CaptainPickles72

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CaptainPickles72

6Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 11 September 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 8787
  • Number of comments : 317
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About CaptainPickles72 : You like me, and I, like you, like me!

10/10 people say I'm funny, and they also say 99% of statistics are made up. These people seem to know a lot! You know what that means!? I'm fucking funny!!

Your words say no, but your kicks to the groin say yes!

I like to joke around a lot, though I wouldn't say I'm an entirely funny person. I do have my moments though! If you wanna message me and joke around or just wanna ask a question or two, feel free to! I'm a nice person and love getting to know people.

I would write some more, but I'm too busy giving back to the community via the drugs I sell them.

CaptainPickles72's page activity

Visits<b>WJM505</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 9:24pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 5:31pm<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 2:33pm<b>M3DO</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 6:09am<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 12/19/2015 at 1:53am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 12/16/2015 at 8:37am<b>ellie_215</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 6:49pm<b>besosforme</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 2:43am<b>Kitty1811</b> - the 11/17/2015 at 3:14pm<b>ASubtleHuman</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 9:56am<b>Cindale_87</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 4:33pm<b>eski2015</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 1:06am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 5:05pm<b>melons</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 8:11pm<b>oops6663</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 1:32pm<b>weepul36</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 2:55pm<b>justindrew14</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 12:38pm<b>G_man19</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 1:10pm

Fucked!<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 8:33pm<b>ASubtleHuman</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 2:57pm<b>eski2015</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 7:06am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 11:05pm<b>evan4guitar</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 5:37pm<b>Zoey_M</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 10:56pm

CaptainPickles72's FML badges

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

See all of CaptainPickles72's badges

CaptainPickles72's favorite FMLs

Today, I broke my little toe. It got stuck in my panties as I struggled to get a leg through. FML

by Sica / 03/15/2012 at 3:28pm / France / Health

Today, I was calling my husband while driving. While the phone rang, I farted. As soon as the horrid smell hit my nose, my husband answered. I panicked and hung up quickly, thinking to myself how embarrassed I was because he could smell it. I'm an idiot. FML

by StinkyandStupid / 03/15/2012 at 1:49pm / United States / Transportation

Today, I was the 10th caller on a radio show. I answered the question correctly. The DJ informed I won a free air guitar of my choosing. I yelled with excitement over the air. The DJ then instructed me how to use my new air guitar. FML

by h4rdy / 03/09/2012 at 11:55am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I accidentally dropped a sculpture at college, and it broke. Some weirdo wearing a pink cape and a fake moustache bitched me out and told me not to be such an attention-seeking drama queen. FML

by Anonymous / 02/08/2012 at 12:55pm / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML

Today, I was left at the altar. For the second time. By the same man. FML

by givingup / 01/30/2012 at 12:37am / United States (North Carolina) / Love

Today, I found out that my wife purposely eats peanut butter and jelly sandwiches to get out of kissing me. I'm deathly allergic to peanuts. FML

by Allergic / 01/24/2012 at 12:31pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I took my kids to visit their grandma. At one point while playing, my youngest said "shit", so I admonished her. My mom snorted and told me to "stop being such a little bitch", because it will make my kids into "lame prisses like their mother". FML

by gloria77 / 01/23/2012 at 6:26pm / United States / Kids

Today, my boyfriend referred to his penis as 'The Eye of Sauron'. It didn't help when he pulled down his foreskin, pointed it in my direction and said 'I see you'. FML

by anon / 01/18/2012 at 1:29pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Afterwards, he said he was in love with me and that he wants to be with me forever. It was also at this time I realised that I can't stand him. FML

by Anonymous / 01/09/2012 at 10:30pm / Australia / Intimacy

Today, I was on the train listening to my iPod on shuffle. The "Oompa Loompa" song came on, and slightly amused, I started humming it. It wasn't until I noticed that the man next to me was a midget that I understood the horrified looks I was getting. FML

by lorahayes / 01/05/2012 at 1:39pm / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was diagnosed with a clogged milk gland. I am not, nor have ever been, pregnant and therefore have also never breastfed. This condition is caused by my boyfriend's over-active urge to suck on my nipples. I'm in horrible pain, and he won't stop laughing. FML

by Anonymous / 01/03/2012 at 6:07pm / United States (Arizona) / Health

Today, my dog started limping as we were walking home. I thought she'd hurt herself, so I picked her up and carried her home. Once we arrived, I put her down, at which point she ran around and played as if nothing had happened. I fell for my lazy dog's plan to get me to carry her home. FML

by vanessa560 / 01/03/2012 at 2:44pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job when she started crying. Despite my pleas for her to stop and attempts to comfort her, she insisted that she continue. I feel like a monster. FML

by Anonymous / 01/02/2012 at 12:30pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, while having sex, I told my boyfriend that I love him. I could feel him go soft inside me. FML

by KrissyBearr / 12/30/2011 at 8:36pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy