Brittney_E

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Brittney_E

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11107
  • Number of comments : 417
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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Brittney_E's page activity

Visits<b>Sansational_</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 2:43pm<b>frnk</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 4:13pm<b>ballsacks33</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 11:27am<b>Rich531</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 12:12pm<b>maariyah</b> - the 12/23/2015 at 11:37pm<b>player20270</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 6:51am<b>kittykat1501</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 11:26pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 6:08pm<b>lushgum</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 1:46pm<b>Killiannnn</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 10:12am<b>fuckercakes</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 5:25pm<b>thes7274473</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 12:51am<b>ragingatheist</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 7:53pm<b>jellybear28</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 7:54pm<b>CurvyisCool</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 11:27pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/27/2013 at 4:19pm<b>greeneyebeauty9</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 2:41pm<b>niatross</b> - the 11/25/2013 at 6:54am

Brittney_E's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Brittney_E's favorite FMLs

Today, I found a video of my girlfriend having sex with her male best friend on her computer. When I confronted her about it she said it was from before we met. In the video, she was wearing the engagement ring I bought her. FML

by Anonymous / 09/27/2010 at 11:20am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I was playing with my dog, teasing her, to cheer myself up after being dumped by my girlfriend. My dog bit me hard and I had to go to hospital. The dog has to be put down. FML

by Anonymous / 09/27/2010 at 9:17am / Australia (Queensland) / Animals

Today, I was robbed of five bucks by a vending machine that said "Enjoy Life!" FML

by lovelife / 09/27/2010 at 9:09am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I went on a first date to the movies. During the flick, I choked on a piece of popcorn. I took a gulp of soda and that got stuck as well. I finally got my breath back and let out the loudest burp I ever have. He looked at me and said "Does this mean I can fart now?" FML

by Anonymous / 09/27/2010 at 7:45am / United States (New Hampshire) / Love

Today, I tried to get over my childhood phobia of syringes by donating blood. The phlebotomist hadn't even touched the needle before I started sobbing hysterically. They made me leave. FML

by Anonymous / 09/27/2010 at 3:03am / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, my grad student husband was unusually frisky in the middle of the day. I took the opportunity and we had an enjoyable afternoon romp. Afterward, I asked him what had gotten him in such a good mood. He replied, "I'd do just about anything to get out of doing my homework." FML

by amorousintx / 09/26/2010 at 7:58pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I learned that my girlfriend gives good head. I didn't find out by getting one, I found out by my drunk best friend telling me. FML

by Anonymous / 09/26/2010 at 7:52pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy

Today, while working at McDonald's, a woman asked me what came on a bacon, egg, and cheese biscuit. Trying not to laugh, I respond, "Bacon, egg, and cheese." She then realizes the stupidity of her question, and launches three dollars worth of quarters at my face and says, "Laugh at that, jerk." FML

by lyssuhhhh / 09/26/2010 at 7:14pm / United States (Ohio) / Work

Today, I found out that my best friend's mom doesn't wear pyjamas when I got up to go get a glass of water in the middle of the night, at the same time she did. FML

by Anonymous / 09/26/2010 at 1:45am / United States (North Dakota) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in the bathroom stall when a man made eye-contact with me through the cracks. I quickly looked away, and about a minute later I looked back to see if he was gone. He was still there and was actually trying to keep making eye-contact with me while I pooped. FML

by Anonymous / 09/25/2010 at 11:00pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was trying to apply some toothpaste on my pimple to help dry it out. My mum came from behind and hugged me, making me accidentally apply minty toothpaste into my right eye instead. FML

by Anonymous / 09/25/2010 at 10:45am / Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was trying to apply some toothpaste on my pimple to help dry it out. My mum came from behind and hugged me, making me accidentally apply minty toothpaste into my right eye instead. FML

by Anonymous / 09/25/2010 at 10:45am / Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a cold and was vomiting. I sneezed really hard, smacking my nose onto the toilet seat. I woke up a few minutes later with my nose bleeding, painful, and still stuffy. FML

by Anonymous / 09/24/2010 at 10:35pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health

Today, my friend asked why I always smell like a dead animal carcass. I have no idea. FML

by Anonymous / 09/24/2010 at 7:10pm / United States (Colorado) / Health

Today, I let out the most horrific, loudest, and most vile smelling fart I have ever had in my life while in the middle of yoga class. Out of embarrassment, I tried to lessen the tension in the silent room by giggling, but no one saw the funny side. I was given looks of horror, and avoided by everyone else for the rest of the class. FML

by yogapants / 09/24/2010 at 4:21pm / Switzerland (Zurich) / Health