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CTMPandemonium

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CTMPandemonium

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5424
  • Number of comments : 56
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About CTMPandemonium : I'm not saying I'm Batman.... I'm just saying nobody has ever seen Batman and me in the same room...

CTMPandemonium's page activity

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CTMPandemonium's favorite FMLs

Today, I was on a movie date with my boyfriend, when he asked for a handjob. I thought I was doing well until he sighed, took my hand off, and said he could finish on his own. FML

#20761555
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53918) - you deserved it (17385)

On 07/03/2013 at 12:25pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, my boyfriend told me to completely shave off all of my already-groomed pubic area because, "It looks so unnatural." Ignoring the obvious lack of logic, I asked him why he keeps his totally ungroomed. Turns out "Men having hair is okay. Women aren't supposed to, though." FML

#20759121
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51799) - you deserved it (12471)

On 07/02/2013 at 12:37am - intimacy - by yeshehaspornaddiction (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I saw my girlfriend for the first time in weeks. She had a hickey. FML

#20758014
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55388) - you deserved it (5970)

On 07/01/2013 at 2:03pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I found my cat dead on the road. I called my family and told them, and later buried the cat. Not long after I got done burying it, my cat walked up to me. I buried someone else's cat. FML

#20757856
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48010) - you deserved it (9990)

On 07/01/2013 at 12:10pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Utah)

Today, my fiancé paid a visit to my parents so he could ask my dad's permission to marry me. My dad responded with, "Why buy the cow when you can milk it for free?" FML

#20757403
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51304) - you deserved it (4318)

On 07/01/2013 at 2:38am - love - by Gracie-Ann (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, as a joke, my friends pushed me into the men's restroom and held the door shut. As I was trying to push the door open, I heard a voice behind me say, "Wow. Immaturity, huh?" I turned to find a guy taking a dump in one of the urinals. FML

#20757332
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54033) - you deserved it (3468)

On 07/01/2013 at 1:50am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband and I were at the mall, and decided to have a snack at the food court. As we ate, an obese woman squeezed past our table, butt facing us. Just when her ass-cheeks slid past our heads, she let out a horrific fart that my father would be proud of. FML

#20755283
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50371) - you deserved it (3275)

On 06/30/2013 at 12:21am - misc - by whipplewhip - United States

Today, after spending four hours cooking food for a special family dinner, I went to take a shower before they arrived. I came back out less than twenty minutes later to find most of the food gone, and a very guilty-looking puppy. FML

Today, my sister called me up extremely excited because she found out Flo Rida is from Florida. She's 22. FML

#20751029
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38002) - you deserved it (3554)

On 06/27/2013 at 7:37pm - misc - by smh - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was diagnosed with strep throat. My mom wasted no time accusing me of whoring around and claiming that most people get strep from performing oral sex. FML

#20750267
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43537) - you deserved it (3103)

On 06/27/2013 at 12:58pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Finland (Western Finland)

Today, my fiancée decided to go on a "vacation." Our wedding is tomorrow. FML

#20750126
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54133) - you deserved it (3781)

On 06/27/2013 at 11:17am - misc - by Guntherdog - United States

Today, my boss fired me for being "too morally ambiguous". I work at a bagel shop and had told a customer that I was indifferent towards cream cheese. FML

#20749746
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38540) - you deserved it (3630)

On 06/27/2013 at 2:22am - work - by confusedbagel (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a neighbor's kid decided to pick a fight with me because I'm "the new kid in town and need to learn who's in charge". When I told him I'm 27, he said excuses like that aren't going to get me off the hook. I just moved here and I'm already being harassed by a twelve year old. FML

Today, I overheard my mother Skyping with her new "boyfriend" about the $1,000 she just sent him. She barely knew what internet dating was three weeks ago. FML

#20748170
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42921) - you deserved it (3212)

On 06/26/2013 at 10:08am - money - by weneedthatmoneytoliveon (woman) - Australia (Victoria)



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