattyMcEwwen's favorite FMLs

Today, after 2 years together, my boyfriend finally proposed. I excitedly said yes. Just as we began to kiss, my half crazed cat ran in, dropped a half eaten bird at our feet, and promptly threw up on the carpet. FML

#14779730
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26482) - you deserved it (4693)

On 01/30/2011 at 9:34pm - animals - by birdguts (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I had a stranger scream at me that I was a whore and I was trying to steal her boyfriend. She then said my full name, stating my previous hair colour, my recent activities and that her boyfriend had been my year nine dance partner. I officially have a stalker. FML

#14728347
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36331) - you deserved it (3225)

On 01/27/2011 at 2:17am - love - by dadum (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML

#14610613
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40785) - you deserved it (26850) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I'm at work as a security guard. At a morgue. Why am I here? FML

#13893197
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25898) - you deserved it (5460)

On 11/18/2010 at 10:04pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while talking with my girlfriend about dating, I learned that she has had more girlfriends than I have. FML

#13634710
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29825) - you deserved it (5887)

On 10/29/2010 at 1:48am - intimacy - by ohmylordy (man) - United States (California)

Today, in my college class, our teacher asked us what we wanted to do when we get out of college. I guess being a U.S. Marine gets you a lecture for the whole class to hear that I'm a war hungry pig, and should get a real job that requires a brain. My job field is Aircraft repair. FML

#13506521
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32122) - you deserved it (3933)

On 10/19/2010 at 12:21am - misc - by S3R1AL K1LL3R X - United States

Today, I got grounded because I didn't go to my dog's birthday party. FML

#13465366
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30699) - you deserved it (6733)

On 10/15/2010 at 11:06pm - misc - by jacky tu - United States (California)

Today, in math class, I got an answer "wrong." The teacher yelled at me, then he realized that my answer was correct. Then he yelled at me for not correcting him. FML

#13375159
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30490) - you deserved it (2725)

On 10/09/2010 at 4:22am - misc - by jessii - United States (New York)

Today, I discovered a bat in my new apartment. I found him in my shoe... with my foot. FML

#12583063
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32276) - you deserved it (3228)

On 08/17/2010 at 1:09pm - misc - by Bruce (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I discovered that I'm allergic to band-aids. I now have a band-aid shaped rash around a tiny cut on my leg. Oh the irony. FML

#10884107
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25234) - you deserved it (3581)

On 05/31/2010 at 11:43am - health - by twnty1 (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got sent to detention for saying, "that's what she said" after a girl in my class said, "push a little harder" while disecting a frog. FML

#7894652
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28691) - you deserved it (23691)

On 02/05/2010 at 12:01am - misc - by eemp - Sent from mobile version

Today, my mom revealed to me that when I was in Preschool, I used to get caught in the bathroom with little boys while I was feeling their "no no" area. I was giving hand jobs to boys before I could read. FML

#6768891
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28843) - you deserved it (7004)

On 12/15/2009 at 9:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that me and my best friend are both pregnant. We live together, and both had one night stands with the same guy. Now we are going to be each raising his children in the same house while he has decided to "not get involved" and move to a different state. FML

#6579311
387 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18129) - you deserved it (74685)

On 12/03/2009 at 1:55am - kids - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, when approaching a stop light on my motorcycle, I went to extend my left leg as usual to balance when stopped. Apparently my shoelace loop got wrapped around the shift lever and "tied" my shoe to the bike. It's hard to look cool when you fall over for no apparent reason at a stoplight. FML

#5682176
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32209) - you deserved it (7010)

On 10/06/2009 at 1:33pm - misc - by Crotch_Rocket_Rider (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I saw a YouTube video of a guy scratching a knife and a screwdriver on his iPod, and at the end he showed how there were no scratches and the screen was still clean. I took my iPod touch and did the same with a knife. It didn't work. FML

#5355612
476 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19408) - you deserved it (240942)

On 09/19/2009 at 5:36pm - misc - by MgmEboy (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: