About Bud : Don't rly know what to say
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
Profile completed
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I was on a date with this guy I just met and we went to a fancy restaurant. Halfway through the meal, there was an awkward silence, and he decided to end it by saying "You know, you chew like a cow." FML
I agree, your life sucks (3894) - you deserved it (1003)
On 05/17/2013 at 10:59pm - love - by moo... -
Today, my friend told me she'd lost her notebook filled with crucial notes for our finals. She asked if she could borrow mine and copy my notes. She then lost my notebook too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4327) - you deserved it (930)
On 05/17/2013 at 6:28pm - misc - by well great. - United States (Mississippi)
Today, I was in a big Skype chat, which somehow turned into a heated argument. My friend lost it, typed "your stupid" and called me a "looser." When I pointed out the irony of his messages, he rage-quit, drove all the way to my house, and punched me in the face at the door. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21807) - you deserved it (5504)
On 05/17/2013 at 5:16pm - health - by -1 friend (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I got a mosquito bite inside my cast. I slipped a ruler into it and started scratching to relieve the itch. Part of the ruler ended up snapping off inside. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18814) - you deserved it (6163)
On 05/17/2013 at 4:49pm - health - by sprainedankle - Saudi Arabia (Ar Riyad)
Today, my brother tried to convince me to get a clitoris piercing at his recently opened piercing studio. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23055) - you deserved it (1792)
On 05/17/2013 at 12:40pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Varmlands Lan)
Today, while walking home with my boyfriend, he jokingly slapped my butt. A man as old as my dad drove by, yelled "Wooo, spank that ass! DAMN!" and kept leering at me before finally driving off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19321) - you deserved it (2218)
On 05/17/2013 at 12:16pm - misc - by jessinono (woman) - United States
Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus". FML
I agree, your life sucks (25977) - you deserved it (1602)
On 05/17/2013 at 11:52am - misc - by Sonofa - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my little brother gave me a candy bar for my birthday. After I ate the entire thing, he told me it was Ex-Lax and that I needed it because I'm "so full of shit". FML
I agree, your life sucks (27437) - you deserved it (4327)
On 05/17/2013 at 8:04am - misc - by Unlucky Individual - United States (California)
Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad used to stalk when he was in high school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27204) - you deserved it (1541)
On 05/17/2013 at 5:25am - misc - by Jololol - United States
Today, I tried on a new perfume. When my boyfriend hugged me, he commented that I smelled like his mom. I don't know who was more surprised by the simultaneous bulge in his pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28556) - you deserved it (2062)
On 05/17/2013 at 3:21am - intimacy - by Uncomfortable (woman) -
Today, my family and friends decided to throw a surprise party for my 16th birthday. I was so surprised that the shortness of breath triggered a serious asthma attack. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25432) - you deserved it (1956)
On 05/17/2013 at 12:35am - misc - by presente13 (woman) - United States
Today, I stepped out of the kitchen to yell at my kids for running in the house. I had just mopped the floor, and did not want them to fall. I fell while yelling and twisted my ankle. At least they know it's dangerous now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24382) - you deserved it (5217)
On 05/16/2013 at 5:50pm - kids - by meepdaleap - United States (Virginia)
Today, I got a mosquito bite on my chest. Due to a severe allergic reaction it has swollen my left breast a cup size. The first thing my boyfriend said was, "Hey look! I can finally see one of them." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29010) - you deserved it (2494)
On 05/16/2013 at 5:36pm - intimacy - by Urgghh (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, I took my girlfriend to a family dinner. Things went great, until my grandma arrived. She thought it would be okay to continue our friendly prank war by congratulating me on my "wife's" pregnancy. My girlfriend actually believed it, and now thinks she's the "other woman". FML
I agree, your life sucks (34319) - you deserved it (3393)
On 05/16/2013 at 5:23pm - love - by paging dr. kevorkian (man) - Netherlands
Today, I attended a cooking class with my co-workers. As the chef prepared to cut up a load of onions for his dish, he warned us to be ready for the "typical reactions". Everyone teared up. Meanwhile, I popped a boner. So much for typical. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29038) - you deserved it (4870)
On 05/16/2013 at 4:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
