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Caliborn_06

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Caliborn_06
  • Town/Country : Vacaville, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 20 August 1988 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 627
  • Number of comments : 44
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About Caliborn_06 : I'm awesome!

Caliborn_06's last visitors

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Caliborn_06's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of Caliborn_06's badges

Caliborn_06's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML

#20637691
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52810) - you deserved it (7553)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, as her parents were supposed to be out of town, I stayed over with my girlfriend, and we ended up in bed together. Later on, while poking through the fridge, I heard footsteps, so I said, "Didn't think you'd be walking after that." I closed the fridge and saw her dad. FML

#20418714
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34150) - you deserved it (16275)

On 12/24/2012 at 1:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, my boyfriend ended sex by yelling, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and using his foot to push me off the bed. FML

#20417691
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44574) - you deserved it (7274)

On 12/23/2012 at 11:55pm - intimacy - by Saradee (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was going to give my baby daughter an empty Pringles tin to play with on the floor. I saw some crumbs at the bottom, so I emptied the can in my mouth before I gave it to her. I crunched hard and spat them out, realizing my boyfriend had just cut his toenails into the can. FML

#20184636
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24435) - you deserved it (6472)

On 11/29/2012 at 10:00pm - misc - by lizzard0416 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, drunk at a party, I leaned through a window to throw up. I was outside. FML

#20182175
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5577) - you deserved it (17393) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 11/28/2012 at 1:20am - health - by kise - Sent from mobile version

Today, on my job as a police officer, I received a typical domestic disturbance call. Not so typical was the address. Guess my wife's affair went terribly wrong while I was on shift. FML

#20155904
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31433) - you deserved it (1153)

On 11/09/2012 at 2:18am - love - by SebastianMiko (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, just like every morning this month, I woke up, put on my clothes, looked out my window, and was pointed at by a man in a ninja outfit on my neighbor's roof. The police still can't find him. FML

#20155776
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20426) - you deserved it (1706)

On 11/08/2012 at 11:54pm - misc - by Targeted - United States (Washington)

Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML

#20128322
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22233) - you deserved it (3160)

On 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm - kids - by thebeachisthatway (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I asked a girl out. She replied, "Sorry, I'm suddenly a lesbian." FML

#20101904
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21710) - you deserved it (2077)

On 10/04/2012 at 8:28pm - love - by imafunguy (man) - United States

Today, at around 11pm the police made a visit to my house, explaining how my neighbors had thought I was using a universal remote to change their television channels. FML

#20099119
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17073) - you deserved it (938)

On 10/02/2012 at 9:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I unintentionally moaned during my prostate exam. FML

#20092313
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24479) - you deserved it (4519)

On 09/28/2012 at 2:06pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands (Gelderland)

Today, I walked in on my mother rubbing one out. For the third time. I then had to explain to her, also for the third time, why pleasuring herself in the living room is inappropriate. FML

#20071176
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27516) - you deserved it (1470)

On 09/14/2012 at 1:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I had a chat with my husband, and I convinced him to try being more spontaneous to spice up our sex life. This evening, he burst into our bedroom with an eyepatch on, and "seductively" growled, "I'm gonna slay your pussy, wench." FML

#20015589
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10536) - you deserved it (32397)

On 08/11/2012 at 6:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, after my boyfriend and I had gotten frisky last night, I found a note on the front door of my building that read, "Dear girl in apartment 3D, from now on please close the blinds all the way or lose 30 pounds. Either would be acceptable." FML

#20012782
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22082) - you deserved it (11902)

On 08/10/2012 at 1:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Europe



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