About Capt_Oblivious : You cannot even begin to imagine the immensity of the fuck I do not give.
Want to know more? Contact me, it may just enrich your life. But probably not by much.
100 kick ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
Today, I got dumped by my boyfriend because he is tired of everyone giving him shit about my ginger hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35219) - you deserved it (5842)
On 08/19/2011 at 6:38am - love - by ginger (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, I woke up to my roommate sniffing my underwear. He said he was checking if they were clean, so he could borrow them later. Which may have been reasonable, if I weren't still sleeping in them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35042) - you deserved it (2072)
On 08/19/2011 at 2:32am - intimacy - by leftwardfoil (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I went to register for college classes with my mom. Upon leaving, my mom confessed to me that she thinks I will get pregnant and drop out before my freshman year is over. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19910) - you deserved it (2531)
On 08/19/2011 at 12:03am - misc - by ms_nothing (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was sitting in my cubicle at work, nursing a hangover, and thinking how stupid I was for getting so shit-faced last night. I then realized that I was voicing my thoughts out loud, and the whole office had gone quiet, listening to me castigate myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7940) - you deserved it (23953)
On 08/18/2011 at 3:42am - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was dancing with the 4 hottest girls I've ever seen at a club, and I fainted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25030) - you deserved it (6006)
On 08/18/2011 at 1:18am - health - by gb - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I drunk texted a guy I like. We'd met at an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6827) - you deserved it (25008)
On 08/17/2011 at 7:37pm - love - by Username - United States
Today, I went to court expecting to walk out a free man. Turns out my misdemeanor offense couldn't compare to the crime I committed when I walked into the court house with a switchblade tucked into my shoe. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5897) - you deserved it (70976)
On 08/17/2011 at 2:27pm - misc - by Tom - United States (Texas)
Today, I got a flat tire in the middle of nowhere. I called AAA, and they said it would take 2 hours to get there. They called 2 hours later saying they got a flat tire and would be there in another 2 hours. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31946) - you deserved it (2488)
On 08/17/2011 at 12:45pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)
Today, I was on my back patio talking with my husband. It got dark outside, and I saw something shuffling in the back yard. I freaked out so bad that I went to run inside, only to fly face-first into the screen door. Turns out the shuffling was from a baby rabbit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8423) - you deserved it (19873)
On 08/16/2011 at 3:27pm - misc - by scaredscreenless - United States
Today, my mom was convinced that the lawn gnomes we bought from Wal-Mart were secretly conspiring to kill us. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23590) - you deserved it (2473)
On 08/16/2011 at 2:52am - misc - by Stevie - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my little brother proudly informed me that he found a way to suck pool water up his asshole. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27213) - you deserved it (2045)
On 08/16/2011 at 2:22am - kids - by Gross... (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I was walking to get ice-cream with my boyfriend. When we were ordering our cone, the girl who was scooping it said to my boyfriend, "Hey I know you! You're the one who slept with my sister-in-law the other night." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42317) - you deserved it (3376)
On 08/09/2011 at 12:08pm - love - by the2girls - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my girlfriend of 4 years broke up with me. She took everything, including the kidney I gave her a year ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48886) - you deserved it (4292)
On 08/09/2011 at 10:50am - love - by aliixmaee - United States
Today, I finally started doing cardio and getting in shape. What motivated me to do it? Watching a zombie movie. The slow ones bite the dust first. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21624) - you deserved it (7042)
On 08/03/2011 at 12:55pm - health - by indierocklove - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was feeling a little naughty, so I put on a sexy outfit, laid down on the hood of my boyfriend's car, and waited for him to find me. When he came into the garage and saw me, he freaked out and bitched at me, because I "could have dented the chassis". FML
I agree, your life sucks (28307) - you deserved it (12840)
On 07/31/2011 at 6:19pm - intimacy - by username (woman) - United States (New York)
Friday 24 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
