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Offline (the 12/04/2016 at 10:35pm)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 29 December 1997 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1277
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About C00kiesNcream : I love my fiancé more than cupcakes 😍 and olives hehe
Future lawyer, future wife, future princess of world domination 😊
Men were made because vibrators can't mow the lawn😊
Sarcasm is the best policy. Honestly. 😒
Grammar Nazi 😒

C00kiesNcream's page activity

Visits<b>baxeh</b> - the 12/06/2016 at 7:17am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 11/19/2016 at 3:45am<b>TheAspieDork</b> - the 09/09/2016 at 11:53pm<b>Mons</b> - the 09/08/2016 at 11:13pm<b>darbmutat</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 10:42am<b>greamreaper</b> - the 07/05/2016 at 4:11pm<b>QualityChrisTime</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 10:50pm<b>onlyFuge17</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 1:43am<b>idkwyatt</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 2:00pm<b>gjuan93</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 1:56am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 2:04pm<b>DaviSal00</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 6:00pm<b>wheresmymary</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 7:06pm<b>rwal0912</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 9:08am<b>dominguez89</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 3:34am<b>doubledutchy</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 2:42am<b>a_wiener_d0g</b> - the 03/25/2016 at 9:41am<b>journeyboots</b> - the 03/17/2016 at 6:38pm

Fucked!<b>dominguez89</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 9:34am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 03/16/2016 at 4:54pm<b>Steve97</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 6:37am<b>watchfulsauce</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 11:58pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 11:46pm<b>orios105</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 8:40pm<b>lifeofpie25</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 5:04am<b>CelesteGomes</b> - the 12/06/2015 at 11:25am<b>HarshD9619</b> - the 10/19/2015 at 7:40pm<b>tiger820</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 6:08pm<b>steph2987</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 3:34pm<b>StormfrontX33</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 1:13am<b>MistyKittyx</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 2:54pm<b>Mmorpheus</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 2:48pm<b>Anno007</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 3:08pm<b>Mons</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 6:57pm<b>dewberry2001</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 9:40pm<b>ilovewhatthecut</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 4:23pm

C00kiesNcream's FML badges

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Santa Claus

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C00kiesNcream's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss joined me on my vacation, to "make sure I actually went". FML

by are you kidding me? / 05/16/2016 at 5:24pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, 5 minutes before I had to leave for school, my friends convinced me it was "pajama day" at school. I showed up in slippers and Sponge Bob pajamas. My school wouldn't let me go home to change. FML

by rhiannakirwan / 04/17/2016 at 2:48pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, on a train, a little boy and girl come up to me and ask how babies are made. Already pretty uncomfortable with their question, their mother suddenly appears and says, "Go on, tell them!" FML

by Anthony / 04/14/2016 at 7:15pm / France / Intimacy

Today, I'm beginning to regret explaining death to my 3-year-old son. We were at the supermarket when he looked at an elderly woman and loudly told her "You're gonna die soon!" FML

by mommyopps / 03/25/2016 at 10:14pm / United States (Minnesota) / Kids

Today, I explained to my five year-old son that the dinosaurs were wiped out because of a meteorite that hit our planet. He replied, "They should've stood out of the way." FML

by sauve dino. / 03/24/2016 at 11:12pm / Kids

Today, my dog hates my neighbor so much, she forms a shit barrier in their yard to keep them away from my house. FML

by gabimk23 / 03/23/2016 at 9:54am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I introduced my kind and amazing Iranian boyfriend to my mother. When he went to use the rest room, she warned me to "knock it off with this Bin Laden fetish" or she'll have me put on psychiatric hold. FML

by Anonymous / 03/05/2016 at 1:58am / Israel (Tel Aviv) / Love

Today, some guys came up to me at work so they could meet me in person after talking to me on Tinder. I don't have a Tinder account, though, and I have no idea who is doing this. FML

by Why me? / 03/05/2016 at 12:22am / United States (North Carolina) / Love

Today, the car across the street has been broken into so many times that my parrot has started to mimic its car alarm. FML

by Anonymous / 02/15/2016 at 12:04pm / United States (Oregon) / Animals

Today, I visited my boyfriend's uncle's house for a party. His 8 year old cousin started asking if I like penis, so my reaction was to laugh, spitting my drink on her and her new dress. She can't pronounce peanuts, and I can't visit anymore. FML

by me / 01/02/2016 at 3:25am / United States (Louisiana) / Kids

Today, my daughter asked me if we could adopt a child. I said no, since we can't afford to support another child. She then asked me if she could just adopt another dad instead. FML

by anon / 12/16/2015 at 10:28am / Australia (South Australia) / Kids

Today, my 4-year-old twin boys are fighting because they both want to watch the SAME show on Netflix. They don't want the other one to choose, because somehow that invalidates their own choice, even though they both get to watch what they want, which is "Barbie, life in the dream house". FML

by Anonymous / 11/25/2015 at 12:13pm / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, my six-year-old son told me how it was funny that there's "a food chicken and an animal chicken". That's going to be a fun one to explain to him. FML

by sydcaller618 / 11/23/2015 at 10:23pm / United States (Indiana) / Kids

Today, it's been two weeks since I got married. It's also two weeks since my husband got cold feet about moving in together, because he thinks the sudden change would be too emotionally distressing for his cat. FML

by unimpressed bride / 11/22/2015 at 1:10am / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, my boyfriend told me he took pictures of me while I was sleeping. Instead of it being all cute like you see on social media, there's me sleeping with his dirty-ass sock on my face and him smiling in the background. FML

by Anonymous / 11/19/2015 at 3:15am / United States (California) / Love