Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Bostern

Online | Search for a member

Bostern

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 23 December 1992 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5412
  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Bostern : "The grass is always greener... in the coal mines. SO GET BACK TO WORK!!!" Kim Jong Un
"When life gives you lemons... HAVE YOU PAID YOUR TAXES?!?" Kim Il Sung

Bostern's page activity

Visits<b>Ashd09</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 10:29am<b>abattior</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 8:26pm<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 3:44am<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 4:19pm<b>tpm45</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 7:47pm<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 9:42am<b>sawapee</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 12:08am<b>mkr5014</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 7:29pm<b>tadienae</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 1:31am<b>origamidragon</b> - the 03/29/2014 at 10:13pm<b>danibugg</b> - the 03/17/2014 at 12:43am<b>vikky538</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 6:13pm<b>datfacedoe</b> - the 03/07/2014 at 3:45am<b>itsalanis</b> - the 02/28/2014 at 8:58pm<b>fmluser3250</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 5:47pm<b>MomentoMori</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 2:09pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 11:49pm<b>Tari</b> - the 01/16/2014 at 1:34am

Bostern's FML badges

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Bostern's badges

Bostern's favorite FMLs

Today, my grandma got up at 6:30am, clattered about the bathroom then sang religious songs at the top of her voice for half an hour. Apparently this is her normal routine, weekends included. She is staying with us for a month. FML

#15705276
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28780) - you deserved it (3305)

On 04/09/2011 at 4:21am - misc - by Riley (woman) - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)

Today, I was waiting for the bus while wearing my FML shirt. A passer-by stopped, stared at me for a moment, and said, "I agree, your life sucks." FML

#15528931
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28009) - you deserved it (54341) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/28/2011 at 9:51am - misc - by Danou - Sent from mobile version

Today, I am taking a 16 hour flight. Five minutes in, the lady on one side has clipped her toenails onto me and the guy on the other side has the most horrific gas I have ever smelled. To help this problem he bought a cheese plate from the stewardess. 15 hours and 55 minutes to go. FML

#15416169
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35830) - you deserved it (2885)

On 03/21/2011 at 2:36pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I flipped out when I saw a centipede. I screamed, very loudly and in a very high voice. My girlfriend came into the room, stomped on it, picked it up and threw it in the trashcan. I apologized to her for the scene and all she said was, "I'm used to it." FML

#15228646
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10841) - you deserved it (36987)

On 03/07/2011 at 11:17am - misc - by thenotsomanlyman - United States

Today, I was finally able to get up and take a shit after being bedridden due to my knee surgery. I had diarrhea and because I can't properly bend my knee, I can't wipe my butt. FML

#15207918
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30446) - you deserved it (3522)

On 03/05/2011 at 4:53pm - health - by 092492 - United States (California)

Today, my cat tried to kill me. While I was sleeping, he put his paws on either side of my face and laid down, covering my nose and mouth. While I was struggling to free myself, I could hear my sister laughing next to me. FML

#15051806
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26708) - you deserved it (4359)

On 02/20/2011 at 12:45pm - animals - by Michelle - United States (California)

Today, I was posted with a very lonely gate-guard. From the second I arrived, I had to listen to him drone on and on, and now I know his entire life story. I was there for four hours. FML

#14932572
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17454) - you deserved it (3636)

On 02/11/2011 at 4:54am - work - by anonymous -

Today, my boyfriend got a new rifle. He forced me to watch him stripping it, oiling it, and sliding things into its barrel. We then watched 'Enemy at the Gates'. I basically endured 4 hours of gun porn. FML

#14836344
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30370) - you deserved it (7372)

On 02/04/2011 at 2:59am - intimacy - by missbrit (woman) - United Kingdom (Staffordshire)

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69859) - you deserved it (6570)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, while in my doctor's packed waiting room, an elderly woman insisted I take her seat. I thanked her, but politely declined. She began to yell, saying I was "ungrateful", until I sat down. She then left, laughing, as I discovered that she peed in the chair. Apparently, she does this often. FML

Today, I accidentally drank my sister's science project. Her science project consisted of taking a glass of orange juice and putting maggots in it to see if they would live. I thought it was just pulp. FML

#14820384
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38333) - you deserved it (22435)

On 02/02/2011 at 11:46pm - misc - by Username -

Today, I woke up from my honeymoon to discover the love of my life is a bed wetter. FML

#14813959
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35626) - you deserved it (8729)

On 02/02/2011 at 4:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I dozed off during a lecture. When I woke up, I didn't recognize any of the people surrounding me, and I saw one guy pointing and laughing at me. It turns out, my professor instructed everyone to let me sleep because he wanted to see how long it would be before I woke up. I was asleep three hours. FML

#14650881
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9684) - you deserved it (29466)

On 01/20/2011 at 3:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I wrote a mental note: don't tell a couple of nuns that you used black magic to fix their computer. Then don't tell the story to your boss just as the nuns walk back in again. Then don't say "speak of the devil" to them. FML

#14647834
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10066) - you deserved it (33441)

On 01/20/2011 at 5:55am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my dad’s best friend, who has been his business associate for the past 28 years, took me to a Star Wars store for my 18th birthday. He put on a Darth Vader helmet, and imitating his voice, said: "I am your father." I laughed. It wasn’t a joke. FML

#14610612
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44032) - you deserved it (3001) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: