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CTMPandemonium

Offline (the 06/26/2015 at 12:56pm) | Search for a member

CTMPandemonium

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6892
  • Number of comments : 56
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About CTMPandemonium : I'm not saying I'm Batman.... I'm just saying nobody has ever seen Batman and me in the same room...

CTMPandemonium's page activity

Visits<b>vampivy23</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 1:08am<b>max367</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 3:15am<b>ToxicTyrael</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 9:47am<b>Princess_Eevee9</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 10:00am<b>Jason89</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 3:00pm<b>MikeonFML</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 9:26am<b>xKrisSmoove</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 2:53am<b>DaggNabbit</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 12:54am<b>IWeigh2Tons</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 11:58pm<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 7:35pm<b>tor415</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 6:08pm<b>CrumpledQuill</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 5:31pm<b>coltonte3</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 4:56pm<b>amandalynn84</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 3:43pm<b>Mkm1997</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 11:19pm<b>ClockworkPoleaxe</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 4:28am<b>imsoeffingbored</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 1:43am<b>Civilian</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 8:06am

CTMPandemonium's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of CTMPandemonium's badges

CTMPandemonium's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to explain to my brother why it's not OK to stick his knob in the toaster. FML

#20893446
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40478) - you deserved it (3101)

On 09/23/2013 at 8:05pm - kids - by latter - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend got out of the shower and tried to hit my forehead with his penis. He slipped and slapped me in the eye with it. FML

#20891019
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50469) - you deserved it (9290)

On 09/22/2013 at 1:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I called work crying, telling them that I wouldn't be able to go to work tomorrow due to my grandmother's sudden and tragic death. After hanging up, I walked into the midnight release of Grand Theft Auto 5. I had no idea my boss was also an avid gamer. FML

#20884742
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18109) - you deserved it (89451)

On 09/17/2013 at 12:36am - work - by fired (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was playing World of Warcraft, when all of a sudden, I remembered I was supposed to be at a wedding. I was 25 minutes late to my own wedding. FML

#20880446
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22333) - you deserved it (89942)

On 09/14/2013 at 1:23am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I had sex with a guy wearing a KFC uniform. Hat included. FML

#20877518
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22686) - you deserved it (68153)

On 09/11/2013 at 8:16pm - intimacy - by lyfisdyno - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, I was watching a movie on TV. One of the characters has the same name as my dog, and when his name was called, my dog got so excited that he jumped face-first into my TV. FML

#20876988
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49725) - you deserved it (3967)

On 09/11/2013 at 12:57pm - animals - by ugh Buck! (woman) - United States

Today, I was asked to leave a church service for laughing at the kids trying to sing. FML

#20876850
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22349) - you deserved it (75020)

On 09/11/2013 at 9:29am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, I hooked up with the guy I've liked for a while, even though my friends joked that his large pickup truck meant that he was "compensating" for having a small penis. They were right. Very right. FML

#20876171
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55581) - you deserved it (12218)

On 09/10/2013 at 8:14pm - intimacy - by CityBoysNow - United States (Missouri)

Today, even after loving him unconditionally, my originally 340 pound morbidly obese husband, who within the past two years lost almost 200 pounds, left me because now, he "can do so much better". FML

#20874079
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72687) - you deserved it (4113)

On 09/09/2013 at 3:19am - love - by heartbroken - United States (California)

Today, I took my girlfriend to a public place before confessing that I've been seeing another woman, to avoid a dramatic scene. After being rushed to the hospital with a concussion and broken nose, I think it's safe to say my plan didn't go very well. FML

#20873101
356 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19726) - you deserved it (99669)

On 09/08/2013 at 3:31pm - love - by verbaltodomestic (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, for the third time since breakfast, I accidentally walked in on my father wanking. FML

#20870154
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53349) - you deserved it (6645)

On 09/06/2013 at 12:48pm - intimacy - by jesus christ, dad (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, my new creative writing teacher informed the class that we should consult him before writing anything "dark or disturbing." I only took the class because my therapist recommended that I join the class so I could freely express my darker thoughts without her help or a fear of being judged. FML

#20866346
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35362) - you deserved it (2632)

On 09/03/2013 at 5:43pm - misc - by depressed (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my husband thought it would be acceptable to watch Breaking Bad on Netflix with my 4-year-old in the room. What happened to be the only line he picked up? "Well heil Hitler, bitch!" I found out from his preschool teacher. FML

#20865525
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43788) - you deserved it (4832)

On 09/03/2013 at 12:13am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I witnessed my husband hocking a loogie into his hand, then throwing it into the trash can and continuing to make our sandwiches. FML

#20863339
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37457) - you deserved it (2930)

On 09/01/2013 at 4:04pm - misc - by no no no no no no no no no no no fuck no (woman) - Greece (Attiki)

Today, while I was sleeping, apparently I rolled over towards my fiancé and told him "We gotta save the turtles!" and had a five seconds long fart. Now he won't stop making fun of me. FML

#20861263
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43298) - you deserved it (7359)

On 08/31/2013 at 2:04am - misc - by fartz (woman) - United States



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