Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

BruBlonde

Offline (yesterday at 5:20am) | Search for a member

BruBlonde

1Fucked!

BruBlondeBruBlonde
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Friday 6 June 1986 (29 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2539
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About BruBlonde : screw it

BruBlonde's page activity

Visits<b>Rnbw_Uncrn</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 4:58am<b>DA_JUDGE123</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 10:52pm<b>kitkat818</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 3:09am<b>erin55378</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 2:32am

Fucked!<b>kitkat818</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 9:09am

BruBlonde's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of BruBlonde's badges

BruBlonde's favorite FMLs

Today, after a 4 or 5 month-long dry spell, I woke up next to an amazing and beautiful woman. Neither of us were wearing pants. She looked me in the eyes and said, "Did I piss the bed?" FML

#21448401
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23706) - you deserved it (2825)

On 07/28/2015 at 2:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I tried talking to my wife about our sexless marriage. Her only response was to toss me a sock and say "Knock yourself out, fuckstick." FML

#21422165
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28676) - you deserved it (3184)

On 06/07/2015 at 3:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I tried to work on my attitude at work. People say I'm mean, so I tried to be nice all day. Apparently I'm now condescending. FML

#21415518
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24407) - you deserved it (3460)

On 05/25/2015 at 1:42pm - work - by Frustrated - United States

Today, I got yelled at for 'letting' my muddy dog jump on my cousin's wedding dress as she was getting ready. I don't own a dog and haven't since I was a kid. FML

#21404425
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31034) - you deserved it (2003)

On 05/04/2015 at 10:49am - animals - by FMe - United Kingdom

Today, my husband came too soon during sex. He then tried to pretend it didn't happen and continued. He humped me with a half-erect noodle for about seven minutes before I finally called him out. FML

#21394468
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32499) - you deserved it (4940)

On 04/16/2015 at 1:04am - intimacy - by Evra (woman) - United States

Today, I have been at my new job for almost a month and still have no idea what I'm doing. FML

#21367094
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27294) - you deserved it (10811)

On 03/03/2015 at 5:15am - work - by soconfused (woman) - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, a man asked me for directions outside of a local store. After about five minutes into the conversation, I noticed he had whipped his penis out and was stroking it. He then asked me if I liked what I saw. FML

#21362166
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39489) - you deserved it (3471)

On 02/23/2015 at 10:46pm - intimacy - by sammy18f (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I'm here to inform men that, "If I fucked you, I wouldn't pull out" is not an effective pick up line. Ever. Especially on a coworker. FML

#21349737
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34999) - you deserved it (5695)

On 02/04/2015 at 3:17pm - intimacy - by No thank you (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I walked in on my husband jacking off to a photo of himself. FML

#21346857
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38625) - you deserved it (4159)

On 01/30/2015 at 3:16pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while begging my wife for sex for once, she told me she didn't have time. I said it wouldn't take long. She said "I know." FML

#21341633
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34297) - you deserved it (10686)

On 01/21/2015 at 2:06pm - intimacy - by cuckolddreams - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was lying in bed with my girlfriend. Trying to be romantic, I complimented her on how nice her hair smelled. She replied: "Yeah? Wait till you smell this." then let out the vilest, most nauseating fart I'd ever smelled in my life. FML

#21330185
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36602) - you deserved it (6884)

On 01/03/2015 at 7:23pm - love - by allgassedout (man) - United States (California)

Today, my step-dad explained to me why he doesn't need to wash his body. He condescendingly said, "Well when you shampoo your hair, the soap runs down your body and cleans everything." He's 37 years old. FML

#21329998
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31424) - you deserved it (2694)

On 01/03/2015 at 4:16pm - health - by Chicagoillinois (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time in over a month. When I came, I thrust one last time and let out a huge fart. She couldn't keep her mouth shut about it, and now all our friends keep calling me "CumFart". FML

#21329462
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37726) - you deserved it (8382)

On 01/02/2015 at 4:53pm - intimacy - by I'll Make You FartCum (man) - United States (California)

Today, I witnessed my very overweight cat trying to jump over my fence, only to shit himself half way up, and then land in it. FML

Today, my boyfriend bought me some feminine cleansing wipes for my birthday so I could, "get the hoo-ha spick-and-span." FML

#21309102
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36286) - you deserved it (6296)

On 11/30/2014 at 10:32pm - intimacy - by fishtacos (woman) - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: