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Cassowary_lover

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Cassowary_lover

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 881
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Cassowary_lover : Awkward lass trapped in the 21st century. I love lots of music and vintage things.
Adsum.

Cassowary_lover's page activity

Visits<b>Patty410</b> - the 04/02/2014 at 8:11am<b>PierceTheSquidgy</b> - the 03/06/2014 at 6:44pm<b>rocker_chick105</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 3:59pm<b>drshn</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 6:23pm<b>arabe30</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 10:49pm<b>Sir_ND_Pity</b> - the 09/13/2013 at 2:58am<b>Afroninja4566</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 11:21pm<b>katnissmellark</b> - the 08/23/2013 at 12:31am<b>THE_Black_Jesus</b> - the 08/17/2013 at 1:26am<b>nreed32</b> - the 08/10/2013 at 10:40pm<b>mandacleary</b> - the 08/10/2013 at 9:49pm<b>steins</b> - the 08/04/2013 at 5:05am<b>WildWonder808</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 8:27pm<b>moondoggie</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 1:47am<b>salamander461</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 7:54pm<b>sweet0cheeks</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 10:20am<b>db32</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 9:28am<b>prollypoopin</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 7:25am

Cassowary_lover's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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Cassowary_lover's favorite FMLs

Today, my students presented their projects on genetics to the rest of the class. One student told the class that salted and unsalted peanuts were an example of genetic variation. She was serious. FML

#21076929
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41498) - you deserved it (4436)

On 03/03/2014 at 2:58pm - work - by Biologyfacepalm (woman) - United States

Today, I wanted to pretend to have a seizure so my baby sister could know when to call 911. When I fell down and started to pretend, she decided to drink my soda instead of helping me. FML

#21071750
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38039) - you deserved it (14903)

On 02/25/2014 at 10:50pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, at the grocery store, an elderly woman asked for help with some tea. I lent her a hand, spending a good twenty minutes reading different labels out loud until she found one she liked. After she was done, she handed me a pamphlet and said, "You're a nice girl. I hope you don't go to hell." FML

#21050005
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40746) - you deserved it (4366)

On 02/04/2014 at 1:16am - misc - by Lithiac - United States (Florida)

Today, while at a funeral for a distant family member, I was giving my condolences to the family. When one of them asked how I was doing, I replied with, "I'm still alive!", which is one of my standard responses due to being a cashier and being asked that question a hundred times a day. FML

Today, I finally finished making my daughter's wedding cake. When I checked on it later, I found a large slice had been cut out. I soon found out that my husband had instagrammed himself eating it, with the caption "#guiltypleasures". FML

#21046154
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47008) - you deserved it (4009)

On 01/31/2014 at 11:36am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I had an upset stomach all day at work. When lunch break came, I rushed to the bathroom. Just as I turned into an unstoppable human whoopie cushion, a co-worker walked in. He heard the entire arse symphony, and just asked "What the fuck, dude?!" as he left. FML

#21045407
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40867) - you deserved it (4440)

On 01/30/2014 at 5:46pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, my mother came over to visit, and my kids started excitedly telling her Christmas is coming soon. She freaked out, saying Christmas is a "Satanic holiday" and telling them that Santa is going to hell along with everyone who celebrates it. My children are now traumatized. FML

#20933801
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41153) - you deserved it (3229)

On 10/25/2013 at 7:20pm - kids - by Jane M (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my best friend went in for her scheduled mammogram, and I sent her a text saying, "How're your boobies?" It was only after I sent it that I realized I'd sent it to my history professor. FML

#20930198
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38714) - you deserved it (11496)

On 10/22/2013 at 12:47pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I heard crashing noises coming from my dining room. I got up to see what it was; my asshat cat was flinging himself at my chandelier. He'd figured out how to grab the ceiling fan from the other room, build momentum, and launch into my expensive chandelier. Hooray. FML

#20929956
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45077) - you deserved it (4771)

On 10/22/2013 at 5:12am - animals - by IamAflyingCat - United States

Today, I tried Ambien for the first time. I now have to apologize to most of my exes for excessively rambling emails about getting together for some naked Twister. FML

#20929399
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31503) - you deserved it (10610)

On 10/21/2013 at 8:12pm - health - by OutOfMyMind (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, the family upstairs decided to play basketball. Indoors. At 3am. FML

#20928702
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40222) - you deserved it (2759)

On 10/21/2013 at 9:06am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my son came home for the fifth time saying he didn't get the job, wondering what he did wrong. I looked at his resumé; under special skills was, "Keeping it real." Apparently he saw it in a movie and thought it would work. FML

#20928390
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40036) - you deserved it (4938)

On 10/21/2013 at 12:18am - kids - by Wheredigowrong - United States (Iowa)

Today, I got a call from my daughter’s school today. She had been telling the teacher, "I have a huge boner." Apparently, some of the kids at school told her it meant 'headache' and she's been saying it all day. FML

#20928358
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41342) - you deserved it (3169)

On 10/20/2013 at 11:51pm - kids - by momaaa1342 - United States (Illinois)

Today, my husband yelled from upstairs, "Babe! BABE, COME QUICK!" Terrified that something might have happened to our newborn daughter, I rushed up, only to find out he just wanted to show me that he'd learned how to spin a top on the tip of his penis without it falling. FML

#20908628
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48880) - you deserved it (6608)

On 10/05/2013 at 5:28pm - intimacy - by -____- (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my mom started getting ready for the Rapture. FML

#20906662
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33240) - you deserved it (2866)

On 10/03/2013 at 11:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)



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