About Bostern : "The grass is always greener... in the coal mines. SO GET BACK TO WORK!!!" Kim Jong Un
"When life gives you lemons... HAVE YOU PAID YOUR TAXES?!?" Kim Il Sung
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Socialite
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
The Thumb strikes back
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
Today, my new neighbor moved in. Because she was fairly young, I offered to mow her grass whenever it needed cut. Her dad then tried to start a fight with me because he thought it was sexual come-on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32097) - you deserved it (5453)
On 05/14/2013 at 7:52pm - misc - by Brenden - United States (Ohio)
Today, for a laugh, I put vanilla yogurt into a mayonnaise jar and went to the mall to eat it with a spoon. Too bad that someone called mall security on me for disturbing the peace. They shoved me into a back room and grilled me about what was in the jar. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36252) - you deserved it (15895)
On 04/30/2013 at 11:09am - misc - by longsock123 - United States (California)
Today, I found out that Yale had actually accepted me seventeen years ago. My mother apparently burned my acceptance package and letters because she didn't want me to upstage her UChicago degree. FML
I agree, your life sucks (86270) - you deserved it (3209)
On 04/15/2013 at 3:37am - misc - by OPhere (man) - United States (California)
Today, I realized that I'm so lonely I can no longer whack off without bursting into tears and crying like a little bitch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32343) - you deserved it (13074)
On 03/29/2013 at 12:11am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, during a sex ed lesson, we were given a lecture on pregnancy and abortion from the school nurse. Throughout the session she kept repeating, "Of course, Sophie knows ALL about this." The nurse happens to know that my dad's a gynaecologist. That's not what everyone else in the year thinks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35550) - you deserved it (1613)
On 03/25/2013 at 5:53pm - misc - by Soph (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)
Today, my grandson visited me, and asked if I had any pictures of myself from when I was a little girl. I happily looked for a few photos to give him, asking what had piqued his curiosity. He replied that he wanted some for a presentation he's doing on the Middle Ages. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27218) - you deserved it (1756) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 03/22/2013 at 9:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France (Lorraine)
Today, my 2-year-old daughter and my 27-year-old husband both woke me up in the early hours of the morning. Their complaints were the same: they'd both wet the bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28707) - you deserved it (1753)
On 03/22/2013 at 5:53pm - misc - by sickness and health my sphincter (woman) - Singapore
Today, I learned that if not for my grandfather gifting my dad $200, I would have been named Anthrax. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26341) - you deserved it (1610)
On 03/20/2013 at 9:11pm - misc - by cheeseburglar_9000 (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, my girlfriend decided we are to the point in our relationship that it's considered acceptable to take a dump while I'm in there showering. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26072) - you deserved it (5141)
On 03/17/2013 at 1:05am - love - by jisaac09 (man) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, my boyfriend still won't talk to me, after I caused him the "worst embarrassment" of his life in front of his friends. What did I do wrong? I joined their conversation and ended up confusing the fictional characters of Gollum and Yoda with one another. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13253) - you deserved it (44601) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 03/15/2013 at 8:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France (Centre)
Today, at college, I finally talked myself into confessing my feelings to a girl I really like. Her response was to threaten to sue me. For what, exactly? I have no goddamned idea. I just don't understand people anymore. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26640) - you deserved it (1920)
On 03/15/2013 at 6:43pm - love - by forever single, I guess (man) - United States
Today, I met my mom's fiancé. He's a nice guy, he's also my wife's dad. I'll soon call my wife my sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40303) - you deserved it (1998)
On 03/15/2013 at 1:31am - misc - by guy - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I went to the movies with my boyfriend. The movie was in 3D, and he couldn't help but notice it would be much cooler if you could feel what the characters did. He spent the next two hours slapping me every time the person in the movie did, claiming the movie would be "better". FML
I agree, your life sucks (26974) - you deserved it (4281)
On 03/13/2013 at 5:06pm - misc - by bruised - Canada (New Brunswick)
Today, my 4-year-old daughter couldn't sleep, crying that her teddy bear wants to eat her. My husband thought it would be funny to put the bear right in front of her face while she slept. She's now terrified to sleep anywhere but in our bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24794) - you deserved it (4019)
On 03/11/2013 at 7:32pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland
Today, my boyfriend drove me back home. My dad was sitting on the porch in his underwear, with his shotgun in his lap. He stroked the gun, looked my boyfriend dead in the eyes, and slowly shook his head. Now my boyfriend refuses to see me for his own safety. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28276) - you deserved it (2526)
On 03/10/2013 at 6:37pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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