Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

CRrawsum

Search for a member

CRrawsum

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 21 March 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4482
  • Number of comments : 94
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About CRrawsum : Screenwriter/ makeup artist in training.

CRrawsum's page activity

Visits<b>KittyRapist6661</b> - yesterday at 4:50pm<b>ItsAlly</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 1:56am<b>frankiero</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 8:22am<b>PrimeRibYum</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 9:28pm<b>gillyman</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 11:52pm<b>TrialErrorTrial</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 1:57pm<b>miztigers53</b> - the 02/21/2014 at 8:00am<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 02/15/2014 at 5:22pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 5:02am<b>HappynessSA</b> - the 11/11/2013 at 8:33am<b>sammyjo06</b> - the 11/08/2013 at 7:24pm<b>luckylucas26</b> - the 11/02/2013 at 3:19am<b>EllaJSwiftie</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 4:34am<b>DidntKnowShesAHo</b> - the 10/02/2013 at 3:50am<b>minimammoth</b> - the 09/13/2013 at 3:40am<b>akma9</b> - the 08/16/2013 at 6:17pm<b>luminis12</b> - the 08/13/2013 at 6:37am<b>Trish01</b> - the 08/09/2013 at 6:50am

CRrawsum's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of CRrawsum's badges

CRrawsum's favorite FMLs

Today, In my science class I sit next to my friend Jill. My teacher always gets our names confused calling me Jill and her Liz. She decided to combine our names. I'm now known as Jizz. My teacher clearly has no idea what it means. FML

#2831839
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (140203) - you deserved it (10019)

On 06/12/2009 at 2:50pm - misc - by mcullen21 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my car was in the shop so I borrowed my wife's VW Beetle convertible. It's really embarrassing because it's a girlie car and it's full of little stuffed animals. At a stop light a man asked me if I'd like to borrow one of his testicles because "every man should have at least one." FML

#2812014
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (94794) - you deserved it (20004)

On 06/11/2009 at 8:23pm - misc - by NoBalls (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I woke up from a dream about finding a vending machine that gave me free food. I kept eating, it was so satisfying words could not describe how great it felt. Then I realized my hands were in between my legs, I had been touching myself dreaming about free food from a vending machine. FML

#2801625
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66597) - you deserved it (14807)

On 06/11/2009 at 1:51pm - intimacy - by hdat (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had my first appearance in a court as an attorney. I called the prosecution the prostitution. FML

#2796637
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78819) - you deserved it (22096)

On 06/11/2009 at 7:52am - work - by apav (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

#2532710
1165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84064) - you deserved it (223189)

On 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm - animals - by fmlfmlfml (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was lighting fireworks for my cousin's birthday in my Grandmother's yard. When it came time to light the "Grand Finale", I read on the outside of the box,"Face this side toward crowd for best result". After I lit it, I realized that it was on it's side. I shot 100 fireworks at my family. FML

#2252019
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11310) - you deserved it (53274)

On 05/24/2009 at 7:52pm - misc - by Tyler_Padgett (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went to the store to buy groceries. I didn't care how I looked, so I wore an old shirt that said, "Thousands of my potential children died on your daughter's face last night." I ran into my girlfriend's parents at the store. FML

#2244608
455 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40636) - you deserved it (141100)

On 05/24/2009 at 3:50pm - misc - by helloitsbrian6969 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years and I decided to have sex for the first time. When we were in the room, finally ready to start, she confessed that she had never seen a penis before. To make her more comfortable, I showed her mine. At the sight of it, well, she actually fainted. FML

#2182938
381 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83458) - you deserved it (10227)

On 05/22/2009 at 3:50pm - intimacy - by herve (man) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, I missed my flight because I was stopped by airport security. They found "small, suspicious, spherical objects" in my purse on the X-ray. After pulling me out of line, taking my purse aside and carefully opening it with tongs, they removed the bag of grapes I had packed as a snack. FML

#1808488
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49255) - you deserved it (10245)

On 05/10/2009 at 10:18am - misc - by Ya - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was serving a family at the restaurant where I work. When I went to ask the little girl what she wanted, I was tongue-tied and got "cutie" and "hun" mixed up and ended up asking, "What can I get for you, cuntie?" FML

#1751488
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76887) - you deserved it (23425)

On 05/08/2009 at 4:53pm - work - by keeks_25 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, was my first meeting with business partners as I am new to the team. Instead of saying that I was looking forward to "stretching my legs" or "spreading my wings", I told them I was anxious to start "spreading my legs". FML

#1683242
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57397) - you deserved it (19972)

On 05/06/2009 at 2:04am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was about to lose my virginity with my girlfriend of 2 years, when I got an urgent phone call from my 9-year-old sister, telling me I had to come home immediately. My grandma fell off the toilet and got stuck between the bowl and the wall. I'm not making this up. FML

#1604682
314 comments

I agree, your life sucks (272156) - you deserved it (17613)

On 05/03/2009 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was holding a lit cigarette in one hand and a lollipop in the other. Guess which one I licked? FML

#1600117
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21002) - you deserved it (127977)

On 05/03/2009 at 5:05pm - misc - by htothecr (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I had my first job interview and didn't have much of an appetite because of the nerves. So I grabbed a brownie that my roommate had left in the fridge and ate it on the train ride in to the city. About 20 minutes into my interview I was so stoned I couldn't speak. FML

#1550190
359 comments

I agree, your life sucks (182032) - you deserved it (46879)

On 05/02/2009 at 2:28am - work - by Dunzo15 (man) - United States (New York)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: