Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

CVTTRVN

Online | Search for a member

CVTTRVN

9Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 670
  • Number of comments : 36
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About CVTTRVN : My father forgot me in a parking lot once.

CVTTRVN's page activity

Visits<b>808andheartbreak</b> - one hour ago<b>dkosen777</b> - 7 hours ago<b>ckibb97</b> - 18 hours ago<b>hard_candy</b> - 22 hours ago<b>patrickeli</b> - yesterday at 1:43am<b>krispy_kreme792</b> - yesterday at 4:33am<b>wowwzaa</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 12:20am<b>Unrecognisable</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 10:22am<b>AmyLouR</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 3:45pm<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 1:52pm<b>ThePols</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 10:46am<b>ComoEsJuan</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 9:01am<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 8:15am<b>dustin007</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 1:56am<b>badluckbayan</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 7:37am<b>angiotensin</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 11:37pm<b>sammy1021</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 8:13pm<b>hardesty</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 7:02pm

Liked!<b>dkosen777</b> - 42 minutes ago<b>badluckbayan</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 1:37pm<b>quickit</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 5:24pm<b>jhmler</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 5:32am<b>RocketmanWelbz</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 9:57pm<b>butlins11</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 1:06pm<b>iloovechicken</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 10:54am<b>guru_nanak51</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 1:22am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 2:20am

CVTTRVN's FML badges

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of CVTTRVN's badges

CVTTRVN's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband was getting undressed. I told my 2-year-old daughter not to go in our bedroom because he was undressing in there. I turned my back and she instantly ran off to my bedroom. I heard her shout "I can see daddy's tail!" Now, she points to everyone's crotch and shouts "TAIL!" FML

#20943580
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50294) - you deserved it (6453)

On 11/03/2013 at 9:22am - kids - by KittyKat (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, my boyfriend insisted that I start calling him "Professor Fucktard" in the bedroom. He seems to be dead serious about it. FML

#20777932
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41778) - you deserved it (5326)

On 07/12/2013 at 4:15pm - misc - by O_O (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, Target asked me if I would do the closing announcement. I've only been working there a little while, so excited I agreed. I told people, "The store is now closing, thank you for shopping at Walmart." FML

#19088946
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15810) - you deserved it (29175)

On 02/15/2012 at 9:03pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up to a mosquito feeding on my morning wood; probably the only thing that will ever suck my penis. FML

#16277810
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60585) - you deserved it (10416)

On 05/21/2011 at 5:07am - intimacy - by no one - United States (Alaska)

Today, I woke up, patted my dog and kissed his nose. He was dead. FML

#14693760
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69131) - you deserved it (3867)

On 01/24/2011 at 12:40am - animals - by Anonymous - Egypt



FML's blog

  • Malec's illustrated FML
  • Life is like a box of chocolate full of piece of rabbit droppings sometimes, isn't it? OK, I'll admit that's a weird way to start an article a few days before Christmas. Let me explain: you try and get…

Friday 12 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: