About CaliforniaErin : Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.
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CaliforniaErin's favorite FMLs
Today, I went to the store with my girlfriend. She needed to use the bathroom so I started looking at the books. It wasn't until the manager shot me a weird look that I realized I'd wandered down too far and was looking at bridal magazines, holding tampons, dog treats, and hair spray. FML
by Dv0829 / 10/21/2011 at 1:42am / United States (Utah) / Animals
by box bulge / 10/20/2011 at 9:24pm / China / Health
by sarah / 10/19/2011 at 3:36pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
by optimistic2628 / 10/19/2011 at 10:03am / United States / Kids
Today, I went to visit my grandpa. He has an easily excited dog, who barreled into my freshly broken knee. I felt my knee move out of place again. The dog chipped a tooth. We went to the vet first. FML
by KilteDKilleR / 10/15/2011 at 10:02am / United States (Utah) / Health
Today, I went shopping with my mom. I went into my department and tried on some clothes. After a few minutes, there is an announcement that a child has gone missing. Staff are searching the store. I see my mom and she hugs me in tears and yells, "I found her!" I'm almost 17. FML
by Ania / 10/15/2011 at 1:13am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by anonymous / 10/12/2011 at 2:11am / Canada / Love
by Anonymous / 10/08/2011 at 12:00pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, my mom baked cupcakes for my visiting grandparents. Later, I saw my grandpa chowing down on them. Even later, my mom demanded to know why there were a dozen cupcake wrappers on my bed. I've essentially been framed by my own grandpa, and am now grounded for a month. FML
by why?! / 09/09/2011 at 9:57pm / United States (Ohio) / Kids
Today, desperate after a very painful breakup, I poured my heart and soul out to my old teddy bear. When I finished, I asked what he would do in my situation. Right on cue, a gust of wind came through the window and sent him falling off the windowsill and crashing head-first onto the floor. FML
by RobinBunny713 / 07/18/2011 at 11:23pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy
by Spooked / 03/06/2011 at 2:38pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids
by Anonymous / 02/04/2011 at 12:42am / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy
by unlucky dudebag / 01/29/2011 at 2:29am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, I asked a customer to send me via e-mail the image he wanted me to print. He said, "I don't…
- Today, I'm looking after three little girls, aged 3, 5 and 7 years old. We're watching Bambi, and… Today, I’m a babysitter for a 4 year-old little girl. All afternoon, I attended Barbie’s murder and… Today, I sprayed pepper spray on a guy who appeared to be following me. He was really cute, and was…