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Brooklynxman

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Brooklynxman
  • Town/Country : Brooklyn
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 27 March 1989 (25 years)
  • Number of visits : 19190
  • Number of comments : 168
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Brooklynxman's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at one of the urinals in a bathroom. A chubby kid goes to the urinal next to mine and starts peeing violently. Apparently, he was peeing so violently that it splashed onto my legs the whole time. I've picked the wrong day to wear shorts. FML

#8038027
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19984) - you deserved it (2006)

On 02/09/2010 at 12:27am - misc - by wurtabang - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got called out of class to talk to some cops. Turns out my car was involved in a hit and run accident, while I was in school and there was no possible way it could have been me. But since they have no one else, it's my fault. FML

#8031380
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24712) - you deserved it (1357)

On 02/08/2010 at 10:29pm - misc - by sweeeeet (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I noticed that my neighbor's house has a clear view of my daughter's bathroom. There is a telescope in his window. FML

#8021510
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29508) - you deserved it (1864)

On 02/08/2010 at 7:28pm - misc - by disasterbutton (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I visited my grandmother who has dementia. She thought I was my father, and told me that I should never have married my mother, let alone have had children with her. FML

#8012707
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21332) - you deserved it (1421)

On 02/08/2010 at 2:30pm - misc - by dmachin - Sent from mobile version

Today, while on my way to the break room, it seemed as if everyone was staring at me and giving me odd looks. I asked my friend, "Did I get prettier overnight or something?" She answered, "No, your shirt is just see-through." FML

#8011432
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6836) - you deserved it (18889)

On 02/08/2010 at 1:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got ice cream with a guy I'd met at a wrestling match a few days ago. When I got home, I found out that my mother had been sitting in the parking lot and watched us through the windows. FML

#8011399
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23464) - you deserved it (2242)

On 02/08/2010 at 1:23pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my wife told me that she wants a divorce. Apparently, I'm taking too long to forgive her for having an affair. FML

#8007252
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42442) - you deserved it (3352)

On 02/08/2010 at 9:18am - love - by DD - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boss asked me if I could work on Valentine's Day because there was no chance of me having a date. She's right. FML

#8007090
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30006) - you deserved it (2755)

On 02/08/2010 at 9:07am - love - by klala - Reserved

Today, my boyfriend, who hasn't shaved in a month, went to go shave. I was pretty excited since his beard was starting to make my face itch whenever we kissed. When he came out of the bathroom he had a handlebar mustache. FML

#8001805
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22963) - you deserved it (6536)

On 02/08/2010 at 1:58am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend, who hasn't shaved in a month, went to go shave. I was pretty excited since his beard was starting to make my face itch whenever we kissed. When he came out of the bathroom he had a handlebar mustache. FML

#8001805
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22963) - you deserved it (6536)

On 02/08/2010 at 1:58am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend, who hasn't shaved in a month, went to go shave. I was pretty excited since his beard was starting to make my face itch whenever we kissed. When he came out of the bathroom he had a handlebar mustache. FML

#8001805
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22963) - you deserved it (6536)

On 02/08/2010 at 1:58am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out the hard way that my boyfriend occasionally wets the bed. He's 25 and we're moving in together next month. FML

#7998625
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19282) - you deserved it (2424)

On 02/08/2010 at 12:41am - love - by mmvv - United States

Today, I found out that the man I met online was a fake Facebook account, made by my daughter and her friends. FML

#7997693
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28956) - you deserved it (6531)

On 02/08/2010 at 12:21am - love - by cupcakemonsteryu - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out the love of my life, my husband, is cheating on me. When I confronted him about it, his response was, "Don't blame me, you're the gullible bitch." FML

#7992828
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37948) - you deserved it (3311)

On 02/07/2010 at 11:03pm - love - by Hm (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my son learned about various animals in school, and how they urinate to mark their territory. Apparently, the entire second floor of my house is now my son's territory. FML

#7981374
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26777) - you deserved it (2209)

On 02/07/2010 at 7:35pm - kids - by grrrr - United States



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