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CTMPandemonium

Offline (the 09/11/2014 at 12:54pm) | Search for a member

CTMPandemonium

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1743
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About CTMPandemonium : I'm not saying I'm Batman.... I'm just saying nobody has ever seen Batman and me in the same room...

CTMPandemonium's page activity

Visits<b>headphones23</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 4:11pm<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 11:13pm<b>noideaforname</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 7:59am<b>Klairem11</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 2:55pm<b>RollingCakes</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 5:42pm<b>Cupcake040</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 5:05pm<b>JVVortex</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 3:11pm<b>domking1315</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 2:33pm<b>mjlocat</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 1:10pm<b>123bmxme</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 11:45am<b>Aquaman911</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 11:19am<b>BigJoeZD</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 11:10am<b>Xivion</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 10:22am<b>Catkam623</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 9:55am<b>MaiMai137</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 9:45am<b>gracehi</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 9:40am<b>RoseFox0029</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 9:02am<b>Roskie</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 7:41am

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CTMPandemonium's favorite FMLs

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She just grabbed the ring and said in a raspy voice, "My precious..." FML

#21250558
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40310) - you deserved it (7695)

On 09/02/2014 at 2:58pm - love - by anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I wrecked my car because my mom texted me, telling me not to text and drive. FML

#21249597
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22557) - you deserved it (39426)

On 09/01/2014 at 10:08am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my sister felt guilty and told me about the changes she secretly made to my résumé months ago. She'd put "doing your mom" and "corporate espionage" as my hobbies, and "Justin Bieber's pussy waxer" as a previous job. No wonder I'm still unemployed. FML

#21244565
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39824) - you deserved it (7245)

On 08/24/2014 at 5:50pm - work - by fuck you, tasha (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44191) - you deserved it (7525)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got drunk, broke up with my girlfriend, and sent my grandma nude pics, thinking she was my girlfriend. Well, ex-girlfriend. FML

#21241704
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20240) - you deserved it (38612)

On 08/20/2014 at 1:53pm - misc - by Kev (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I heard my sister gagging in her room. She was doing it quietly, and I got pretty concerned, after hearing a lot about bulimia recently. I knocked, then heard a gasp, so I let myself in, only to see her on her knees and her boyfriend with his underwear around his ankles. FML

#21233355
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49036) - you deserved it (19364)

On 08/09/2014 at 3:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, while I was working customer support, a lady hung up on me mid-sentence, and I trailed off, saying "…aaannnddd you hung up on me like a bitch." Turned out she was still on the line and had just accidentally hit mute. FML

#21232769
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23434) - you deserved it (35989)

On 08/08/2014 at 8:16pm - work - by suspended (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take me out on a date. He doesn't have a car, but he said he'd borrow transport from his neighbor. He showed up at my house on a ride-on lawn mower. FML

#21213104
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46743) - you deserved it (6623)

On 07/18/2014 at 4:21pm - love - by Lisa (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I ran into a good friend at work. I work at a jail. She doesn't. FML

#21211411
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51284) - you deserved it (4202)

On 07/16/2014 at 11:51pm - misc - by Is that..? - United States (Colorado)

Today, I parked my motorcycle in a parking spot. When I came back, my bike had been moved and was laying on its side with a note saying, "Sorry I dropped your motorcycle I was trying to move it forward so I could park my car because there weren't any other spots." FML

#21197788
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48815) - you deserved it (6196)

On 07/03/2014 at 9:30pm - misc - by AJL - United States

Today, I was talking to my boss about dogs and cats. I'm a dog person; he's a cat person. He told me that he likes cats better, because they are laid back and don't do anything all day. Before I could stop myself, I blurted out, "Just like you?" FML

#21188385
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36871) - you deserved it (25116)

On 06/25/2014 at 8:20pm - work - by Respect101 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out I have genital herpes. I'm a virgin. FML

#21181955
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52925) - you deserved it (5166)

On 06/20/2014 at 2:20pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I clogged the only toilet at work. Thinking I could escape and blame someone else, I opened the door, only to see a line of people waiting outside. FML

#21168163
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43500) - you deserved it (15650)

On 06/09/2014 at 12:28pm - work - by deservedly - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend shrieking at the top of his lungs. I ran into the dining room where he was, to find him standing on the table screaming "Kill it!" while pointing at an unmoving spider the size of a Tic Tac on the wall. FML

#21167015
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43671) - you deserved it (6257)

On 06/08/2014 at 11:10am - love - by eightleggedtictac - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I accidentally said the wrong name during sex. That name just happened to be "Sarah", which is both my ex-girlfriend's name and my wife's sister's name. When she asked me which one I meant, I panicked and said, "Both." FML

#21140956
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32547) - you deserved it (52149)

On 05/15/2014 at 6:57pm - intimacy - by FLIPmcCOOL - Ireland (Cork)



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  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

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