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Capt_Obvious

Offline (the 10/27/2014 at 6:27pm) | Search for a member

Capt_Obvious

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 14475
  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Capt_Obvious : Gamer, Grammar NAZI, Sarcastic . . . That's about all you need to know.

Capt_Obvious's page activity

Visits<b>jamaarlove</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 2:23am<b>taranoelr</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 12:15am<b>HarshD9619</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 5:01am<b>LuxTheSarcastic</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 1:44pm<b>Shamandalie89</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 3:31am<b>constipation</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 6:37pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 12:23pm<b>raven83</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 5:16pm<b>americanafrican</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 4:40pm<b>sleepwalker13</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 9:16am<b>Michaelmore</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 5:20am<b>pikawarriors</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 11:53pm<b>lochiamochia</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 10:21pm<b>katyliz91</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 9:45pm<b>Ghosty546</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 2:50am<b>mominzed</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 1:22am<b>Miss_Brii</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 8:08am<b>Anata</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 5:06am

Capt_Obvious's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of Capt_Obvious's badges

Capt_Obvious's favorite FMLs

Today, my mother thought it would be a good idea to tell me that I was conceived on an airplane toilet. FML

#18728247
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33977) - you deserved it (2928)

On 01/06/2012 at 6:16pm - intimacy - by Gemma - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, my therapist told me, "I'm sorry, but I'm not qualified to handle your level of instability." FML

#18725353
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39017) - you deserved it (4592)

On 01/06/2012 at 11:16am - health - by Ixi_the_pixie - United States

Today, I was boarding a plane and an elderly woman asked if I could put her carry on into the overhead bin. Eager to help, I energetically lifted her bag up, and smacked her in the face with it. FML

#18722642
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31319) - you deserved it (6062)

On 01/06/2012 at 12:47am - misc - by plantfood - United States

Today, I had an upset stomach. I lay down in bed with a bucket nearby just in case. Later on, the urge to vomit overcame me, and I puked into the bucket. I realised too late that my cat had chosen to sleep in it. He jumped out and spread vomit all over my apartment. FML

#18716901
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41289) - you deserved it (5354) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/05/2012 at 3:40pm - animals - by Fat_abott - France

Today, I was on the train listening to my iPod on shuffle. The "Oompa Loompa" song came on, and slightly amused, I started humming it. It wasn't until I noticed that the man next to me was a midget that I understood the horrified looks I was getting. FML

#18716043
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36860) - you deserved it (9809)

On 01/05/2012 at 1:39pm - misc - by lorahayes (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I was on the train listening to my iPod on shuffle. The "Oompa Loompa" song came on, and slightly amused, I started humming it. It wasn't until I noticed that the man next to me was a midget that I understood the horrified looks I was getting. FML

#18716043
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36860) - you deserved it (9809)

On 01/05/2012 at 1:39pm - misc - by lorahayes (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I received a ticket for not having my headlights on. The cop who pulled me over had a broken headlight. FML

#18715182
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30062) - you deserved it (4712)

On 01/05/2012 at 10:56am - money - by FML - United States (Florida)

Today, after months of dating, I asked my boyfriend if he wanted to take things to the next level. He told me that he couldn't have sex with me because of his religious beliefs. I would've been fine with this if it weren't for the fact that I know he and his family are all atheists. FML

#18710247
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36524) - you deserved it (4450)

On 01/04/2012 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by Anon - United States (California)

Today, I had to ask my girlfriend to please stop telling me about her ex's penis. FML

#18705552
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48455) - you deserved it (4564)

On 01/04/2012 at 11:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my boyfriend informed me that my vagina reminds him of ham. But that's okay, because ham is his favorite food. FML

#18704788
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34316) - you deserved it (5355)

On 01/04/2012 at 7:32am - intimacy - by thankzbabe (woman) - United States

Today, I was diagnosed with a clogged milk gland. I am not, nor have ever been, pregnant and therefore have also never breastfed. This condition is caused by my boyfriend's over-active urge to suck on my nipples. I'm in horrible pain, and he won't stop laughing. FML

#18698902
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36667) - you deserved it (6051)

On 01/03/2012 at 6:07pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I tried exercising. My whole house shook. FML

#18691343
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27998) - you deserved it (13817)

On 01/02/2012 at 10:47pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, while I was in the break room at work, one of my coworkers walked in on me playing with my animal crackers, complete with animal noises. Now, the entire department won't stop teasing me and calling me Tarzan. FML

#18687343
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13890) - you deserved it (35179)

On 01/02/2012 at 3:55pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job when she started crying. Despite my pleas for her to stop and attempts to comfort her, she insisted that she continue. I feel like a monster. FML

#18685700
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48172) - you deserved it (7593)

On 01/02/2012 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was pushed over and robbed in a parking lot by a man in an ugly Christmas sweater. When I looked up, I was too distracted by the sweater to even look at his face. FML

#18681564
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29951) - you deserved it (8403)

On 01/02/2012 at 12:40am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)



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