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Brooklynxman

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Brooklynxman
  • Town/Country : Brooklyn
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 27 March 1989 (25 years)
  • Number of visits : 19079
  • Number of comments : 168
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Brooklynxman's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that, if timed just right, the alarm function on my phone can be disabled by a text message. And my dad has an impeccable sense of timing. I was 20 minutes late for work. FML

#7974349
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21681) - you deserved it (2679)

On 02/07/2010 at 1:58pm - work - by Ishii (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I forgot it was her birthday. We had only been dating for 2 weeks. I didn't even know when it was. FML

#7974279
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26287) - you deserved it (7023)

On 02/07/2010 at 1:56pm - love - by jake (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my maid washed my PS3. Yes, with soap and water. FML

Today, we had our friends over for dinner, one of whom is a psychiatrist. After a few drinks, my drunk wife and the equally drunk psychiatrist began to analyze my various character flaws. FML

#7969441
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20111) - you deserved it (2321)

On 02/07/2010 at 10:37am - misc - by bystander (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I cut my finger at work while chopping some vegetables. I grabbed the nearest rag I could to stop the bleeding and put it on the cut. I didn't know the rag had just been used to clean up a lemon juice spill. FML

#7967953
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27628) - you deserved it (2948)

On 02/07/2010 at 9:18am - work - by Ryan - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was racing some mates to the beach and I decided to take a short-cut by jumping over a low wall. I didn't realise the wall was to stop people falling into the stormwater drain. Which is 3 metres deep. And has razor-sharp oysters growing at the bottom. FML

#7965104
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14153) - you deserved it (31708)

On 02/07/2010 at 4:19am - misc - by KiwiBlam (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend of one week is suicidal and crazy about me. She showed me that she carved her old boyfriends name in her arm and she threatened suicide if I ever left her. FML

#7962571
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37238) - you deserved it (3356)

On 02/07/2010 at 2:16am - love - by mike (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I found out my mom pretended to be me and had AIM conversations with my boyfriend. FML

#7957934
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29664) - you deserved it (2410)

On 02/07/2010 at 12:15am - love - by nekoneko (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I work at McDonalds. I burned my hand while cleaning their grill and have a 2nd/3rd degree burn from my pinky to my wrist. When told about this, my manager told me that there was "nothing that they could do for me and to tough it out". However I was given a free McFlurry. FML

#7948337
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25669) - you deserved it (4095)

On 02/06/2010 at 8:19pm - work - by Enrique (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, it dawned on me that the most romantic thing my husband has done in the last three years, was a put a wedding ring on his xbox avatar. FML

#7945898
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19859) - you deserved it (2644)

On 02/06/2010 at 7:09pm - love - by browniepoints (woman) - United States (California)

Today, there was a new and extremely attractive girl at youth group, so I decided to introduce myself. Her reply was, "Wow, I've always wanted to meet a gay guy!" FML

#7937064
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28499) - you deserved it (3719)

On 02/06/2010 at 1:39pm - love - by Richard - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend of two years said he would finally take me somewhere romantic. I spent my day at a Star Wars convention. FML

#7936771
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21689) - you deserved it (5738)

On 02/06/2010 at 1:29pm - love - by cherrycokeee - Sent from mobile version

Today, my mother told me that the carbon-monoxide alarm went off last night, but since she didn't smell any gas, she decided to just remove the batteries and go back to bed. I had to explain to her that you can't smell carbon monoxide, and that we could have died in our sleep. FML

#7936537
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35528) - you deserved it (1562)

On 02/06/2010 at 1:22pm - misc - by Kelso (woman) - United States

Today, I took my cat to the vet. He said he felt a strange lump that could be serious. I got really upset and picked her up, crying. The vet then told me I had to put her down. Absolutely devastated by having to euthanize my cat, I passed out. He meant I had to put her back on the table. FML

#7932396
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22441) - you deserved it (11988)

On 02/06/2010 at 10:19am - animals - by sadcat (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my little sister asked me what she would look like when she got older. I told her that she would probably look a lot like me. She started to cry. FML

#7927518
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25592) - you deserved it (2755)

On 02/06/2010 at 3:15am - kids - by Misty3242 (woman) - United States (California)



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