CTMPandemonium

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Offline (the 06/17/2016 at 5:30am)

CTMPandemonium

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 8937
  • Number of comments : 58
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About CTMPandemonium : I'm not saying I'm Batman.... I'm just saying nobody has ever seen Batman and me in the same room...

CTMPandemonium's page activity

Visits<b>Rababco</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 3:12pm<b>weedle99</b> - the 04/19/2016 at 6:32am<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 12/19/2015 at 8:02pm<b>i_wuz_nver_here</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 12:37pm<b>tisvana18</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 11:04am<b>Raleaf</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 9:21am<b>logan12382</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 8:07am<b>inthehidden</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 5:12pm<b>RavingHaven</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 2:46pm<b>One_Way</b> - the 09/06/2015 at 1:30am<b>alkanbigdick</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 7:38pm<b>vampivy23</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 1:08am<b>max367</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 3:15am<b>ToxicTyrael</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 9:47am<b>Princess_Eevee9</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 10:00am<b>Jason89</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 3:00pm<b>MikeonFML</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 9:26am<b>xKrisSmoove</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 2:53am

Fucked!<b>RavingHaven</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 8:46pm

CTMPandemonium's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of CTMPandemonium's badges

CTMPandemonium's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife appropriated our savings to finance her crazy, midlife crisis idea of designing and marketing Cheez Whiz dildos. FML

by Anonymous / 08/30/2013 at 5:05pm / United States (New York) / Money

Today, my boyfriend told me that he would leave me if I didn't seek help for my eating disorder. The eating disorder in question? Vegetarianism. FML

by itsellie27 / 08/30/2013 at 10:44am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Health

Today, I woke up to a very unpleasant feeling. Apparently, the tattoo I got on my arm a couple of days ago attracted hundreds of ants during its healing process. They were literally carrying away pieces of my skin. I can not get the feeling or image out of my head. FML

by aly55a_mariie / 08/20/2013 at 3:04pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old standing over me with a pillow. I asked him what he was doing, and he replied that he and Steve were playing a game, but Steve said I have to be asleep for it. Steve is my son's imaginary friend. I'm convinced Steve wants to kill me. FML

by DrtySnchez / 08/18/2013 at 5:37am / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, I went downstairs a little after midnight to grab a snack, and in the dark hallway, I clearly saw a small child walk into the kitchen. I was freaked out, but I followed him in. There was nobody in the room. I'm now too scared to sleep, and am seriously considering moving house. FML

by fsfs / 08/17/2013 at 12:27pm / Germany (Schleswig-Holstein) / Miscellaneous

Today, at the yacht club I work at a girl ordered a Portabella wrap. She asked for no cheese or veggies, just the Portabellas. After she got the sandwich and ate half of it, she sent it back saying she didn't know it had mushrooms in it. FML

by anonymous / 08/16/2013 at 10:05am / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, a child was choking in the store I work at. He was alone in the aisle, so I started the Heimlich without his parents' permission. After dislodging what was caught, his mother turned the corner and went screaming to my manager for touching her kid. I got a write up. FML

by justwantingtohelp / 08/16/2013 at 1:02am / United States (Michigan) / Kids

Today, I went to a store. I was wearing a shirt that I'd bought from the very same store, and was accused of stealing. When I tried explaining, the manager said I was lying because I'm a teenager and "all teenagers are full of shit." FML

Today, my dog died. In the same kitchen corner that two of my other dogs have died. I have a "Corner Of Death" in my kitchen. FML

by The Corner Of Death / 08/12/2013 at 4:17am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, I asked my girlfriend if she had ever broken up with anyone. She said, "Yes. You." and walked off. FML

by WTF? / 08/12/2013 at 12:49am / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, my girlfriend texted me "I think we should move in". Then, ten seconds later she sent another text that said, "Sorry, typo. Move on". FML

by DandoisFLAT / 08/11/2013 at 10:42pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I took my driving test. As I was about to turn at a green light, a car sped toward us from the other direction, running a red light. My instructor failed me because I stopped to avoid getting rammed. Apparently I should have kept going, because it was my right of way. FML

by Anonymous / 08/10/2013 at 3:28pm / United States (North Carolina) / Transportation

Today, I got a call from my son's kindergarten teacher. Apparently my son asked a girl to marry him. After she said no, he stabbed her with a fork. FML

by Anonymous / 08/10/2013 at 12:02am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I was video chatting with my boyfriend and his friends. When I stood up, he told his friend "See, she's not a twig!" I jokingly replied with, "So I'm fat?" After a few seconds of silence, his friend yelled, "It's a trap!" and left the chat. FML

by ImNotFat / 08/07/2013 at 2:04am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, my girlfriend of 3 weeks gave me an ultimatum: marry her, or she kills herself. FML

by Anonymous / 08/01/2013 at 3:36am / United States (Arizona) / Love