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Offline (the 06/09/2016 at 9:40pm)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 19 April 2000 (16 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3201
  • Number of comments : 72
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 35 posted

About CODplayer4lyfe : I'm sorry for my name, I can't change it.

(Beware of the wall of text)

I'm 15 and play football as well as wrestle. I love food, video games, and fucking around on my computer Message me if you want, doesn't matter. I will be majoring in video game creation and/or computer science in general. I'm more of a math person, fuck the english. Sentence fragments are my favorite. I love to read sci-fi, if you know any good books let me know. I've been told I have nice eyes. (ಠ ͜ʖಠ)

CODplayer4lyfe's page activity

Visits<b>sfw373</b> - the 11/29/2016 at 5:18pm<b>TheGreastest</b> - the 11/23/2016 at 12:10am<b>dguzman92</b> - the 11/15/2016 at 9:19am<b>Bonngoo</b> - the 11/01/2016 at 4:49pm<b>taco_warrior17</b> - the 08/16/2016 at 11:20pm<b>OrchidKitten</b> - the 08/15/2016 at 10:52pm<b>Infamous_Pickle</b> - the 08/12/2016 at 5:03pm<b>Ginger_Love</b> - the 07/29/2016 at 11:54pm<b>ImKimitheEmo</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 7:02pm<b>thatsaxguy</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 6:26am<b>Raelthelamb</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 8:39pm<b>Daniel_A_Bass</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 11:24am<b>Babygirl117</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 11:17am<b>Rozay333</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 7:21am<b>LoneWolf2879</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 9:32am<b>dogsroscoerocky</b> - the 03/16/2016 at 3:26pm<b>dessy789</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 3:50pm<b>aliceaudrey1997</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 1:37am

Fucked!<b>TheGreastest</b> - the 11/23/2016 at 6:11am<b>Infamous_Pickle</b> - the 08/12/2016 at 11:03pm<b>ImKimitheEmo</b> - the 07/17/2016 at 1:02am<b>Babygirl117</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 5:17pm<b>Rozay333</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 1:21pm<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 3:58pm<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 8:25am<b>ididntdoitiswear</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 1:52am<b>FitFriday</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 8:22pm<b>Michelle1121</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 12:56pm<b>tfigs100</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 7:51pm<b>maggiefox</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 7:03am<b>ChloeRattlehead</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 6:18am<b>clairesucks</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 12:17pm<b>thevelociraptor</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 8:04am<b>thehellisthis</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 5:11am<b>kenzie14840</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 7:29pm<b>brook823</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 7:05am

CODplayer4lyfe's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!


You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of CODplayer4lyfe's badges

CODplayer4lyfe's favorite FMLs

Today, my partner and I got called out to a domestic disturbance. Things turned ugly while we were en-route. Long story short, I now know how many grown men it takes to lift a nearly 400lb shit-covered woman onto a stretcher. I almost reconsidered my choice of career. FML

by Anonymous / 12/04/2015 at 10:43pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I found out my fiancé is already married when his wife showed up at my door. That's about the same time she found her husband is gay, and that Ashley can be a man's name. FML

by Anonymous / 11/20/2015 at 9:43am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I dropped my toothbrush. Because I have the spatial awareness of a mentally-retarded gnat, I hit my head against the sink as I bent down to get it. Then I did the same on the way back up, almost KO'ing myself. My boyfriend saw the whole thing and nearly pissed himself laughing. FML

by dammit / 09/12/2015 at 4:11am / Australia (Queensland) / Health

Today, my brother said he was cleaning his room. When I walked in, he was giving my cousin a blowjob. FML

by Anonymous / 08/29/2015 at 7:01pm / United States (West Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, my mom kicked my dad out of the house and told him not to come home again. Why? I started watching some porn on my computer, forgetting I was still connected to the bluetooth speakers in the living room. My mom thought it was my dad, and I didn't have the balls to admit the truth. FML

by Anonymous / 06/26/2015 at 2:08pm / Russian Federation (Moscow City) / Miscellaneous

Today, I brought my best friend home and told my dad we were going to study together. He loudly replied "Woah!", stumbled around for a few seconds like he was drunk, then apologized and said the "sheer amount of gayness" between us had overloaded his gaydar. We're not gay, dammit! FML

by notgay / 06/21/2015 at 2:04am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, my parents bought my 11-year-old brother a MacBook for my birthday. FML

by thanks for the $5 gift voucher / 06/13/2015 at 12:34pm / United States (North Carolina) / Kids

Today, a customer yelled, "I'll bash your fuckin' face in, cunt" at me at 9:30am because we don't serve the lunch menu at breakfast time. Yes, the 15-year-old girl in high school is responsible for McDonald's entire menu. FML

by McFuckYouTooCunt / 06/11/2015 at 9:44am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work

Today, I'm so deprived of intimacy that I got a raging boner when a waitress called me "hun". FML

by bonehead69 / 05/31/2015 at 3:06am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I went to a fancy beauty parlor to prepare for my sister's birthday party. The minute I stepped out of the salon, with my hair beautifully trimmed and curled, a bird decided to use it as a toilet. FML

by poophead / 05/29/2015 at 10:39pm / Philippines / Animals

Today, after being with my fiance for almost a decade, my future mother-in-law has been accusing me of being a gold digger because we want to buy a house together. She has conveniently forgotten her son was out of work for two years and I supported the both of us. FML

by BadGoldDigger / 05/26/2015 at 8:18am / United States / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I saw my uncle, whom I have not seen in five years, at a family gathering. His reaction to seeing me? "Holy SHIT you have BOOBS! The guys must be all over you!" I awkwardly replied, "No..." Then he muttered, "I know I would." FML

by WellThatWasRude / 05/25/2015 at 2:30am / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my friends made a little game out of my OCD. They like to purposely poke one of my arms so I immediately poke the other one. They think it's hilarious and now do it constantly. FML

by danceinconverse / 05/22/2015 at 4:11pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, we were discussing evolution at the super-religious school I'm forced to attend. I mentioned homo sapiens, and my teacher mockingly replied, "You actually believe in homo sapiens? Hahahah!" The whole class started laughing. No, not at the teacher; at me. FML

by homo fuckofftus / 05/22/2015 at 1:10pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I used a tanning bed for the first time ever, in an attempt to get a base tan for the summer. No one bothered to warn me that you shouldn't go the full ten minutes your first time. Now my skin is as red as my hair. FML

by missko519 / 05/22/2015 at 3:36am / United States (Oklahoma) / Health