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Carlyndra

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Carlyndra

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 10 June 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3355
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Carlyndra's page activity

Visits<b>D0M1N4T0R746</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 11:17pm<b>vixen_me</b> - the 12/17/2013 at 2:38am

Carlyndra's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of Carlyndra's badges

Carlyndra's favorite FMLs

Today, I managed to score a date for the first time in over a year, and was very nervous. When I was asked what I do for a living, I laughed nervously, and then blurted out, "Finger women." What I was trying to jokingly say was that I'm a gynecologist. FML

#20525332
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16236) - you deserved it (34659)

On 02/28/2013 at 2:57am - love - by notapervert - United States (California)

Today, my college started an internet "confessions" page. Out of curiosity I checked it out, only to find that it's full of some of the most disturbing stuff I've ever read. My schoolmates are either filthy as fuck or they are all pathological liars. Wonderful. FML

#20524030
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33106) - you deserved it (4649)

On 02/27/2013 at 2:17am - intimacy - by panicelement (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I finally made a Facebook account after being home-schooled my entire life. I friended people that I know and their friends, and subsequently sparked a debate on whether or not I exist. FML

#20523906
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27434) - you deserved it (3658)

On 02/27/2013 at 12:03am - misc - by thepokemonkid - United States (Connecticut)

Today, a German guy came into the place where I work. Eager to use the German that I'd learned from my immigrant mother and her family, I started a conversation. Things were going well until the term I grew up thinking meant "Africa" turned out to be racist, translating as "Ape Land." FML

#20523889
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27737) - you deserved it (3753)

On 02/26/2013 at 11:50pm - misc - by Jan (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, when my doctor told me I had symptoms of an STD, I had to repeatedly try to convince her I'm a 28-year-old virgin. Even as I left she still didn't believe me. FML

#20522701
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31052) - you deserved it (3347)

On 02/26/2013 at 3:21am - health - by Brook (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I got stuck in traffic when a shootout started somewhere behind. I lowered myself and suddenly a bullet punctured a hole in the rear screen. When I managed to get away, I called my wife in a panic. She didn't pick up so I sent her a text about what just happened. Her reply: "K". FML

#20522482
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53756) - you deserved it (3913)

On 02/25/2013 at 11:33pm - intimacy - by n3ov (man) - Pakistan (Islamabad)

Today, I gave birth to my daughter in a hospital corridor. The nurse who took me to my room afterward tried to comfort me by saying there've been worse incidents; she said that two years ago, a lady gave birth in the parking lot. That was me too. FML

#20521872
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56159) - you deserved it (4520) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/25/2013 at 2:47pm - health - by laprochainefoisjerestealamaison (woman) - France (Languedoc-Roussillon)

Today, I realized that the "eyelash curling brush" that my best friend found in my old bathroom drawer was actually a stick used for cleaning food out of my sister's braces. I used that thing for years. FML

#20519962
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23503) - you deserved it (12606)

On 02/24/2013 at 9:30am - misc - by curly_eyelashes - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my now ex-boyfriend called me out after I spelt "realised" with an S instead of a Z. It wouldn't have been so bad, if we weren't both British, if he hadn't called me an "illiterate idiot", and if he hadn't muttered "family of morons" when my mum backed me up. FML

#20519170
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28600) - you deserved it (4415)

On 02/23/2013 at 6:18pm - love - by singleandthankful (woman) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I lost a bet with my friends. I had to go to the super market and buy a copy of 50 Shades of Grey along with a cucumber. The cashier was trying so hard not to laugh while ringing me up. FML

#20516035
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39167) - you deserved it (10346)

On 02/21/2013 at 8:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, my son asked me if the short films I write are for little kids or for adults. Since I write horror-filled films, I said it was for adults. He went and told his teacher that I made "adult films". FML

#20514612
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34349) - you deserved it (4673)

On 02/20/2013 at 7:01am - kids - by Laila - United States

Today, I walked into my dad straightening my dog's fur. His excuse? The dog needed to feel pretty. FML

#20513110
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29748) - you deserved it (4018)

On 02/19/2013 at 2:01am - animals - by xtammyle - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I met my new class. There are two Kevin Smiths. Neither will agree to a nickname, they have the same hair color, and their middle names both start with J. They have told me to call them Kevin 1 and Kevin 2. They both want to be Kevin 1. FML

#20512577
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38585) - you deserved it (3062)

On 02/18/2013 at 7:26pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I stayed in a hotel near the college I was applying for a scholarship. We were eating breakfast and there were some other applicants in the breakfast room. As we walked away, my mother yelled, "My daughter's gonna get this scholarship so there's no reason for you muddafuckas to show up." FML

#20511941
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36220) - you deserved it (3196)

On 02/18/2013 at 9:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)



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