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CantusVulpis

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CantusVulpis

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2924
  • Number of comments : 75
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About CantusVulpis : My name is Bay, I read FML when I am bored, tired, or in an awkward situation. I think it would be fun to be on the FML team. :)
I'm big fan of Doctor Who, Legend of Zelda, Skyrim, Adventure Time, and BBC Sherlock.
Find me on Tumblr!
cantusvulpis.tumblr.com

CantusVulpis's page activity

Visits<b>weekendhero</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 1:03pm<b>Jaager</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 3:49pm<b>Drag0nb0rn</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 6:35pm<b>BigPeter</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 5:28am<b>manchesterUK</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 7:39am<b>uflorida21</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 3:37am<b>sma30135</b> - the 04/18/2014 at 1:38am<b>Laconic01</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 6:04pm<b>LiiaaBee</b> - the 03/28/2014 at 2:52pm<b>nialls_princess1</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 11:12pm<b>levodkamartini</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 11:22am<b>Calaraphea</b> - the 03/07/2014 at 1:35pm<b>Orion_Knight78</b> - the 02/24/2014 at 5:08pm<b>ariastyles12</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 8:25am<b>sammy1021</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 2:19pm<b>roeboat72</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 2:53pm<b>Liamc620</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 9:57am<b>149967</b> - the 11/27/2013 at 9:00pm

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CantusVulpis's favorite FMLs

Today, I gave my girlfriend a small stun gun I bought for her. She mentioned how she thought it was ''cute'', though it probably wouldn't help if someone was after her. She then put the tazer to my chest. When I woke up, she told me how it was my fault, for buying it for her. FML

#4414579
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43559) - you deserved it (12280)

On 08/09/2009 at 10:13pm - health - by Ducati (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was in the living room with my brother and his two older, hot friends when my mother walks out from the toilet and tells me, "Honey, if you sprinkle when you tinkle, be a sweetie wipe the seatie." Need I say more? FML

#3949576
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46905) - you deserved it (15743)

On 07/22/2009 at 5:48am - misc - by Mortified (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I realized my new kitten is the spawn of the devil. It decided to go get itself stuck in a tree. I tried to climb up to rescue it. But it kept climbing higher. I was about to grab the cat when I fell. The cat then jumped down and started purring. FML

#3731184
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40696) - you deserved it (8096)

On 07/13/2009 at 11:03pm - animals - by WearingOff (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to the gym to lift weights because my arm muscles are pathetic. In order to use a machine, I needed to pull out a knob to adjust the seat setting. After an embarassing struggle, a worker came over and helped me. Turns out I'm not even strong enough to adjust the seat settings. FML

#3440456
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34835) - you deserved it (6907)

On 07/02/2009 at 11:06pm - misc - by Heethersays (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my mother woke me up by saying "Good morning my sexually aggressive daughter. We're going to have an extremely uncomfortable conversation today." Our awkward talk consisted of her telling me that I'm a tease and am going to get raped. Why? She caught me making out with my boyfriend. FML

#3398607
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67978) - you deserved it (6484)

On 07/01/2009 at 3:33pm - intimacy - by wildthing (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I had a meeting at work with my board of directors for a potential promotion. When one of them told a joke, I politely let out an amused snort. Then, I noticed my director's white shirt and tie covered in red splatter. I nose bled all over the director of my company. FML

#2720820
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48312) - you deserved it (4179)

On 06/08/2009 at 2:51pm - work - by Marie (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I decided to use my mentor's advice. I told her I had been having some trouble controlling my anger, she told me to throw rocks at trees. I threw a rock at a tree, very hard. It bounced back hit me above the eye. I'm still pissed as shit. FML

#2238808
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51193) - you deserved it (18261)

On 05/24/2009 at 12:03pm - misc - by untitledentity (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I spent the whole day seeing how many licks it would take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop: 763. I'm 24. FML

#2209832
393 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49512) - you deserved it (21319)

On 05/23/2009 at 12:15pm - misc - by Tootsy_Roll_Pop (man) - United States

Today, I was at a restaurant when I heard a young girl telling her father she didn't think she was pretty. When I got up to leave, I walked past her table and told her she was beautiful. Her dad then punched me in the face. FML

#1737355
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60036) - you deserved it (14849)

On 05/07/2009 at 11:02pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I sang my signature tune at a karaoke bar - What A Wonderful World - and I thought I sounded my best yet. After my performance, I went outside to get some air. Then, I got assaulted in the parking lot and ended up going to the hospital. What a wonderful world indeed. FML

#1245192
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52375) - you deserved it (4953)

On 04/23/2009 at 12:42am - misc - by karaokestar (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, a girl-scout asked me to buy cookies, in front of Giant. She looked nice, so I bought 5 boxes from her. She took the money and went home with her mom. I opened the boxes when I got home and realized that the boxes just had rocks in them. I got scammed by a girl-scout. FML

#357552
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (213433) - you deserved it (35206)

On 03/15/2009 at 9:14pm - money - by twit (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I had my wisdom teeth pulled. There was a cyst behind one of them, and the dentist decided to extract it - except the Novocaine didn't reach that far back. I raised my hand like they said to do, and the dentist looked at me writing in pain and said, "No, you're fine." FML

#255362
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69943) - you deserved it (2880)

On 03/09/2009 at 9:03pm - health - by toothache (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, at a hard rock concert, a bunch of guys accidentally knocked down a port-a-potty while moshing. I was inside that port-a-potty. FML

#231694
157 comments


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