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ButterflyHaze

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ButterflyHaze

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2656
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About ButterflyHaze : west coast rower
🔥💧🐝🌲🍃🌰🌚🌝🌈🌊

ButterflyHaze's page activity

Visits<b>eaglerob</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 9:36pm<b>ROMAD</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 11:21am<b>hare</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 1:59am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 9:16pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 9:09am<b>metalfire10</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 12:05am<b>boxbrandon11</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 11:39am<b>Whiplash169</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 8:55am<b>jgilmanx13</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 7:44am<b>gummybeargirl</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 10:24am<b>Just_A_Tree</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 1:47am<b>jonnyscash</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 2:56am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 4:56pm<b>BBeffedmylife</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 10:32am<b>greaterdane</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 8:20am<b>nkb94</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 1:48am<b>hawkeyepeirce</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 11:21pm<b>cinskeep43</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 1:20am

Liked!<b>eaglerob</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 3:59pm

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ButterflyHaze's favorite FMLs

Today, I accidentally called my boss 'mom'. Now she is jokingly telling everyone that I'm the long-lost daughter she gave up for adoption, because she knew I'd be a failure. FML

#21304319
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17887) - you deserved it (2157)

On 11/23/2014 at 3:31am - work - by naladetet - United States (New Jersey)

Today, the girl I'd been dating online for 6 months told me she was a guy. I said it was alright, and that I was still in love. Then she confessed she really was a girl, and was just trying to make me dump her so she wouldn't be the "bad guy". FML

#21303306
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29554) - you deserved it (5544)

On 11/21/2014 at 1:18pm - love - by Recluse (man) -

Today, I realized that having an open relationship isn't all that great, when my boyfriend hooked up with his ex and dumped me for her. FML

#21303284
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22115) - you deserved it (13720)

On 11/21/2014 at 11:56am - love - by openended - United States (California)

Today, I was getting to second base with a really hot guy, but I couldn't stop laughing when he said my boobs were "soft like cake." He got so embarrassed that he lost his boner. FML

#21303170
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26972) - you deserved it (7489)

On 11/21/2014 at 4:56am - intimacy - by weirdthingtosay (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, a customer said the pants she was buying rang up more than advertised. I quietly told her plus-sizes were not on sale. The customer yelled in front of a whole line of people, "So I'm fat and can't read! Any other insults you'd like to throw at me?" and stormed out of the store. FML

#21301098
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30859) - you deserved it (3946)

On 11/17/2014 at 11:16pm - work - by HereToLaughAtU (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I heard my mother say, "I feel bad for any girl that marries him because he's, what's the word? Metrosexual!" To my girlfriend. About me. FML

#21300656
66 comments

Today, I was counselling a soon-to-be teen mom. She has a younger step-brother, and when I asked her how she handled him when he cries, she said, "Oh, that's when you cover their face until they stop!" FML

#21300330
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29434) - you deserved it (2038)

On 11/16/2014 at 9:25pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I sat my son down for a talk about how he's been too lazy to brush his teeth lately. I said "Son, we need to have a chat about oral hygiene." He rolled his eyes, sighed, and said he already knew to clean "it" before a girl went down on him, and asked if he could go already. FML

#21295420
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37052) - you deserved it (4652)

On 11/09/2014 at 1:23pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, I excitedly told my mom that I'm pregnant with my second child. She shot back, "You know what's a REAL achievement? Jacking your dad off in church last week without anyone noticing. Aim higher." I really didn't need to know that. FML

#21294899
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39347) - you deserved it (3399)

On 11/08/2014 at 6:02pm - kids - by jennabee97 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a character in the video game I was playing called my character a slut. My boyfriend ripped the controller from my hands, shot him dead, then fired the rest of my ammo into his corpse while yelling "FUCK YOU, BUDDY!" Good to know I'm dating a total lunatic. FML

#21293465
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32904) - you deserved it (6406)

On 11/06/2014 at 3:15pm - love - by notsofriendly (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my dad told me that my mom wanted to name me something "unusual." He eventually got her to compromise. I go by Violet. I now know that my legal name is Purple. FML

#21292947
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36152) - you deserved it (2404)

On 11/05/2014 at 8:12pm - misc - by Purple (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my mum yelled "Son of a bitch!" as I narrowly beat her at a game of Mario Kart. I jokingly yelled back "Hell yeah I am!" Now I'm grounded for two weeks, birthday included, all because my mum's a sore loser. FML

#21292742
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35025) - you deserved it (8506)

On 11/05/2014 at 2:52pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blowjob. I was laying in between his legs because it's just more comfortable. I looked down, and he had pieces of toilet paper sticking out of his butt cheeks. FML

#21291810
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41126) - you deserved it (6388)

On 11/04/2014 at 7:03am - intimacy - by anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. The words "Christ, Jeff. It's a vagina, not a burrito. CALM DOWN!" were spoken. FML

#21290417
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36041) - you deserved it (9858)

On 11/02/2014 at 10:36am - intimacy - by jay-frey96 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I saw what my mom handed out for trick-or-treaters last night. Toothbrushes. Yup, we're that house. FML

#21289931
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33623) - you deserved it (2797)

On 11/01/2014 at 6:22pm - kids - by ThaBoss12 - United States (California)



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