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Breezeblocks_

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Breezeblocks_

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 126
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Breezeblocks_ : i like this website because it makes me feel better

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Breezeblocks_'s favorite FMLs

Today, I was cleaning a pocketknife when I noticed a spider on my leg. My first reaction was to stab it. FML

#20974086
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40674) - you deserved it (41243)

On 11/28/2013 at 9:05pm - misc - by OuchImAMoron (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was quite drunk so I decided to take a piss kneeling down, so I wouldn't miss. I dropped the toilet seat on my little soldier. FML

Today, I got my dad to fill in a questionnaire my teacher handed out on Friday. One question said "I would like to see my son/daughter ______." My dad wrote in the blank: "less often." FML

#20961005
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46973) - you deserved it (4068)

On 11/17/2013 at 3:27pm - kids - by :( (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got a concussion. It was when an entire shelf of bicycle helmets tumbled onto my skull. FML

#20954433
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37179) - you deserved it (2728)

On 11/11/2013 at 9:14pm - health - by myheadhurts (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I learned I was conceived to the sounds of a Spice Girls album. FML

#20954288
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34553) - you deserved it (3800)

On 11/11/2013 at 6:58pm - misc - by queenxalee (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my wife and I were watching Killing Kennedy. Jokingly, I said, "Spoiler alert: he dies." She threw a book at me and won't talk to me. I think she's serious. FML

#20953867
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44876) - you deserved it (6905)

On 11/11/2013 at 12:20pm - misc - by Thomas - United States (Virginia)

Today, while teaching juniors about black holes, I said, "Imagine everything being sucked into a black hole." An African-American student shouted, "I'd better start clenching!" Nobody took the lesson seriously after that. FML

#20946225
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43017) - you deserved it (5217)

On 11/05/2013 at 8:22am - work - by regretsteachinghighschool - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my husband was getting undressed. I told my 2-year-old daughter not to go in our bedroom because he was undressing in there. I turned my back and she instantly ran off to my bedroom. I heard her shout "I can see daddy's tail!" Now, she points to everyone's crotch and shouts "TAIL!" FML

#20943580
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49243) - you deserved it (6322)

On 11/03/2013 at 9:22am - kids - by KittyKat (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, my 8-year-old came home from school crying. Apparently her teacher told the whole class to write about how they felt when they learned that Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy weren't real. FML

#20942077
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52723) - you deserved it (5226)

On 11/02/2013 at 12:19am - kids - by SantaClaus - United States (California)

Today, I was leaving the grocery store when an old woman started yelling at me for not holding the door open for her. She accused me of being "everything wrong with the younger generation". It was an automatic door. FML

#20937007
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43946) - you deserved it (2921)

On 10/28/2013 at 5:53pm - misc - by Greg (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, as a science teacher, I did a science experiment in front of a class. One of my students asked me if it was "photoshopped." He was being serious. FML

#20930096
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42109) - you deserved it (2815)

On 10/22/2013 at 10:24am - kids - by jdawn99 - United States (Kansas)

Today, I got a call from my daughter’s school today. She had been telling the teacher, "I have a huge boner." Apparently, some of the kids at school told her it meant 'headache' and she's been saying it all day. FML

#20928358
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41184) - you deserved it (3152)

On 10/20/2013 at 11:51pm - kids - by momaaa1342 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I figured out my 1-year-old daughter likes to dip her hand in our dogs' water bowl, and rub the water on her face. So I put the water bowl out of reach. She then figured out how to open the bathroom door and use the toilet instead. FML

#20918462
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39338) - you deserved it (4010)

On 10/13/2013 at 1:51am - misc - by Water Daughter - United States

Today, I was working a kid's birthday party dressed as a clown. The child's mother made me change because he was scared of clowns. The only thing I had in my car was a princess costume that was owned by a girl co-worker. So for 4 hours I had to entertain in a tight pink dress. I'm a guy. FML

#20913049
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41551) - you deserved it (4446)

On 10/08/2013 at 9:19pm - kids - by Allycat (man) - United States (New York)



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