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CH1CKEN_FL1PPEN

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CH1CKEN_FL1PPEN

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  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 565
  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Visits<b>zoegirl_455</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 3:14pm<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 3:56pm<b>Zomonster</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 10:44pm<b>AGhost5445</b> - the 06/03/2013 at 7:27pm<b>kurbanfan</b> - the 01/22/2013 at 9:24pm<b>KatiesSwaggin</b> - the 01/03/2013 at 11:05am<b>ArnoD</b> - the 01/03/2013 at 8:01am<b>icagoobo</b> - the 06/02/2011 at 8:18pm

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CH1CKEN_FL1PPEN's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out the medications my doctor gave me for depression are making me fat. My main reason for depression is an eating disorder. Now, I'm fat instead of just thinking I am. FML

#16683131
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33408) - you deserved it (5500)

On 06/15/2011 at 8:24pm - health - by DarkMaskDiva (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had a parent-teacher conference with my 8 year old son. He'd written "Chuck Norris" as the answer for every question on his test. FML

#16217085
441 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37101) - you deserved it (10100)

On 05/17/2011 at 12:54am - kids - by yobruh -

Today, I played Angry Birds for two hours. I got so into the game, I failed to remember that I was sitting on a public toilet. I only realized this when the janitor came to check on me. FML

#15901266
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10772) - you deserved it (47858)

On 04/23/2011 at 9:02pm - animals - by bobo - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while trying on an outfit in the dressing room at the mall, I got locked in. I decided to take 5 minutes to try and get out by crawling under the door. After I got out, I realized I left my cell phone, my purse and my pants inside. FML

#15900752
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10615) - you deserved it (30040)

On 04/23/2011 at 7:56pm - misc - by Niquesha (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, after a huge row with my best friend at school, I hid myself away in the bathroom and quietly sobbed to myself. A kid loudly busted into the stall next to me and took a minute-long shit that sounded like a hailstorm of bullets. The putrid stench made me retch and violently throw up everywhere. FML

#15580957
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32155) - you deserved it (6494)

On 03/31/2011 at 9:46pm - health - by Amy - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he stopped, got off, walked into the kitchen grabbed a doughnut, and came back to finish while he ate it. FML

#14813410
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33583) - you deserved it (6804)

On 02/02/2011 at 3:59pm - intimacy - by jessica - United States (Utah)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. She's a sock puppet. FML

#14802825
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18642) - you deserved it (64767)

On 02/01/2011 at 9:32pm - intimacy - by seepeezy32 -

Today, when I went to pick my kid up from daycare, I found out that he had run away. The rest of my afternoon consisted of me screaming his name, looking for him. I then returned to the daycare center. He thought it would be funny if he hid in the trash. FML

#14560893
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28320) - you deserved it (3286)

On 01/12/2011 at 11:42pm - kids - by tatortot7707 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I saw my boyfriend shaving his pubic hair before we had sex. This would be fine, except he was saying "Nom nom nom, I eat cock hairs" to his electric razor. FML

#13481200
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37951) - you deserved it (7988)

On 10/17/2010 at 1:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I received a 7 page text message during school from my mom yelling at me because I ate her cereal. FML

#13373250
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26370) - you deserved it (5261)

On 10/09/2010 at 12:39am - misc - by mylifesuckssss - United States

Today, whilst at my awards night, I got a boner, right as it was my turn to accept my award. To avoid a awkward situation, I flipped it up and under my belt. This failed to make the situation any less awkward, because the head of my penis poked out through my shirt, in plain view of the audience. FML

Today, I went to a zoo that had a gorilla in a cage. I walked up, and the gorilla stopped what he was doing, looked me in the eyes, and started jacking off. FML

#13005397
295 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38007) - you deserved it (9634)

On 09/11/2010 at 3:25pm - intimacy - by gorillalove - United States (Texas)



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