About CAGymnast : DOCTOR WHO. 'Nuff said.
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CAGymnast's favorite FMLs
by onthemarket / 09/08/2010 at 3:46pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Love
Today, my incredibly self conscious girlfriend decided to get over her fears and let me see her in her underwear. She did a short strip tease, crawled on top of me and asked what I thought. I couldn't think of anything to say besides, "Your bra and panties don't match." FML
by captainocd / 08/19/2010 at 3:16pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by beeee / 07/26/2010 at 12:03am / Australia / Love
Today, I was helping my friend create an online dating profile. When she got her search results, her #1 match was a blonde guy only 10 miles from her. His description: genuine, laid back, and ready for fun. He left off something kind of important. He's already married. To me. FML
by betrayed / 07/19/2010 at 1:36pm / United States (Missouri) / Love
by bigmikenyc / 07/15/2010 at 5:31am / United States / Transportation
by Mamasboyhater / 06/15/2010 at 5:50am / United States (California) / Love
Today, my shrink diagnosed me as severely depressive, due to a lot of stress and yells at home. After the session, my parents argued about whose fault it was and then went on to yell at me for being depressive and wasting their money. FML
by blah. / 04/05/2010 at 6:14am / Thailand (Krung Thep) / Health
Today, after being dumped just 48 hours prior, I awoke from a night of passionate lovemaking with my ex. Last night, he came to my house, romanced me, and presented a possible future. This morning, when I got up to use the restroom, my laptop, money, and ex-boyfriend were gone. FML
by Ennui / 02/20/2010 at 2:12pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by mrmr / 02/07/2010 at 1:32pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
Today, I told my best friend I was breaking up with my girlfriend of 3 years. He thought it would be funny to tell her I was going to propose to her that night. She showed up telling me how much she loves me and that when we get married how great it will be. FML
by anonymous / 01/29/2010 at 7:08pm / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 01/16/2010 at 11:44am / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy
Today, I received an email saying that the present I ordered for my girlfriend's birthday will be a week late, which makes it a week late for her birthday. I sat down and said we needed to talk, she burst into tears and apologised for 'sleeping with him,' I just wanted to tell her it would be late. FML
by in_side_out / 01/14/2010 at 6:26am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love
Today, I got a call from a girl I fell madly in love with 8 years ago. She disappeared from my life with no trace. Turns out she just finalized her divorce, has 2 wild kids, packed on 75 lbs, has $25,000 in debt and is taking meds to keep from going crazy. Now she wants me back. FML
by Anonymous / 12/28/2009 at 12:03am / United States (Arizona) / Love
Today, after spending the past 4 days asking both my husband and my father-in-law to salt our sidewalk, I slipped on the ice. I hit my head on our concrete stairs. While holding ice on my head, my father-in-law pats my head and says "I'll go get some salt." FML
by SnowyConcussion / 12/23/2009 at 9:30am / United States (Maryland) / Health
Today, I cleaned out my husband's drawer. He had kept every love letter I wrote him for the past 7 years. I smiled, struck by how romantic he was. My bliss was short-lived as I realized that he had also kept every single love letter his other lovers wrote him while we were married. FML
by loveletterbullcrap09 / 12/01/2009 at 3:22am / United States / Love
- Today, I’m in China, and I took my Golden Retriever to the groomer’s to get him cleaned up, because… Today, I’m in Sweden. This morning, I went out to get the mail in my pajamas. Well, it doesn’t only… Today, I was on an adult-orientated website when my mother entered the room. I closed the webpage…