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BruBlonde

Offline (the 02/19/2015 at 4:24pm) | Search for a member

BruBlonde

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Friday 6 June 1986 (28 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1596
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About BruBlonde : screw it

BruBlonde's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

See all of BruBlonde's badges

BruBlonde's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm here to inform men that, "If I fucked you, I wouldn't pull out" is not an effective pick up line. Ever. Especially on a coworker. FML

#21349737
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31342) - you deserved it (4717)

On 02/04/2015 at 3:17pm - intimacy - by No thank you (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I walked in on my husband jacking off to a photo of himself. FML

#21346857
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33832) - you deserved it (3153)

On 01/30/2015 at 3:16pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while begging my wife for sex for once, she told me she didn't have time. I said it wouldn't take long. She said "I know." FML

#21341633
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31088) - you deserved it (9709)

On 01/21/2015 at 2:06pm - intimacy - by cuckolddreams - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was lying in bed with my girlfriend. Trying to be romantic, I complimented her on how nice her hair smelled. She replied: "Yeah? Wait till you smell this." then let out the vilest, most nauseating fart I'd ever smelled in my life. FML

#21330185
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34537) - you deserved it (6159)

On 01/03/2015 at 7:23pm - love - by allgassedout (man) - United States (California)

Today, my step-dad explained to me why he doesn't need to wash his body. He condescendingly said, "Well when you shampoo your hair, the soap runs down your body and cleans everything." He's 37 years old. FML

#21329998
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29082) - you deserved it (2387)

On 01/03/2015 at 4:16pm - health - by Chicagoillinois (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time in over a month. When I came, I thrust one last time and let out a huge fart. She couldn't keep her mouth shut about it, and now all our friends keep calling me "CumFart". FML

#21329462
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33965) - you deserved it (6791)

On 01/02/2015 at 4:53pm - intimacy - by I'll Make You FartCum (man) - United States (California)

Today, I witnessed my very overweight cat trying to jump over my fence, only to shit himself half way up, and then land in it. FML

Today, my boyfriend bought me some feminine cleansing wipes for my birthday so I could, "get the hoo-ha spick-and-span." FML

#21309102
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33431) - you deserved it (5780)

On 11/30/2014 at 10:32pm - intimacy - by fishtacos (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my dad told me someday I'll find a man who wants a nice lumberjack for a wife. FML

#21279635
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31300) - you deserved it (3020)

On 10/17/2014 at 4:14am - love - by axewoman -

Today, my loving five-year-old daughter started singing Christmas carols again. Ones that she made up herself, of course. Including "Walking in a fucking wonderland" and "Rudolph the red nosed asshole". FML

Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my vagina. He replied, "What's that?" FML

#21271608
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37219) - you deserved it (16420)

On 10/05/2014 at 10:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got on one knee in front of my girlfriend. I pulled out the ring, uttered the words "Lisa, will you..." then abruptly shat my pants. FML

#21271177
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42687) - you deserved it (5147)

On 10/05/2014 at 11:47am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went on a blind date that my friend set up. He greeted me with a winning smile, a belch, and the words, "Nice tits." I'm beginning to lose hope. FML

#21265612
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34440) - you deserved it (3235)

On 09/26/2014 at 2:56am - love - by bri_sci94 - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I sat in on a university-level physics lecture, listening to my hyped-up co-students approximating the hypothetical situation of the Sun consisting of gerbils. The conversation then continued towards how much better energy/mass ratio the gerbil-sun would have compared to the actual star. FML

#21258867
89 comments


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