Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

BunchieRules

Offline (11 hours ago) | Search for a member

BunchieRules

3Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3266
  • Number of comments : 387
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About BunchieRules : My name? Bunchie Bunchison, FML's official Bunchie. I tend to insert many horrible puns in my comments, but you get used to them after a while.
First off, I am not a green llama.
I am one of an entire species of phallic-looking creatures whose ancestry spans for many centuries. I myself come from a long line of fellow Bunchies who all reside in a small town known as Bunchieville, Kansas. We are family friends with Dorothy and Auntie Em, and we happen to own a large wheat farm that has been passed down for many generations.
Each morning when the rooster crows, we youngins drive our tractors for several miles to a one-room schoolhouse. There, we learn about the many great Bunchies that shaped the world we currently live in. I am much older than this profile would lead you to believe; however, our Bunchie calendar is much more sophisticated than what you Earthlings rely on. Therefore, you puny humans cannot even measure how long I have existed.
Cheerio!

BunchieRules's page activity

Visits<b>NinjaDitto623</b> - 6 hours ago<b>charliedee</b> - yesterday at 10:43pm<b>Ghost_Kaulitz</b> - yesterday at 2:39pm<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 1:45am<b>captainsmegma</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 9:58pm<b>lolzalolliepop</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 9:46am<b>devildog562</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 10:52pm<b>JuliaaNoelle</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 10:17pm<b>madridista14</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 7:19pm<b>GottaLove1D</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 10:37pm<b>grimpeeper</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 9:49pm<b>RaspberryFlower</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 7:47pm<b>LikeYouGiveAShit</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 10:40pm<b>imapartypooper</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 5:40am<b>Lexasaurus7</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 11:12pm<b>quickit</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 3:15pm<b>victoria63</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 1:26pm<b>WeLikeIke</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 6:38am

Liked!<b>quickit</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 9:15pm<b>LikeYouGiveAShit</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 10:48am<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 6:48am

BunchieRules's FML badges

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

See all of BunchieRules's badges

BunchieRules's favorite FMLs

Today, we had a guy come into the hospital with a carrot stuck deep in his anus. I've heard all kinds of ridiculous cover stories, but his took the cake; he claimed the phone rang while he was showering and he slipped onto a box of vegetables. Guess who had to extract the carrot. FML

#21179512
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52452) - you deserved it (4608)

On 06/18/2014 at 3:06pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my brother called me, asking if I could help him do his taxes. Since he's a high school and college dropout, I thought all I had to do was a 1040EZ. No, last year he made more than twice what I earn, through self-employment. I have two Master's degrees and work at Burger King. FML

#20527434
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33087) - you deserved it (8094)

On 03/01/2013 at 9:35pm - misc - by tax-man - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she could not stand the thought of being in a relationship with a man who wears orange. This is the first time I've worn an orange shirt in at least 6 months. FML

#20521313
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32157) - you deserved it (3189)

On 02/25/2013 at 3:33am - love - by vat (man) - Hong Kong

Today, I lit my beard on fire while trying to light a cigarette driving to work. I got fired from work when I got there because of my appearance. FML

#20507167
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12901) - you deserved it (40497)

On 02/14/2013 at 8:55pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, a girl came up to me on the street and said, "You have like no swag, bro." Feeling clever, I said, "At least I have a high school education." She then took out her work ID, showing me that she was a surgeon, flipped me off, then walked away saying, "This is totally going on Facebook." FML

#20502122
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29621) - you deserved it (27424)

On 02/11/2013 at 10:26am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I desperately needed to pee, so I decided to confront my anxiety issues and use a public toilet. I opened the lid, only to see several huge, rancid floaters staring back at me. I had an attack, started sobbing, and pissed myself on the way home. Never again. FML

#20489333
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27982) - you deserved it (8477)

On 02/01/2013 at 6:53pm - misc - by VMV (woman) - Spain (Catalonia)

Today, I tripped while walking down a large flight of stairs. As I fell forward, I instinctively reached out and grabbed onto one of the guys walking up. I ended up taking him and two other people down with me, earning myself a great many disgusted glares as I dusted myself off. FML

#20489268
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22658) - you deserved it (7122)

On 02/01/2013 at 5:53pm - health - by Awkward (man) - United Kingdom (Wolverhampton)

Today, I was laughing at a girl who really sucks at badminton. Turns out she has anger issues, and a really good aim when she's mad. I've never been hit so hard in the crotch before. FML

#20450098
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9727) - you deserved it (58525)

On 01/09/2013 at 2:27pm - misc - by Anon - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I went on a blind date. As soon as my date saw me walking towards him, he checked his watch and said, "Oops, wrong place." Then walked right past me. FML

#20442057
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21734) - you deserved it (2199)

On 01/04/2013 at 1:12am - love - by Tiffosaur - United States

Today, I woke up with an engagement ring on my left hand. The same one I refused last month. My boyfriend apparently waited for me to be drunk to propose again last night, and has already posted the pics on Facebook. FML

#20427625
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38303) - you deserved it (14550)

On 12/28/2012 at 10:14am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, it was my first time at the club. I saw a really cute girl. I finally worked up the courage to ask her to dance. Before I even got within five feet of her, she looked me in the eyes and vehemently shook her head. I did a 180. My friends saw everything. They are still laughing. FML

#20413213
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36050) - you deserved it (4172)

On 12/22/2012 at 6:21am - misc - by divingconfidence (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, as a pizza delivery guy, I was forced to see yet another naked 200 pound teenage girl with a serious case of body acne. They're starting to give me nightmares. FML

#20081849
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26893) - you deserved it (3128)

On 09/21/2012 at 6:57am - work - by scarred for life - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I dropped a whole batch of penis-shaped cookies on the floor. Then I thought, "5-second rule" and started eating them. And then I realized that I was home alone, in pajamas, eating broken dick-cookies off the floor. FML

#20081762
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22607) - you deserved it (12539)

On 09/21/2012 at 3:31am - misc - by RawrSparkle (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was in traffic court trying to get out of a ticket. The judge called my defense "complete, unadulterated bullshit." FML

#19918441
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6987) - you deserved it (26885)

On 07/10/2012 at 11:39am - misc - by mustanggt (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my grandmother threatened to kill herself with a banana. She then got angry with me when I didn't attempt to get the banana away from her. My mom punished me because I didn't take the situation seriously enough. FML

#19806269
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28739) - you deserved it (2890)

On 06/18/2012 at 7:38am - misc - by DwarfFrog - United States



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: