CRUX

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CRUX

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 13 August 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5797
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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CRUX's page activity

Visits<b>samrompain</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 1:53pm<b>ford99</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 5:29pm<b>Deon_K</b> - the 12/01/2013 at 2:06pm<b>Gentelman999</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 4:58pm<b>adambomb8181</b> - the 07/26/2013 at 12:16am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:27pm<b>username666</b> - the 05/13/2009 at 5:10pm<b>ImSexy</b> - the 05/09/2009 at 5:04pm<b>wdaareg</b> - the 05/02/2009 at 10:25pm<b>MCart</b> - the 03/10/2009 at 6:03pm

CRUX's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

CRUX's favorite FMLs

Today, the police posted a description of the car of a child abductor. As everyone slowed down to read the billboard, I realized that the car's description and license plate were very similar to mine. After getting death stares from passengers, I got pulled over. Twice. FML

by eyeamcool / 04/17/2009 at 12:11am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I was home alone while my mom went out to dinner. I decided to hop in the shower, and I noticed my mom left her douche in there. After, I texted her telling her what I found and that it was gross. Her response? "It's not gross. It came from my vagina, like you and your sister." FML

by duuuuude / 04/16/2009 at 11:08pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Health

Today, I sent a cover letter to a potential employer. In the letter, I talked about my great attention to detail, my strong ability to focus, and my stellar writing skills. After hitting send, I reread the letter and noticed that I typed my name "B-R-A-I-N." My name is Brian. FML

by jusfonzin / 04/16/2009 at 12:09am / United States (New York) / Work

Today, I took the bus to work. A sweet old lady got on after and sat next to me. Halfway there, she fell asleep, her head on my shoulder. I gently tried to wake her up before my stop. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML

by meteorbabe0101 / 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm / United States (Michigan) / Health

Today, I got a haircut for the first time in almost a year. I thought it looked really nice and made me look good. On my way to CVS, I ran into one of my friends. He examined me and said, "You look... like a crack whore." FML

by Anonymous / 04/11/2009 at 9:42pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend got the breast implants she's been wanting for the last 5 years. When I went to pick her up at the hospital she said, "Maybe I can find a guy with a real job now!" I paid for her fake tits. FML

by Anonymous / 04/11/2009 at 11:47am / United States (Massachusetts) / Money

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

by creepermagnet / 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm / United States (Maryland) / Love

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

by creepermagnet / 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm / United States (Maryland) / Love

Today, I was at a sandwich shop and couldn't help but secretly remove a loose hair from a girl standing in front of me. I yanked it and she instantly began screaming and crying. It was in fact a very long mole hair. The thing started bleeding like a gunshot wound. My apologies went unnoticed. FML

by Mason_Jayson / 03/22/2009 at 3:45pm / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was at a sandwich shop and couldn't help but secretly remove a loose hair from a girl standing in front of me. I yanked it and she instantly began screaming and crying. It was in fact a very long mole hair. The thing started bleeding like a gunshot wound. My apologies went unnoticed. FML

by Mason_Jayson / 03/22/2009 at 3:45pm / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went skinny-dipping with my best friend. We were on the beach and it was fairly crowded but we got in the water at this really secluded area. While we were swimming I looked up to see a homeless man wearing my clothes, walking away. FML

by cjj325 / 03/20/2009 at 7:35pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML

by DSM / 03/14/2009 at 7:05am / United States (North Dakota) / Love

Today, I was on the subway. I have fairly serious OCD, so I avoided holding the poles or handles. All the seats were taken, so I leaned against a wall. At the next stop, an obese, sweaty man got on and grabbed the two poles around me, effectively hugging me. My shirt was wet when he left. FML

by Anon / 03/13/2009 at 12:00am / United States (New Jersey) / Transportation

Today, my mother and I went to Wal-Mart to buy pads. I suggested I get tampons instead, so that I can go swimming at my boyfriend's cottage. My mother then goes to the nearest store employee and asks, "excuse me, if my daughter uses a tampon, does that mean she is no longer a virgin?" FML

by tamponmayhem / 03/09/2009 at 3:30pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I was with my family at a buffet getting dessert. As I had my chocolate cake in hand, I grabbed an extra slice of cheesecake for my mom because I knew she would like a slice. Upon returning to my table, a couple walking behind me commented, "See, that's why Americans are so obese." FML

by McChunky =( / 03/09/2009 at 4:25am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous