CaptainPickles72

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CaptainPickles72

6Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 11 September 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 9268
  • Number of comments : 317
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About CaptainPickles72 : You like me, and I, like you, like me!

10/10 people say I'm funny, and they also say 99% of statistics are made up. These people seem to know a lot! You know what that means!? I'm fucking funny!!

Your words say no, but your kicks to the groin say yes!

I like to joke around a lot, though I wouldn't say I'm an entirely funny person. I do have my moments though! If you wanna message me and joke around or just wanna ask a question or two, feel free to! I'm a nice person and love getting to know people.

I would write some more, but I'm too busy giving back to the community via the drugs I sell them.

CaptainPickles72's page activity

Visits<b>Joshawott14</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 12:37pm<b>sandormatyi</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 2:04pm<b>A_Chacon</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 2:08am<b>WJM505</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 9:24pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 5:31pm<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 2:33pm<b>M3DO</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 6:09am<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 12/19/2015 at 1:53am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 12/16/2015 at 8:37am<b>ellie_215</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 6:49pm<b>besosforme</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 2:43am<b>Kitty1811</b> - the 11/17/2015 at 3:14pm<b>ASubtleHuman</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 9:56am<b>Cindale_87</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 4:33pm<b>eski2015</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 1:06am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 5:05pm<b>melons</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 8:11pm<b>oops6663</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 1:32pm

Fucked!<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 8:33pm<b>ASubtleHuman</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 2:57pm<b>eski2015</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 7:06am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 11:05pm<b>evan4guitar</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 5:37pm<b>Zoey_M</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 10:56pm

CaptainPickles72's FML badges

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

See all of CaptainPickles72's badges

CaptainPickles72's favorite FMLs

Today, I snuck into my boyfriend's house because I have an extra key. I snuck into his bed with sleep with him and noticed how soft his skin was. Turns out I had been feeling up the girl he was sleeping with and he was in the bathroom. FML

by Anonymous / 08/16/2009 at 7:33pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I literally stopped traffic. I was crossing the street and a butterfly landed on me. Being phobic of butterflies, I had a panic attack in the middle of the road. Oh, and I am 17, captain of our football team, and in very good shape. My girlfriend laughed the hardest. FML

by Butterflyguy / 08/14/2009 at 1:10pm / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Animals

Today, I went to a funeral for my coworker's father. While there, my dad's cell phone rang and he left to answer it. I turned to my brother and said, "I can't believe he brought his cell phone!" He whispered, "I can't believe he's got coverage. This is a dead zone!" I laughed loudly. At a funeral. FML

by Anonymous / 07/26/2009 at 1:00pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized my new kitten is the spawn of the devil. It decided to go get itself stuck in a tree. I tried to climb up to rescue it. But it kept climbing higher. I was about to grab the cat when I fell. The cat then jumped down and started purring. FML

by WearingOff / 07/13/2009 at 11:03pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I was at Target with my mom and we finished purchasing our items. We had gotten a fan so I said, "This thing is too big to fit in." First thing my mom yells? "THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!" and starts laughing hysterically in front of the entire store. FML

by embarrassed / 07/12/2009 at 2:25pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to go through the embarrassment and pain of telling my parents I was pregnant. I took the test and it came out positive and I was freaking out. I got grounded for the rest of the year and they're really disappointed in me. Five minutes ago, I got my period. FML

by Anonymous / 07/11/2009 at 9:26pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my girlfriend of two years broke up with me because she wants to "become" a lesbian. I also learned that she's coming to my house for dinner tonight. My sister is her date. FML

by fd_uplife / 07/05/2009 at 12:46pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, I found out that my boyfriend is cheating on me, with the same guy I was cheating on him with. FML

by shandrith / 07/03/2009 at 10:16am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was at the movies with my mom and dad, and the preview to my "My Sisters Keeper" came on. The trailer started out with "Most babies are accidents..." Right as that line was finished my mom elbowed me and laughed. FML

by A2 / 06/28/2009 at 2:12am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, my attractive boss sat me down in the break room to say how much she appreciated how much work I've been doing despite being a temp. She was wearing a skirt, and I couldn't take my eyes off her legs. She then patted me on the leg and said "Good Talk". It wasn't my leg. FML

by EmployeeOfTheMonth / 06/27/2009 at 3:03am / United States (California) / Work

Today, I was at my job at an old folks home, and I was cleaning off a table when one old lady looks up at me and says "I've been a dirty dirty girl" in a seductive tone, I thought she meant about the table so I said "yes you have" then she winked at me, I walked away fast. FML

by Anonymous / 06/12/2009 at 3:53am / Canada (Alberta) / Work

Today, I was at the mall with my mom. She was pissing me off, so I started screaming at her and causing a scene. I ended up falling all the way down the up escalator. Everyone saw and people clapped. FML

by ouchers / 06/11/2009 at 3:49pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking on a path through a park by myself. I glanced at the ground and saw a shadow behind me. Thinking of an attacker, I screamed as loud as I could and began flailing my arms to ward him off. Turns out, it was a jogger. He had to stop due to his uncontrollable laughter. FML

by paranoid / 06/06/2009 at 12:43am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I witnessed a horrible car accident and was interviewed by the local news. During the interview I said, "It was terrible. It was like watching a silent movie... but there was sound!" The interview has been aired 6 times. FML

by LadyChristina25 / 06/04/2009 at 9:07pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Miscellaneous

Today, I rode my bike to the grocery store. I left my bike on the small bike rack they have outside the door. When I came out 5 minutes later I found someone had tied their enormous, growling German Shepard to the same rack. I had to wait for the owner to come out who then laughed at me. FML

by j / 06/03/2009 at 11:36pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous