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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I was on the bus home and on the phone with my best friend discussing my sex life with this new guy I'm seeing. I was telling her all sorts of raunchy sex things we've done until someone taps my shoulder and says "I'm sure he doesn't appreciate you saying this in public." It was his mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22968) - you deserved it (75109)
On 05/19/2009 at 8:51pm - intimacy - by Kens (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I was at the water park with my boyfriend. We were getting on a two-person tube slide. As I went to sit in the front I noticed the lifeguard looking me up and down, what I assumed was him checking me out. I found out I was wrong when he said, "Heaviest in back." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42257) - you deserved it (7005)
On 05/18/2009 at 1:48am - health - by barbie (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, my 6 year old daughter saw a man in a wheelchair who's leg had been amputated. She walks up to him and says, "What happened?". He answers kindly that he's a war veteran. She then responds, "Well then you deserve to get your leg blown off. You shouldn't be killing people." FML
I agree, your life sucks (78599) - you deserved it (15578)
On 05/17/2009 at 9:19pm - kids - by embarrassedmom (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, my boyfriend and I were "fooling around." It started to get hot and he took out his penis for the first time. This was the first one I've seen in real life so I decided I'd complimented it. I had no idea what to say so I said, "It's pretty." FML
I agree, your life sucks (50226) - you deserved it (39079)
On 05/16/2009 at 1:44pm - intimacy - by madzlovesgee (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, while checking through the graphic novel section of my library, I noticed a gay manga porn comic. While I was wondering who in the world would ever RENT such an item, I realised I had been staring at it for a full five minutes and people were watching me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13022) - you deserved it (6949)
On 05/15/2009 at 7:07am - intimacy - by dwek (man) - United Kingdom (Bristol)
Today, I am wearing a panda suit for the promotion of the restaurant I work at. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47401) - you deserved it (11390)
On 05/14/2009 at 8:40am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, a friend and I went to Gamestop to pick up a game he wanted. I ended up buying a 17+ game, and I was prepared to show my license, but he stopped me an said, "I know you're 18". He then said, "Man, I've pretty much watched you grow up in this store." A game salesman watched me grow up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18399) - you deserved it (45347)
On 05/12/2009 at 7:09am - misc - by Rech (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I was taking a bath and needed shampoo. I leaned on the soap holder to get some and it came off the wall. Huge ants started pouring out running up the walls, down the walls, EVERYWHERE. I ran out of the bathroom screaming, completely naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (67015) - you deserved it (4478)
On 05/12/2009 at 12:19am - misc - by Karmas3itch - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was taking a bath and needed shampoo. I leaned on the soap holder to get some and it came off the wall. Huge ants started pouring out running up the walls, down the walls, EVERYWHERE. I ran out of the bathroom screaming, completely naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (67015) - you deserved it (4478)
On 05/12/2009 at 12:19am - misc - by Karmas3itch - United States (Ohio)
Today, I almost drowned in the ocean after being sucked into a rip current. When I finally managed to make it back to shore breathless from all the energy it took to get back, I looked down and my swimming trunks were gone. I was crawling on the ground naked in front of a hundred people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52563) - you deserved it (2879)
On 05/09/2009 at 4:16am - misc - by matt5th35hit (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I was driving home, it was 80 degrees out. Making a rare attempt to be eco-friendly, I turned off the A/C and lowered the windows. A bee then flew in through the window, hit my cheek, and stung me. That's what I get for attempting to be eco-friendly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35747) - you deserved it (7982)
On 05/07/2009 at 10:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I went to donate blood for the first time. When they stuck the needle in my arm, I had a panic attack and begged that they take it out. The woman helping me told me she'd take it out in a moment and left. It was then that the Red Cross stole a pint of my blood while I had a panic attack. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39788) - you deserved it (12421)
On 05/05/2009 at 8:22pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was about to lose my virginity with my girlfriend of 2 years, when I got an urgent phone call from my 9-year-old sister, telling me I had to come home immediately. My grandma fell off the toilet and got stuck between the bowl and the wall. I'm not making this up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (206901) - you deserved it (10101)
On 05/03/2009 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I overheard my dad's friend complaining to my dad that his new baby boy is a ginger. I continued listening, and heard my dad saying, "Yeah, there's nothing worse than having a ginger." I'm his daughter. I'm a ginger. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50590) - you deserved it (5897)
On 05/03/2009 at 12:40pm - misc - by Deirbhile (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, during lunch at school, a wave of nausea came over me. I ran to the bathroom and made it just in time. As I was throwing up, I set off the toilet's automatic flush and my vomit came flying back into my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56387) - you deserved it (3557)
On 05/02/2009 at 1:05pm - health - by sicktomystomach (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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