Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

CRaynee

Search for a member

CRaynee
  • Town/Country : Ellsworth, U.S.A
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 11 June 1996 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 958
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About CRaynee : Im out going and fun[: up for anythingg; ask questions?

Formspring.me/Cheyenneraynee

CRaynee's last visitors

hockeymatt296j3acobSunshineX7dextrementorIceMan11norwegianboipKyngJulianLukeE45lmc94

CRaynee's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of CRaynee's badges

CRaynee's favorite FMLs

Today, I was out shopping when an old lady bumped into me and dropped her purse. Trying to help, I bent over to pick it up, at which point she battered the shit out of me, called me a "filthy thief" and threatened to open an umbrella in my ass. What the fuck has the world come to? FML

#17578977
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33611) - you deserved it (2402)

On 08/25/2011 at 5:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my aunt and uncle stole $584 from me, since I'm moving out. Their reasoning? I stole things. When I asked what I'd stolen, my aunt looked me straight in the eye and said "Milk Duds." FML

#17566014
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26772) - you deserved it (2481)

On 08/24/2011 at 4:03am - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my house got watermeloned. Not egged, watermeloned. FML

#17564993
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33276) - you deserved it (2973)

On 08/24/2011 at 1:28am - misc - by skichick54 - United States (Washington)

Today, I work by myself at a retail store and I was bored so I called my boyfriend. I woke him up and he was feeling frisky, and as things were getting heated I started to moan and say dirty things. Until the entire rack of clothes fell over and revealed my boss hiding. He had a boner. FML

#17557500
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16987) - you deserved it (47873)

On 08/23/2011 at 12:18pm - intimacy - by MissCan'tKeepAJob - United States (Texas)

Today, while going around trying to find a job, a manager came up to ask me, "Are you looking to work here?" I nodded happily, hoping this would be the end of my search. She looked me up and down, saw I had a jacket on to hide my tattoos and said, "Sorry, I can't hire heroin addicts." FML

#17555220
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23960) - you deserved it (8977)

On 08/23/2011 at 2:50am - work - by Protectress (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, a hooker refused my custom. According to her, "Even whores have standards." FML

#17548776
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18678) - you deserved it (39367)

On 08/22/2011 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, while at my boxing gym, an old man came inside and did the oddest drunk dance in order to serenade me. I'm a fighter and fine with taking punches to the face, but froze in terror at the sight of this. FML

#17545368
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19323) - you deserved it (2764)

On 08/22/2011 at 3:44am - misc - by No Action Fighter - United States (California)

Today, I burned my tongue. With a flat iron. FML

#17544940
297 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7752) - you deserved it (50081)

On 08/22/2011 at 2:43am - health - by heheheh - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend told me he wouldn't have sex with me because yesterday I ate a sandwich in his bed and got crumbs in it. FML

#17543334
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15314) - you deserved it (30244)

On 08/21/2011 at 11:44pm - intimacy - by datingmrpicky (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got a spray tan. The lady asked what shade I wanted to be, and joking, I said the darkest. She took it seriously. Now no one can recognize me, and I have work tomorrow. FML

#17541150
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5897) - you deserved it (55396)

On 08/21/2011 at 8:17pm - misc - by Sally - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I went into a public bathroom and walked in on a guy checking his butt out in the mirror to see if he'd wiped properly. FML

#17541030
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25574) - you deserved it (1769)

On 08/21/2011 at 8:03pm - misc - by Bobby ray slice - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my girlfriend came over to stay the night. Before she arrived, I popped a viagra to spice things up. She then informed me that she was on her period and didn't feel comfortable doing it. I had a headache and a massive boner all night. FML

#17538243
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11293) - you deserved it (39404)

On 08/21/2011 at 1:36pm - intimacy - by RohnAbheek - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I found out apparently, I have a weird looking vagina. How? My boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. He took one look at my vagina and with a look of horror said, "I have never seen one this GROSS." He's a gynecologist and probably sees 20 vaginas a day. FML

#17536285
469 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55190) - you deserved it (6813)

On 08/21/2011 at 5:59am - intimacy - by Username - United States (Ohio)

Today, I learned the hard way that when a pierced, tattooed, and otherwise extremely stereotypical biker chick jokingly threatens to find you and beat you up if you don't call her back after a one-night stand, she's not actually joking. FML

#17531904
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11012) - you deserved it (39475)

On 08/20/2011 at 8:08pm - intimacy - by owmyhead (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, in algebra, I took out my notebook. My Chinese teacher was so impressed with my "Chinese" writings on the cover that I'm now her "favorite student". Those "Chinese" symbols are actually Japanese, but I wanted someone to like me so badly that I didn't correct her. FML

#17530049
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24001) - you deserved it (4814)

On 08/20/2011 at 3:40pm - misc - by Miguel - United States



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: