CaliforniaErin

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CaliforniaErin

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 25 September 1988 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4717
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About CaliforniaErin : Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

CaliforniaErin's page activity

Visits<b>kiki1705</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 2:01am<b>FleibenHolden</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 7:12pm<b>jordanrecatto</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 4:03pm<b>raven83</b> - the 12/28/2014 at 10:48am<b>phatdaddy62</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 5:49pm<b>Harshdfml</b> - the 04/16/2013 at 11:41am<b>chanmick</b> - the 04/07/2013 at 12:14pm<b>coolsunshinebear</b> - the 04/03/2013 at 10:17pm<b>GabrielleFrance</b> - the 03/31/2013 at 11:35am<b>martinez121797</b> - the 03/31/2013 at 2:02am<b>neeni88</b> - the 03/15/2013 at 5:28am<b>ICastillo</b> - the 02/19/2013 at 1:24am<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 02/09/2013 at 4:30pm<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 02/07/2013 at 11:19am<b>flupsht</b> - the 02/04/2013 at 3:53am<b>SmoothSeth</b> - the 01/25/2013 at 10:52pm<b>iodineferver</b> - the 01/19/2013 at 3:16pm<b>Seany_93</b> - the 01/15/2013 at 3:41am

CaliforniaErin's FML badges

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

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CaliforniaErin's favorite FMLs

Today, I was stuck in the bathroom yelling for someone to get me toilet paper. My grandpa slips a small leaf under the door and says, "This is what I used in my day." FML

by Obi1Shinobi / 10/30/2012 at 10:27am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, a man with a clipboard came up to me in the street to ask me if I was happy with my life insurance. I couldn't bring myself to admit to him that I'm so clueless about my own life that I wasn't sure I was even happy with the Twix I was eating at the time. FML

by Anonymous / 09/30/2012 at 8:49pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at work, when an elderly lady casually mentioned it was her birthday. I motioned two of my coworkers over, and we sang a little happy birthday to her over the phone. Our boss stormed in mid-song and suspended all three of us on the spot for "unprofessional behavior." FML

by karmas a kunt / 09/21/2012 at 8:28pm / United States / Work

Today, while doing my job as a cart clerk, a gentleman went around the parking lot and picked some trash up, trying to help out. Faith in humanity: +1. About an hour later I saw a woman pick a bug off of her windshield and eat it. Faith in humanity: -200. FML

by TJ / 08/08/2012 at 7:23am / United States (Washington) / Work

Today, I was bagging my groceries when I accidentally smacked myself in the face with a box of popsicles, giving myself a nose bleed. I found out that the cashier hates the sight of blood when she passed out behind the register. They called security on me. FML

Today, I was at a Chinese buffet, and I got a fortune cookie. I opened it, and it said, "The love of your life is sitting across from you". The only thing across from me was an empty chair. FML

by Anonymous / 08/07/2012 at 4:13pm / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, I discovered that I sometimes talk in my sleep. After spending an amazing, perfectly romantic night with my boyfriend, I woke up to him telling me to leave. I have no idea what I could have said. He still won't talk to me. FML

by Anonymous / 08/07/2012 at 10:49am / United States / Love

Today, I had to scream for my dad to come help me, after I got my hair caught in a fan while trying to make the Darth Vader voice. FML

by :$ / 08/06/2012 at 6:08pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to have some fun by joining a Harry Potter forum and making a thread saying it's all for little kids. When I checked back later, my post had been edited into me tearfully coming out of the closet, and some guy had said he'd passed my details on to Anonymous. FML

by icybrent94 / 08/05/2012 at 4:21pm / United Kingdom (Bedfordshire) / Geek

Today, my dad was making coffee for the family. Half-way through, he excused himself to the bathroom, so for a laugh, I discreetly poured a load of salt into his drink. When he served us, I drank a mouthful and doubled over hacking. My dad barked, "I wasn't born yesterday, son." FML

by Anonymous / 07/14/2012 at 4:10pm / Nigeria (Lagos) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend, who is a fully-grown man, that making dinosaur noises in public is no longer acceptable. FML

by shorty4 / 07/13/2012 at 10:36am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, my fiancé's grandmother kept trying to introduce him to this "simply absolutely amazing girl," who she thought "would be just the perfect date" for him. At our engagement party. FML

by Anonymous / 07/13/2012 at 2:47am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I nailed every single move in my routine at a gymnastics competition. I then finished off with a perfect split, letting out a fart loud enough to wake up a kid in China. FML

by LetItRip / 07/12/2012 at 4:35pm / Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha) / Miscellaneous

Today, while taking the trash out, the old cranky elevator in my apartment complex finally gave up on life. For a long hour I was stuck between floors 4 and 5, practically embracing my bio-waste can. FML

by Kazenoe / 07/05/2012 at 7:52am / Finland (Western Finland) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my wife, who is four months pregnant, burst into tears while thinking about the armchair in our living room that we never use. According to her, we're stopping it from living out its destiny as an armchair. FML

by FauteuilEver Alone / 07/05/2012 at 4:11am / France / Miscellaneous