About BreathlessInk : hi i'm sarah and i'm short
BreathlessInk's FML badges
You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
A new Thumb
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
BreathlessInk's favorite FMLs
Today, I found out why I receive random drug tests at work. The safety department was specifically told by my boss to check up on me because I always seem way too cheerful to not be high. I've passed every single test. FML
by Ineedlotsofwater / 01/23/2015 at 11:41am / United States (Washington) / Work
by Discouraged / 01/06/2015 at 3:36pm / Canada (Ontario) / Geek
Today, I went to celebrate Thanksgiving with my family. I watched as my uncle and his girlfriend snuck off to the bathroom together, where they stayed until someone else tried to get in. When they came out, she was wiping her mouth. I need new eyes. FML
by Trainer Calypso / 11/27/2014 at 3:38pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy
Today, I was at Sea World and was about to take a picture of the big walrus. I noticed my phone was still set to use the front camera, and I muttered "Oops, selfie mode." A guy next to me turned, looked at me, and said "Not like there's a difference for you." FML
Today, I walked into my apartment and smelled something extremely repugnant. I asked my roommate what had happened and she said, "I didn't know how else to kill it!" She'd trapped a bat that was in our apartment, put it in the oven, and set it to 400 degrees. FML
by BakedBat / 02/20/2014 at 11:10pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
- « Previous page
- Next page »
- Today, I went into the women's bathroom and was warmly greeted by a man masturbating on one of the… Today, while having sex with my husband, he accidentally elbowed me in the face. I don't know which… Today, I'm here to inform men that, "If I fucked you, I wouldn't pull out" is not an effective pick…